For 18 year old son to get a dog

[Sadless]

Aibu to think it's a stupid idea for my 18 year old son to get a dog off Facebook for free. He doesn't live at home he lives in a shared house that doesn't allow animals so his friend and girlfriend will have it staying at there houses. But he will be responsible for it he doesn't work so is living off less then £300 a month.

Your son is so naive. Nothing you can do though

And why are they getting rid of the dog instead of the puppies that naturally are sold when the right age. It’s definitely not a pure breed labrador

He can’t own a dog he doesn’t live with. That is not how it works.

Must admit, thought it was a lab cross, but after looking at cane corse (with floppy ears, not pointed ears), I’ll have to agree.

Poor dog will end up as an unwanted rescue 😞

Agree that has to be the starting point. Just in case he has any idea of you having it while he's away, going round in an emergency, assisting with vet bills and the like.

He's not said anything today about getting the dog so hopefully it won't happen.

Is he jobseeking?

I have a small dog, 7kg in size.

I pay £12.50 a month for health care plan with vets - that’s for wormer and tick treatment monthly, annual vaccinations and a annual
check up.

£19.50 a month pet insurance.

£54 every 28 days for food - butternut box.

Even if his cost were similar to mine, which they won’t cos of size of dog, he can’t afford that on £300 a month.

Madness

Sweet dog, looks like a cane corso mix to me. 2 seems quite young for a large breed to have a litter as they would just be starting to fill out and mature. A breeder would not need to re-home mum permanently if not getting on with pups given they should all be going to new homes after 8wks. More likely that as the demand for puppies has dropped off the breeder doesn't want the cost of keeping mum now she's no longer a cash cow. May also have some health issues doesn't want to fund.

I hope your son has gone off the idea as none of them seem in the position to offer this poor dog what it needs even on a short term basis. It's not just the high basic costs, it's extremely difficult to find rented accomodation with a dog and expect at his age maybe limited by funds to houseshares and small flats and If he's going to be working in future he will likely need to pay for dog care on top of some point.

It's easy to have your heartstrings pulled and want to help but with poor set up and inexperience they'd probably struggle as the dogs likely to be unsettled by change and hormones, I doubt she's been well cared for/trained pet that greeder suggests so may need way more training input than they'd be expecting. Greeder will be happy and they will now be saddled with the costs & responsibility to re-home or potentially pts if can't.

If he is still keen to help then maybe try to focus his efforts towards finding a rescue that may take dog direct from breeder. Sadly rescues are drowning under the vast numbers of dogs/puppies people are wanting to relinquish or have dumped in the pounds (killed after 7days if no room keep longer or rescue to take) so can take much longer than it used to if not high risk to get a rescue space but means the dog can be rehomed properly and matched to suitable adopter with backup available if doesn't work out or circumstances change later in dogs lifetime.

Yes it's ridiculous and unfair. The dog won't know if it's coming or going and realistically there is a good chance it will end up being given up.

Sit him and his gf (and ideally friend) down and calmy worked through the budget - does he know how much insurance is and food, how much yearly vets annual bills and monthly flea/worming prevention is. Does he know how much one off dog bills can be, and the usual excess with insurance.

Is it a puppy or older dog - either way it probably won't be able to be left alone for a while. Have you asked them how they are going to be at home with it all the time, what they plan to do with it if they go out in the evening before it can get used to being alone. Do they know how much a dog boarder costs if they go away over night and have you made it clear you won't be stepping in.

Ask them about the breed, do they know the challenges with the particular breed. Ask what they plan to do if the dog has aggression issues etc, or isn't toilet trained, or who will pay/Fix things if it damages them (ie chewed furniture/scratched doors).

Have you explained how many dogs go to rescue and how unfair it would be unless they can all completely commit and understand how this is going to work for the next 10 years.

His gf and friend are enabling this so you ideally want to talk with them all. You only need to persuade one that this is a bad idea.

So has no job....how does he even support himself? He sounds like one of those boys who do nothing all day than hang out in drug gangs .. let me guess, he wears black joggies, black hoodie ajd carries a black bumbag too? And let me guess that the dog is probably not soke cute little spaniel or something and is a pit bull....only wanting it for his protection.
Not fair on the dog being shifted about his friends house and gf. Of course thus must be a joke thi cause why on earth ask us all something very obvious

He cannot afford it. If he is thinking of using a pet foodbank then the vast majority won’t take dogs that have been rescued recently.

He could be made homeless and will NOT get a reference for a new property if he wa kicked out because of the dog (by the way laws have changed and owning a pet isn’t a reason to deny someone accommodation but this is largely ignored and he’s alsrrady signed the contract).

If he’s on universal credit he will be job seeking and what is he going to do with the dog when he goes back to work? On holiday? Our for the night?

if the dog lives in an abandoned house you need to report to RSPCA - I would actually report this woman ASAP to them.

What happens with vet bills in an emergency? Insurance? Flea treatment? Worming tablets? Food? Bedding? Toys (this dog will need a lot of enrichment)? Walking?

Cane Corso for sure. Looks just like my boy. They need stability and focused training as they are very protective.
Bad idea on your sons part.

Hes supposed to be looking for work but doesn't seem to keep a job long when he gets one. He spends his days at his cousins business helping out. He sent me a message asking what pet insurance I have and not sure if he looking before getting the dog.. He just won't listen to me

As others have said, definitely a bad idea. At the very least, he needs a home where the dog csn live with him, and a steady income. Vet bills are VERY expensive. They are also inevitable, and insurance won't pay for everything - that's if he can afford that in the first place. A recent trip to the vet for a simple urine infection cost us just over £120, almost half his monthly income. Add on food, insurance, flea/worming etc and that's a huge chunk of his money gone. As someone else pointed out, it sounds like she will also need to be spayed.
Getting pets off Facebook is a whole other level of bad too. That's not a lab. She's beautiful but yes, agree it looks like a great dane mix, or lab cross boxer or similar. Who knows her history or behaviour. To not get on with her own puppies sounds like a fake excuse, or if it's true there are some major problems there.
Our 8 week old puppy (years ago) from Battersea Dogs' Home was dumped because 'she didn't get on with the owners's other dogs' and turned out to have a major heart defect, which was the real reason, costing my parents thousands.
Is he the kind of young man you can reason with? Why does he want a dog? Has he proven in the past he can look after animals or have any experience taking care or training a potentially difficult dog? I'm guessing the answer is no and he just wants it as a status symbol or because he believes it's all fun and games. Hopefully you can persuade him it's not and that the dog deserves better. When he's more mature, and better set up to provide, then he can get a dog.

Even if your DS can scrape together monthly pet insurance it definitely won't cover everything. My cat recently cost £2,800 as she had a partial bowel blockage. She is only covered up to £3,000 per individual claim so it goes to show if she'd been hit by a car & needed orthopaedic surgery/pins etc it definitely wouldn't have been enough. I had to pay £99 excess too & if the dog needs spaying they price that by weight of the dog. It will be hundreds of pounds & insurance don't cover things like that. I feel sorry for the dog - she'll be going from one bad situation straight into another. If your son truly loves animals he should do what's best for the dog and NOT what is best for him!

I absolutely agree with you. Can't come fast enough.

I’m more curious about the friend and GF offering to have it overnight? In what way is he looking after it at all? What happens when they’re all at work?

TBH ignore the stupidity of your son (sorry but it’s true) for a moment.

What sort of scum get rid of the mother dog for free? Oh yes, the sort that are keeping the puppies to sell at an extortionate price. Those puppies need a mother and the sort of scum that gets rid of the mother, for free, won’t be raising those puppies properly. That’s if there are puppies at all…

The only reasonable thing to do is call the RSPCA as all those dogs need rehoming.

And, once again, your son is an idiot. But if he wants to ‘buy’ the dog, let him - when it bites someone or destroys his house, it’ll be him who is blamed.

He is hardly going to be asking about pet insurance if he doesn't intend to get the dog.

You need to explain to him that yes wanting to rescue the dog is a lovely idea, but without a stable home and owner who can afford vet check ups etc. it's likely to be worse for the dog in the long term than simply being surrendered at a rescue where a suitable owner will be found.

Tell him you won't have anything to do with the dogs care as well, consciously or unconsciously he probably thinks you are his back up.

I’m sorry. Because it’s had puppies?! How old are these puppies? If they’re under 8 weeks that dog needs to stay with her babies! Sounds super dodgy!

you’re definitely not unreasonable though. He hasn’t thought this through at all.
you can’t have dogs in shared houses. Especially HMO’s. I think it’s actually against the law because allergies etc.
he doesn’t make enough to cover food, insurance, vet bills, insurance, flea/worm treatment, training. It’s expensive. Food & insurance costs us about £150-£200 a month alone. PLUS about £400 on pet care (it’ll drop once my daughter starts nursery & im back to work) because we have one who’s high energy and needs to burn it off..
maybe at least go to a pet shop, look at the decent more natural dog foods (things like bakers, pedigree, wag are complete rubbish) maybe ask a colleague for some advice on a good mid/range food.
then take him in, show him how much everything costs and ask him how he’ll basically pay for it if he’s not making that much money.

Dogs are expensive, insurance and food alone would swallow up the majority of that money. You can’t take on an animal that’s already been rehomed if you don’t have a stable place to live so you know it will not be rehomed again.

Poor bloody thing. He is in no position to get a dog, they cost a fortune to keep and aren't something you can just put down and pick up when you want. I have two working dogs, it is a constant round of feeding/exercising/training etc. they are actually more demanding in their needs than my 12 year old child!! 😂 but they are my choice to have, I chose to have them so I will do my best to meet their needs.

Or better still a cactus.