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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want a cleaner that will pick my clothes up off the floor?

770 replies

Zamphina · 03/10/2023 22:19

Dp and I work very long hours during the week. We’re out of the house 9-10 minimum. We eat dinner in the office. When we get home we’re exhausted and just want to sleep. So often the kitchen has our breakfast stuff. We’ve left clothes on the floor. There might be sunday’s dishes on the table. The laundry has been left out drying.

We earn an OK salary and have a tiny flat to save money, so a cleaner coming 2-3 times a week for two hours a time won’t be an issue.

But obviously I’m slightly embarrassed for someone to see my home in such a mess. Are there any cleaners who will sort all of this? Pick up the clothes, put them on to wash, load the dishwasher, and clean the bathroom etc?

OP posts:
CharlotteRumpling · 04/10/2023 07:37

Ugh I would never leave skidmarks either.
I do have a cleaner.

Merry05 · 04/10/2023 07:41

I mean it’s doable. I have a 4 bed, 2 kids, a dog, a DH who works 12 hour shifts and I myself work FT which means I can be out of the house 10 hours a day depending on kids drop offs activities it may be longer. Still manage to keep my house clean and tidy, including kids bedrooms, everyone has clean clothes etc. I don’t think you quite realise that this is adulting. Working and maintaining a home, I mean it sucks, but it’s not impossible.
You need a routine and to stick to it.

Cailin66 · 04/10/2023 07:43

Zamphina · 04/10/2023 00:24

thank you to the few compassionate posters. I’d promised myself I wouldn’t let things get this way, but it’s hard starting out

My cleaner is a goddess and I couldn’t live without her. You need one but it’s stupid to pay for certain things. So dirty clothes go in the laundry basket. And put on the dishwasher before you go to bed on Sundays. You need discipline and good habits for yourself. Never ask a cleaner to do jobs she doesn’t like. Everybody has their quirks. Make a list of what you need to be done. Put it up on here for advice on it from those of us who appreciate the difference a cleaner can make to working mums life.

NeedToChangeName · 04/10/2023 07:43

Scaraben · 04/10/2023 03:59

I thought it was fairly obvious from the OP she meant she was out from 9am-10pm, otherwise she'd have written '9-10hrs".

OP, when we were junior doctors we had jobs like this. Left house at 7am, rarely home before 10pm. We had a cleaner who would do laundry and dishes for us. I found it wasn't possible during the week to get these tasks done and as we were in the house so little the dishes we created from breakfast Monday would have been in a state by the time there were enough to actually put a dishwasher load on (if we'd had one). Similarly we could put a laundry on last thing at night or on a timer to end before leaving for work in the morning but our neighbours complained. Putting it on at 7am before leaving for work would then mean it sat in the machine for 14hrs and smelled.

When you've been out working this long of course you're exhausted and just want to collapse into bed after maybe a tiny bit of down time.

Anyway our cleaner came 3x weekly and put the laundry on, then did e.g. the bathrooms one day, the Hoovering another, etc. She hung up the laundry to dry before she left. We would leave our breakfast things in the sink. We didn't leave our clothes on the floor but left them in a hamper and she knew which day was what. Obviously towels and sheets need done too so she would also change our bedsheets weekly.

This was all agreed in advance and she seemed happy with the arrangement. It only ended when we got more senior jobs and moved away.

I think you need to speak to cleaners / agencies and explain what you are looking for.

Good post

Londonscallingme · 04/10/2023 07:44

MouseMattress · 03/10/2023 22:23

I am sure there are cleaners who will sort the dishwasher, wash bedding etc. But leaving clothes on the floor is a bit slobby. Surely you can just do that bit yourself!

It feels vaguely disrespectful to ask another adult to do this for you, even if paying them.

But fine to ask them to clean your toilet? Not sure that makes sense. I’d rather pick up after someone than clean their bathroom, given the choice.

Zanatdy · 04/10/2023 07:48

kamboozled · 04/10/2023 06:42

That's an 'OK' combined salary? lol

The best salary I've ever had is £20k a year, and I'm 36 now with two science degree's.

You've done well, but that's a HUGE salary, average median in UK is £27,756

Show quote history

Not in London it’s not, hence the small flat. They are graduates and will earn a lot more in the future - hence all the long hours

RosesAndHellebores · 04/10/2023 07:48

You pay the money, a cleaner renders the service you request. End of.

I would try to put the dirty dishes in the sink or dishy though because there is a risk of vermin.

Mysonwontwash · 04/10/2023 07:48

It sounds like you are just adjusting to adulthood. You’ll get there eventually, and if not you just get used to the chaos 😁

If you decide to Have children and pets at some point then you’ll know what exhaustion is!

itsgettingweird · 04/10/2023 07:49

Get a laundry basket - takes 2 secs to out clothes in it.

Look for a housekeeper opposed to just a cleaner.

Londonscallingme · 04/10/2023 07:52

I have no idea why some people have decided it’s ok to pay someone to do some jobs for you but others are somehow heinous requests. There is no difference asking someone to wash up your dirty dishes or do your laundry (including picking up your clothes) than cleaning your bathroom or scrubbing the inside of your oven. Weird how people draw totally arbitrary lines in the sand about stuff.

It’s fine OP, just make sure you are clear at the outset what you are looking for and the person csn choose to accept the role or not. As others have said, you need a housekeeper, not a standard cleaner.

Maka21 · 04/10/2023 07:53

If you are out of the house most of the time, how much mess are you actually making? I find when we have been out that is when the house is the tidiest!

NeedToChangeName · 04/10/2023 07:54

Rather than one person coming 2 - 3 times per week, you might find it easier to recruit someone for a whole day eg approx 9am to 3pm, to coincide with school hours. I imagine that would be attractive to some people

Best be very honest about what you're looking for

Merrymouse · 04/10/2023 07:58

Londonscallingme · 04/10/2023 07:52

I have no idea why some people have decided it’s ok to pay someone to do some jobs for you but others are somehow heinous requests. There is no difference asking someone to wash up your dirty dishes or do your laundry (including picking up your clothes) than cleaning your bathroom or scrubbing the inside of your oven. Weird how people draw totally arbitrary lines in the sand about stuff.

It’s fine OP, just make sure you are clear at the outset what you are looking for and the person csn choose to accept the role or not. As others have said, you need a housekeeper, not a standard cleaner.

Is the cleaner/housekeeper supposed to give them the sniff test to decide if they need cleaning?

It seems so much easier to chuck things in a laundry basket or throw them on a chair if they can be worn again.

PoshHorseyBird · 04/10/2023 08:00

I don't understand why people are being so critical!
The OP didn't ask if everyone thought they were lazy or not, they asked if a cleaner would pick up after them!
OP at the end of the day you need to find a cleaning company or someone who does it privately and ask. Be very clear about what you would like and they'll either say yes or no.
I work for myself as a cleaner and I'd be happy to do jobs like this as long as I had enough time, it's when clients book you for say 2 hours cleaning, then also expect you to do unexpected washing up etc on top that theres a problem. I need extra time to do extra jobs.
Having said that it would be easier for someone if you did put dirty clothes in a wash basket so they can tell what's clean and what's dirty.
Like I say list everything you want doing and ask of that's something someone is prepared to do. They'll either say yes or no.

LolaSmiles · 04/10/2023 08:11

The jealousy in this thread is palpable!As long as she is being upfront about her requirements and is offering a fair wage then it’s a business arrangement she’s looking to establish in her home.

I'm not sure it is jealousy. Jealousy is always chucked around on here any time someone disagrees with something when it's just a difference of opinion.

I agree with you that as long as she's clear about what service she's looking for and pays a fair wage then it's a business arrangement though.

Abi86 · 04/10/2023 08:13

Hey, I’m with you OP. You pay for a (legal) service, whatever that might be. In this case you need someone to tidy and clean. I’m guessing there will be someone who can and will cater to your needs. Don’t worry about the haters on here. People pay for all sorts of services. Looking after their kids, cleaning, getting fit, telling you what to eat, tidying, doing gardens, clipping your animals claws, even outsourcing sex. It’s just a service.

Fingeronthebutton · 04/10/2023 08:13

I cleaned for many years. Customers often thought they were interviewing me, but, I was interviewing them. I would ask them exactly ( and I mean *exactly) what they wanted done. As long as the time paid for allowed me to do everything they wanted, I’d do it.
So, OP, be open and upfront about what you want. There’s not much that will shock cleaners 😂

Excited101 · 04/10/2023 08:16

My cleaner would do this, she’s amazing- she does pretty much anything if we need it tbh. But she wouldn’t know which items needed to go where- so that’s worth baring in mind.

but your hours aren’t horrific- I do between 50 and 65 working hours out of the house per week (plus commute), DP isn’t always far off that but he can WFH. We have a cleaner once every 2 weeks.

Merrymouse · 04/10/2023 08:18

Pay for any service you want, but wouldn’t you rather pay for a great holiday than for somebody else to throw the clean clothes on your floordrobe in the washing machine?

Ceramic272 · 04/10/2023 08:18

Another thought is a lot of cleaning agencies will have minimum hours (like 4 hours) so if your flat is tiny they may well offer to help with laundry loads and folding or ironing too to fill up the remaining time. I remember one of mine offered this when I was in a tiny flat, but others since then has been happy to do it, and I just pay for the time.
it’s really the leaving clothes on the floor bit that is annoying people (myself included).. I do sympathise with the chaos but no one is that busy or important (I’m sure you don’t mean it that way but it comes off like that a bit). I’d be quite unimpressed if a junior at work told me they didn’t have time to pick up their clothes.

Londonscallingme · 04/10/2023 08:21

Merrymouse · 04/10/2023 07:58

Is the cleaner/housekeeper supposed to give them the sniff test to decide if they need cleaning?

It seems so much easier to chuck things in a laundry basket or throw them on a chair if they can be worn again.

Show quote history

I agree it’s easier to do it yourself and I wouldn’t personally think it worthwhile getting someone to do it but some people are reacting like the OP has asked for something totally outrageous, my point is, each to their own. To answer your question - presumably you’d need a rule - anything on the floor goes in the wash.

Londonscallingme · 04/10/2023 08:25

Merrymouse · 04/10/2023 08:18

Pay for any service you want, but wouldn’t you rather pay for a great holiday than for somebody else to throw the clean clothes on your floordrobe in the washing machine?

I guess it’s not one or the other.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 04/10/2023 08:28

Try putting dirty clothes in the washing basket as you take them off and hang up jackets etc also as you take them off rather than chucking everything on the floor. You’re not 14.

Middleagedmeangirls · 04/10/2023 08:34

The problem with this is that it will probably take longer to show a cleaner the proper places to put things away than it would to do it yourself. And they will inevitably put things in the wrong place sometimes so you will then have to waste time looking for things.

I'm retired now so have plenty of time to do my own cleaning if I chose to but having a fortnightly cleaner forces me to tidy up the night before they come thus stopping my house falling into total chaos.

Kittylickingplate · 04/10/2023 08:36

Go for it, as long as they know exactly what you need and you pay for the hours. I would do it as a job.