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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not have apologised for being 1 minute late for preschool

59 replies

adhas · 27/09/2023 19:18

My DD, is in preschool which is part of a bigger school.

She's not in reception yet, she starts reception next year.

I had a nightmare morning today and long story short, DD was about one minute late. I didn't apologise to the teachers, but kind of felt like they wanted me to.

It's a weird one because I would have probably apologised if we were properly late, but because it was borderline I didn't.

Still I got a bit of a vibe from them, but even though I got then vibe, I didn't apologise.

Would you have apologised ? I suspect I need to put my hard hat on for these replies...

OP posts:
OnAFrolicOfMyOwn · 27/09/2023 19:21

I don't think it would have hurt to apologise. You're either late or not late, and you were late.

StarlightGin · 27/09/2023 19:22

Sounds like a complete non event to me...

Assuming it genuinely was one minute? If you were getting bad vibes it probably wasn't.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 27/09/2023 19:22

I definitely would for picking up, dropping off not so much

LlynTegid · 27/09/2023 19:23

Yes you should have apologised. I host a daily call, which always starts on time, and people do apologise for being even a minute late.

Hummingbird89 · 27/09/2023 19:26

If it was genuinely one minute, literally 60 seconds late, I’m willing to bet the teachers didn’t even realise.
If the other children were all in, coats off, on the carpet ready to start the day, YABU.

NumberTheory · 27/09/2023 19:28

If your “minute late” was a minute when they were corralling the kids in the playground and it wasn’t noticeable one or the other that you’d just turned up, an apology would be unnecessary (possibly a bit disruptive). If they had started something so that your late arrival meant they were pulled out of routine or disrupted in some way, even a small way, then an apology would be appropriate.

But it does sound like a bit of a non-event.

coxesorangepippin · 27/09/2023 19:29

No.

Believe me, they'll be late at some point too!

MoggyP · 27/09/2023 19:29

Of course you apologise for being late, because you were late

FOJN · 27/09/2023 19:32

What is borderline late? If your're supposed to be there by 9am and you turn up at one minute past then you are late. Not sure why you wouldn't just apologise.

It would have taken less effort to just say, "sorry we're late" than it has to start a thread justifying why you didn't apologise. Is saying sorry usually difficult for you?

It wasn't a big deal but you seem to have made it one.

stonedaisy · 27/09/2023 19:35

Of course you should have apologised?
What would it have cost you?
Are you ok?

ThatMrsM · 27/09/2023 19:36

It depends...if the other children were already inside and the teachers had to go out of their way to let you in then yes I'd apologize.

If I was one minute late dropping off my son at preschool no one would notice as there would still be some people waiting in the queue to go in. So I wouldn't apologize if that's the case.

Acheyknees · 27/09/2023 19:36

How many minutes late do you think deserves any apology?
Was it really that difficult to say sorry?

MoonShinesBright · 27/09/2023 19:43

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

MaggieFS · 27/09/2023 19:45

Good manners don't cost anything. You were late.

SeptemberTime · 27/09/2023 19:45

It’s pre school?! Not school! There has never been any mention of ‘children need to be dropped off at exactly 9am’ at ours so I would assume it’s flexible to be completely honest.

Rachaelrachael · 27/09/2023 19:51

I didn't realise pre-schools are so strict about time keeping? My daughter goes to a private nursery and I can drop off/pick up whenever (within her paid for hours). I was thinking of changing her to our local pre-school when she turns 3, but this has put me off!

StarlightGin · 27/09/2023 19:51

SeptemberTime · 27/09/2023 19:45

It’s pre school?! Not school! There has never been any mention of ‘children need to be dropped off at exactly 9am’ at ours so I would assume it’s flexible to be completely honest.

I wouldn't assume any such thing 😵‍💫

Lucyintheskywithadiamond · 27/09/2023 19:53

For me it would have an automatic acknowledgement, I don’t think I would thought about it, it would have just come out. Bit of a non event really and will be forgotten about already.

MrsMarzetti · 27/09/2023 20:02

SeptemberTime · 27/09/2023 19:45

It’s pre school?! Not school! There has never been any mention of ‘children need to be dropped off at exactly 9am’ at ours so I would assume it’s flexible to be completely honest.

Not it is not flexible. Why should you interrupt Register or another child taking their turn to tell the class any news they had to tell ?

Grumpyold · 27/09/2023 20:03

I don't know why it needs thinking about. I'd have said sorry almost as a reflex, it's just what you do, like please and thank you.

AlwaysFoldingWashing · 27/09/2023 20:04

I disagree it was 'borderline'- late is late and I would have apologised personally

Embarrassednamechangeadoddle · 27/09/2023 20:06

Yes I would have said a quick apology….it’s just polite isn’t it? It’s not a big deal but I’d just have automatically said “sorry we ran late this morning” without even thinking about it.

WhoWhereHow · 27/09/2023 20:06

It seems a weird thing to make a point of not apologising? Late is late, its not a mortal sin and 60 seconds isn't going to cause much disruption but an apology and a recognition to the staff that you know the start time doesn't take 2 seconds?

Cascais · 27/09/2023 20:12

Yes

MrsR87 · 27/09/2023 20:15

WhoWhereHow · 27/09/2023 20:06

It seems a weird thing to make a point of not apologising? Late is late, its not a mortal sin and 60 seconds isn't going to cause much disruption but an apology and a recognition to the staff that you know the start time doesn't take 2 seconds?

Definitely this!

I teach in a secondary school and my pupils know to apologise if they are a minute late. If the door is closed they know they are late and whilst I’m not going to get cross about it for the sake of a minute, it’s good manners as they are most probably interrupting the register or an explanation of homework etc.