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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want a cleaner that will pick my clothes up off the floor?

770 replies

Zamphina · 03/10/2023 22:19

Dp and I work very long hours during the week. We’re out of the house 9-10 minimum. We eat dinner in the office. When we get home we’re exhausted and just want to sleep. So often the kitchen has our breakfast stuff. We’ve left clothes on the floor. There might be sunday’s dishes on the table. The laundry has been left out drying.

We earn an OK salary and have a tiny flat to save money, so a cleaner coming 2-3 times a week for two hours a time won’t be an issue.

But obviously I’m slightly embarrassed for someone to see my home in such a mess. Are there any cleaners who will sort all of this? Pick up the clothes, put them on to wash, load the dishwasher, and clean the bathroom etc?

OP posts:
Glumhumdrum · 04/10/2023 08:39

If you’re old enough to put your clothes on properly you’re old enough to take them off properly, surely?

@HongKongGarden
Not necessarily solely lawyers or bankers. Nannies, health consultants, pilots, so many more lines of work than the two you mentioned.

HereForTheFreeLunch · 04/10/2023 08:40

Ah... recent grads... you missing Mum? Smile

but on a serious note, just ask. You will need to pay for extra time of course.

My one even cooks simple food at a push.

Tdcp · 04/10/2023 08:41

BlackForestHotChocolate · 03/10/2023 22:24

I agree with this.

surely 9-10 hours out of the house is standard really for most people with full time jobs?

Show quote history

I'm out of the house 10 hours 5 days a week and I have a 9 year old. I thought it was normal too?

By all means get a cleaner OP, I used to be one, they're there to clean and won't judge the mess but really a good routine seems to be what you both could do with.

StressyMessyJess · 04/10/2023 08:44

Hi, I'm a professional cleaner and happily tidy up/ do laundry/ wash up, etc.
As long as your cleaner agrees to this and you understand that it will add extra time there's no problem.
I don't think you're lazy and wouldn't judge my clients for clothes on floor or washing up in sink

Bellaboo01 · 04/10/2023 08:44

Zamphina · 03/10/2023 22:19

Dp and I work very long hours during the week. We’re out of the house 9-10 minimum. We eat dinner in the office. When we get home we’re exhausted and just want to sleep. So often the kitchen has our breakfast stuff. We’ve left clothes on the floor. There might be sunday’s dishes on the table. The laundry has been left out drying.

We earn an OK salary and have a tiny flat to save money, so a cleaner coming 2-3 times a week for two hours a time won’t be an issue.

But obviously I’m slightly embarrassed for someone to see my home in such a mess. Are there any cleaners who will sort all of this? Pick up the clothes, put them on to wash, load the dishwasher, and clean the bathroom etc?

So you are out 9am - 10pm and you eat dinner at work. Am i right in assuming you dont have any children? So it is just you and your husband? I think it's gross to leave your dirty plates etc out and not sort them out/put them in the dishwasher etc. My H and I work full time, long hours and have two kids but, we can clear up after ourselves.

Why dont you instead of throwing your dirty knickers/pants on the floor before flopping into bed, just throw them into a washing basket? I wouldnt want/expect my cleaner to pick up our dirty clothes off the floor but, i also wouldnt throw dirty clothes on the floor - i'd put them in a washing basket.

Picklemeyellow · 04/10/2023 08:46

I run my own home help business, have 2 dc and care for my mum who has Alzheimer’s. I don’t have time to fart these days but still don’t leave my clothes on the floor, I’m an adult.
And even the people I work for (mainly elderly and disabled) leave their dirty clothes in a laundry basket for me.
Unless you are lazy teens there really is no need for this.

Branleuse · 04/10/2023 08:46

In my experience, cleaners have always tidied if I've specified I'd like tidying as well as cleaning, but bear in mind that they then won't have as much time for a proper clean, so it makes sense to do the quick and easy bits yourself. You have to decide the stuff you want to outsource and the stuff you can do as a family to save money. If my house was a bit out of control then my cleaner would make it presentable for me and get it so I didn't feel awful, but on times when I was on top of stuff a bit better, then she would clean deeper.
I've never had a cleaner that wouldn't tidy, but I think you definitely need to ask, as I've heard it's a thing.

WrongSwanson · 04/10/2023 08:48

I advertised for a housekeeper so she does do a lot of picking up stuff and sorting etc as well as cleaning. I'm going to ignore the judgy comments. This arrangement has enabled me to progress rapidly in my career while juggling with being a single mum who wanted to have lots of good time with my children. It also now enables me to cope with a difficult neurological condition.

And i'm guessing it works for my housekeeper too as she's been working for me for over a decade now - she knows I don't mind her switching her days /hours /Not coming if she has a family difficulty.

HongKongGarden · 04/10/2023 08:48

Zamphina · 04/10/2023 00:24

thank you to the few compassionate posters. I’d promised myself I wouldn’t let things get this way, but it’s hard starting out

No matter how hard your job is, choosing to leave your dirty knickers on the floor for a week rather than dropping them in your laundry basket is still not normal.

That’s a deliberate choice that you are making, it’s nothing to do with being busy. It’s as though you weren’t flushing the toilet because of the time it takes.

Branleuse · 04/10/2023 08:48

Also problem with clothes being on the floor, they're not going to do the sniff test are they. My cleaner would fold everything and put it away, so even worn stuff would get put with clean stuff.

Jibo · 04/10/2023 08:49

Get a housekeeper.
Or:
Clean up the kitchen on Sunday night after dinner and stop eating breakfast at home during the week, that way it will stay clean!
Get a chair in your bedroom so you have somewhere to chuck clothes that have been worn but don't yet need washing.
If you don't have one, get a laundry basket for dirty clothes, ideally one with sections for light, dark, dry clean only.

GodDammitCecil · 04/10/2023 08:51

StressyMessyJess · 04/10/2023 08:44

Hi, I'm a professional cleaner and happily tidy up/ do laundry/ wash up, etc.
As long as your cleaner agrees to this and you understand that it will add extra time there's no problem.
I don't think you're lazy and wouldn't judge my clients for clothes on floor or washing up in sink

You pick up people’s dirty undies?

Hocuspocus99 · 04/10/2023 08:52

Well I do that as a cleaner , you basically tidy up as you go . I don’t expect houses to be tidy when I arrive ,but what you have to realise it cuts into the time of your expected clean .

BungalowBuyer · 04/10/2023 08:59

You can pay someone to do practical anything if you have enough money, I agree you need a housekeeper not a cleaner.

Lifeomars · 04/10/2023 09:00

If you are out for 10 - 12 hours a day and live in a small flat why is it getting in such a state? You could stop chucking your clothes on the floor, it makes a room look extra untidy and isn't good for the clothes. Get into a routine about the dishes and a bit of basic tidying, yes it is tedious especially when you are tired, but little and often really helps

FormerlyPathologicallyHappy · 04/10/2023 09:01

It’s a big adjustment going from uni to work like this.

You need a wash basket in the bedroom with a dark/light/white section, won’t look pretty but makes laundry easier and cleaner can stick a load on.

I wouldn’t like your hours either it would exhaust me too, take the easy way with the rest of life.

ClairDeLaLune · 04/10/2023 09:04

It takes seconds to put clothes away or in the laundry basket. I know this because sometimes I can’t be arsed to do it either! I make sure I pick them all up before my cleaner comes though because I think it’s a bit disrespectful to them to expect them to touch my unwashed washing. Also I pay them to clean not tidy.

A little bit of effort on your and DP’s part will make a big difference to your flat OP.

There’s a lot of jealousy here about your salary!

Justneedagirlname · 04/10/2023 09:05

YANBU. I had a cleaner like that - just make it clear when you hire them that they will need to tidy up too and exactly what they’ll need to do. You’ll find someone.
you are paying for the service- you can set the parameters

WombatChocolate · 04/10/2023 09:11

People can have whatever service they require, if they will pay for it and can find a person who delivers it. And people certainly deliver the service OP requires.

People seem very judgey. Of course everyone who has a cleaner or gardener or Personal Assistant could do those things too. Clearing up breakfast dishes or the dinner from night before, or picking up dirty clothes….it’s all just another job and one people do if paid.

It’s not standard cleaner work, but if it’s explained clearly, some will be prepared to do it. yes, sounds like housekeeper or homehelp type work.

If OP is prepared to pay a decent rate, people will do it.

I had a friend with a daily housekeeper who came in at 7.30 as they left in the school run. That housekeeper cleaned the breakfast stuff and the dinner stuff that remained from the day before and did a tidy round, picked up toys and tidied the kids’ bedrooms, including doing a load of laundry and dropping off collected dry cleaning. When friend returned late morning after her run or coffee stop after the school run, the house was all lovely and ship-shape. Some would say she should have done it all herself…she didn’t work….but she had the money to pay someone else and chose to do it.

I know a local service which will basically do whatever jobs you require, for quite a hefty fee. They will organise a kids party, wait in for parcel delivery, build flat pack furniture, do a one off clean, go to IKEA for you or anywhere else, get you a babysitter, arrange a school pick-up. Lots of people outsource lots of life’s jobs - they might be too busy or just dint want to do them. They pay for the services they receive.

MyAnacondaMight · 04/10/2023 09:13

You’re getting an unnecessarily hard time on here. You’re exhausted and overwhelmed, not lazy.

Things you can do:

  • Outsource laundry. Get a few big laundry bags and put all dirty laundry direct into them. Hang one on the back of the bedroom door. Then arrange a laundry service to collect and return.
  • Stop making meals that you don’t have the bandwidth to clean up. Get some healthy ready meals in the freezer. Have breakfast at work.
  • Hire a cleaner to come twice a week, to look after the rest.

It gets better. The work remains relentless, but the pay picks up and you do find a bit more time to pick up your socks.

MontyJames · 04/10/2023 09:16

what a lazy pair ! have you shame ?

Oblomov23 · 04/10/2023 09:19

Not putting dirty pants in the washing basket is a choice. It's got nothing to do with tiredness. OP is just choosing not to do this. This strikes as as odd to some of us. But the fact is op chooses to live this way / behave like that.

Mangolover123 · 04/10/2023 09:21

Pay a decent whack and tell your cleaner what to do and give her more time to do it.
Though personally I would be embarrassed if my cleaner had to pick my knickers off the floor or as someone else said get some laundry baskets.

belgiumchocolates · 04/10/2023 09:24

YANBU OP, sounds like you need a tidier cleaner combination to relive stress in your life. So if you advertise on this basis then someone who provides this service will come along to offer help. Hope you can get something sorted

Startingagainandagain · 04/10/2023 09:28

Lazy and slovenly...

Why do you need to throw your clothes on the floor? you are not a grumpy teenager with no sense of hygiene.

Get a laundry basket...

Then find someone who is willing to do your laundry as well once or twice a week and hang the clothes to dry.