Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

When does the fun stuff stop

79 replies

Banditandchilliputustoshame · 02/10/2023 16:17

With kids?

Its exhausting undoubtedly but lots of fun activities with Dd, 5. What age does this generally end..?

OP posts:
EaudeJavel · 02/10/2023 18:01

How depressing if it had to stop! It doesn't. You just need to change the activities to make them age-appropriate. You might not get big whoops of cheer if you try to take your 14 year old Pippa Pig's world, but you can easily replace it with another outing 😂

It's only tricky when you have a big age gap between kids, and you can't really please everyone.

Not only it doesn't stop after 5, but it gets better and better, easier too as they become more independent, more adult and more on your level (you being an adult).

sunnydayhereandnow · 02/10/2023 18:02

When I was 42 I went on a city break to Istanbul with my (widowed) dad for his 71st. It was great! Plenty of ice creams and Turkish delight, maybe fewer playgrounds though.

Didimum · 02/10/2023 18:04

No one seems to want to give you any meaningful answers, OP. I don't have older children, but my sister has two older girls. She often said around 12/13 was when they largely started to lose interest in doing much with her, instead preferring to spend time in their room alone or with their friends. I also found at that time they stopped wanted to spend time doing as much 'fun stuff' with their smaller cousins (my kids).

Didimum · 02/10/2023 18:07

liveforsummer · 02/10/2023 17:54

Not sure it's that normal. Not among DD's friends anyway.

Show quote history

That's definitely the norm with the people who have pre-teens that I know.

Ragwort · 02/10/2023 18:07

My 90 year old mum and I had ice creams and a boat trip today Grin

Dramatic · 02/10/2023 18:07

Some kids stop wanting to do stuff from around 12 I've found, however even the grumpiest teen can be cajoled out of their room for activities like bowling etc. Once they're there you usually find they have a whale of a time even if they eye rolled and groaned at the prospect of leaving their cess pit.

Beachwalker66 · 02/10/2023 18:09

DD wasn’t very keen on family life from 13-19.

Now they’re both early twenties and we still have loads of fun together.

EaudeJavel · 02/10/2023 18:19

Didimum · 02/10/2023 18:04

No one seems to want to give you any meaningful answers, OP. I don't have older children, but my sister has two older girls. She often said around 12/13 was when they largely started to lose interest in doing much with her, instead preferring to spend time in their room alone or with their friends. I also found at that time they stopped wanted to spend time doing as much 'fun stuff' with their smaller cousins (my kids).

how is "no, the fun stuff doesn't stop after 5" not meaningful?

Do you only want people with grumpy and isolated teenagers? Many families still do things together, thank god. You just plan different things when you have a toddler or a teen. Surely that bit is obvious?

I am curious what your definition of "fun" is if it's restricted to under 5 activities.

EaudeJavel · 02/10/2023 18:21

Dramatic · 02/10/2023 18:07

Some kids stop wanting to do stuff from around 12 I've found, however even the grumpiest teen can be cajoled out of their room for activities like bowling etc. Once they're there you usually find they have a whale of a time even if they eye rolled and groaned at the prospect of leaving their cess pit.

true

Same as young children who are equally guilty of strongly refusing to do anything. Then point blank refusing to leave ever what you spent the last hour convincing them to try 😂

Ozgirl75 · 02/10/2023 18:40

The other brilliant thing is that you can do the fun thing with them, and then they can also entertain themselves too. So we might have a trip out to do something, and then come home and one practices keepy uppies or listens to music for a while, and I can also read or do something. Plus we can watch good films together - just wanted Edge of Tomorrow this weekend.

Tiredalwaystired · 02/10/2023 18:46

Mine are teens. We still have loads of fun. We’re going to a Queen tribute act at the weekend and went to a festival last weekend.

We also play loads of board games, watch movies and go shopping.

Depends what you class as fun.

Didimum · 02/10/2023 19:06

EaudeJavel · 02/10/2023 18:19

how is "no, the fun stuff doesn't stop after 5" not meaningful?

Do you only want people with grumpy and isolated teenagers? Many families still do things together, thank god. You just plan different things when you have a toddler or a teen. Surely that bit is obvious?

I am curious what your definition of "fun" is if it's restricted to under 5 activities.

Show quote history

It's not my definition of 'fun', the OP gave her own: ice creams, zoos, bouncy castles and playgrounds. I gave an example of when the pre-teens/teens I know have largely stopped or reduced wanting to spend time doing things like that, and also reluctant to engage in a fair few family activities without cajoling. No need to get up in arms about someone's answer.

liveforsummer · 02/10/2023 19:12

@Didimum but you don't have any teens/pre teens of your own?

Didimum · 02/10/2023 19:17

liveforsummer · 02/10/2023 19:12

@Didimum but you don't have any teens/pre teens of your own?

My answer was very clear – I think you should get over it and find something else to do with your evening.

InTheFutilityRoomEatingBiscuits · 02/10/2023 19:24

We do all of the above and haven’t stopped. Late teens, mid teens and a tween here. Nobody has ever confined themselves to their bedrooms in lieu of fun stuff.

As for big age gaps, actually find the older ones want to do the little kid stuff for way longer and having the smaller sibling gives them that excuse. I mean, it’s not cool to watch Frozen when you are 11 but if your younger sibling is obsessed with it and you HAVE to watch it, then that’s different. You can enjoy it and sing along with sibling, then eyeroll about what you had to do, with your friends. Win win, right?

thelinkisdead · 02/10/2023 19:31

Gosh I hate soft play and zoos and bouncy castles so for me the question would be, ‘When did the fun start?’ and the answer to that would be over the past few years (mine are Y6 and Y3). Now I can take them anywhere and they’ll behave / sit and chat. They like eating out, walks, exploring cities, castles, woods, visits to the pub… The list is endless! I think each age gets more fun!

Titsywoo · 02/10/2023 19:37

At 19 and 16 mine just keep getting more fun and we never really had a bad time in the teen years!

jolaylasofia · 03/10/2023 06:23

i'm the grumpy mom who doesn't find any of that fun anyway...bouncy castles were hell. literal hell! and zoos were boring, huge and a rip off!!! now it's marginally better- they are teenagers and would rather lie in their darkened rooms listening to some teenage depression ballads than even entertain the thought of spending time with mum and dad.

Aydahayda · 03/10/2023 06:28

SamAndEIIa · 02/10/2023 16:27

This is the weirdest post ever 😂

Im in my mid 30s and my mum and I still sometimes eat ice cream or go to the cinema. Except the bonus is she doesn’t need to wipe my arse or stop me running into traffic now.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

TheaBrandt · 03/10/2023 06:49

My mid teen is the direct opposite of in her room. Last weekend she literally had a 90 min free slot between various social engagements so we all went out for brunch then which was lovely.

I can see why she’s in demand she’s great company. So I guess the fun has not stopped for her - but sadly for us it has redirected elsewhere! My older teen is calmer but has a part time job and a levels so is also busy.

MissDollyMix · 03/10/2023 06:56

Things change but they change very slowly so you’ll have plenty of time to get used to it! Mine are 13 and 10 now and we still have great fun together. They were sweet when they were 5 but I wouldn’t go back there. No way! Too much hard work!

CanIPutTheTreeUpYet · 03/10/2023 07:10

I have teenagers. They haven't got the typical teenager personalities. The fun definitely hasn't stopped in this house. I don't think it ever will.

Just last night we played Exploding Kittens together while dinner was cooking. I'm planning a small Halloween party/movie night for them and their friends, at their request. I play on the computer with them or watch them play. They bake cookies/learn to cook etc with me. Come for walks with us. We hide behind corners and scare eachother. They wrestle with their dad, always have done but now that the testosterone is flowing, they want to see if they're stronger than him yet.... they're not but they have fun trying!

Life is mostly easy with them and the day is better when they're around. We all have a similar personality which helps.

foghead · 03/10/2023 07:39

The fun changes. The fun stuff you're thinking about probably stops by the time kids finish primary school.
My teens are fun. We watch tv/films, go to the cinema, go out to eat, I can drag them out for a walk (which is omg so boring but once there 'yeah it's ok') every now and then but it usually involves a bribe.
Play cards, Xbox, laugh at random stuff.
Bowling, ice skating, weekends away still happen.

londonrach · 03/10/2023 07:44

It never does ..it just changes....my dsis is really enjoying going for a tea and cake with her teenage daughter and shopping with her....I'm enjoying conker hunting but looking forward to the tea and cake too...just enjoying each stage ...

gotomomo · 03/10/2023 07:51

The fun stuff begins when they get older, my DD's are adults and we have great nights! I hated soft play (think they only ever went twice) waiting in the play park (no issues with walking in parks, it's the standing around), swimming in family sessions (too noisy) - once they got to 6 or so we started going much nicer things like the theatre, concerts, board game nights, nice restaurants, historic sights etc... they choose to do all of these even without me.