To think we should up the age of consent to 18?

[whatnet]

I just have this utterly sick feeling about the constant narrative pushed in the UK about a CHILD being ‘16’ and therefore, “what is your problem?”… “it’s ‘legal’” I am so sick of the exploitation of our girls in this country. Our CHILDREN. Our future. Who do not have a voice, because they are children. They need to be protected. I will pre empt some of your arguments. The UK government has classified the violence against Women and Girls as a “National Threat”

https://lordslibrary.parliament.uk/tackling-violence-against-women-and-girls-in-the-uk/

A 16 year old girl is a child and should be protected as a child, by law.

In Scotland it’s 16

From what I recall I was not interested in sex at 14, I was interested in romance. Holding hands and kissing was as far as my physical desires went. But perhaps I wasn’t a normal teen!

This is an excellent idea. We don't want to criminalise teenagers exploring, but we do need to crack down on adults exploiting children.

But if you change the law then legally they can't consent- therefore making it rape, if they're both underage then it would be other person committing the rape (even if under 18 themselves)

A better system would be 16-18 can sleep within that age group and then 18+ all age groups

This is partially correct for parts of the UK.
N Ireland and Scotland, the marriageable age, with parental consent, remains 16.
In Feb this year, the law changed to 18 for England and Wales.

No. 14 is 'first sexual experience' which includes kissing, touching etc.

16/17 is average for intercourse in the UK.

KvotheTheBloodless

I was 13 and he was in his late 20's and a youth group leader.

I don’t agree. The age of consent will do little to protect young girls from being exploited by older men. My son was 18 before he started having sex and I was glad, my daughter is 15 and isn’t having sex yet. I do view her as being mature enough to make decisions about that really, and whilst no-one wants to think about their daughter having sex I’d have no objections if she got a boyfriend soon after 16 and felt it was the right time to have sex. Of course I’d have an issue if she started dating a 30yr old guy, and I’d certainly discourage it. It might stop a few men having sex with young girls but many don’t really care what age they are, not the type of men wanting to sleep with 16yr old girls when they are 30.

100% disagree. I grew up in a system with 18 as age of consent... it never worked !! It just criminalised human instincts & widely was impossible to enforce. I always thought 16 in England was a good balance between SGding and respecting biology, social nature, etc.

Discussing RB yesterday I came to the conclusion that you would have to put an age difference rule in, so

Under 25 maximum 3 years age difference...

This would solve a lot of problems.

I actually work in CSE and ASE and don't really agree with you, though I do completely understand your concerns.

Personally I think the best bet would be to make it illegal for anyone over the age of 18 to have sex with a 16 or 17 year old. I don't see anything wrong with 16 year olds having sex with each other or teens a year older. So long as they are taught about sex from a young age and how to be safe, learn about consent etc, it shouldn't be an issue.

I lost my virginity at 15 and I was absolutely ready - nothing and I mean nothing would have stopped me. Completely banning something often causes more harm than good. Education is key. From both parents and schools. Having open discussions about sex in an age appropriate way from young is far more beneficial than telling a bunch of teenagers they can't have sex until they are adults.

Working in the sexual exploitation field, I often see young people who are exploited and the vast majority of these are from homes where sex was never discussed (I.e strict religious or cultural aspects etc) or from abusive homes. Raising the age of consent to 18 we would do absolutely nothing to protect these victims - however tackling the problem at the source, would go a long way.

So op, you would really like it to be 21 but are softening us up with 18 as a starting point?

Do you like sex?

I was randy as hell from 14 and masturbating multiple times a day. Despite the poster name I am female in case you wondered.

I do wonder if some posters just don't have the experience of a sex drive in teenage years, merrily consigning 17 year olds to hardcore online porn for the first four to five years of their sexual urges, then expecting them to be capable of more vanilla, nice, sex with a partner at 18. Because let's face it ... that's what all the boys at least will turn to. And some girls.

I was really happy for all my kids when they entered loving first relationships aged 16-18 where they could experiment together and hopefully have sex positive experiences.

I don't have an issue at all with a Romeo-Juliet style age gap clause, it's a good idea. But what planet some of you are on with your no sex before 18 rule, I have no idea.

I voted YABU because you appear to give zero thought to the exploitation of boys.

I would support a Romeo and Juliet type law.

My BF was 16, her " boyfriend " worked at the school and was 39. He groomed her for months. We are both in.our 50s now and she is in therapy because of this. The fact that it was legal then and still technically legal now appals me.

I have long thought about this. 16 seems young and girls are often pressured by "pushy" boyfriends of their own age too.Older men seem to have an advantage with young girls ,and have power and money to spend .I would say up to 18 and maybe a age difference of say up to 21 for a partner . Probably wont happen though as pale male and stale men seem to be in charge sadly .And seem to think they should control womens bodies ,from comments about our appearance and esp our weight ,(An easy target).

So what happens in a couple where they are 16 & 17 (and can legally have sex?) but then a year later when they're 17 & 18, they can't?

Or have I misunderstood?

I think a reasonable rule would be that if someone is under 18, they can sleep with someone who is up to 2 years older than them. So an 18 year old could sleep with a 16 year old, and a 19 year old could sleep with a 17 year old.

Not in Scotland its not, they are also trying to push voting down to 16 while pushing cigarettes up to 18. But you can change gender without parents knowing at any age.

Very cynical about all of it. But it still doesn't make sense to push age of concent up.
Does the age of concent really matter to most teens?
The men who are going to exploit young adults will do it regardless of age.

The age of consent in Scotland is 16. At 16 you can also vote in Scottish elections, leave school and be prosecuted on court.

Not sure what the English equivalent ages are.

You can't get married at 16 in England and Wales any more. The Government raised the age to 18 and it kicked in earlier this year. You can still marry at 16 in Scotland though.

I'd support it.

But to protect girls and boys. Boys are exploited and abused too but it's often seen as not as bad because of course teen boys are all desperate for sex and having that with an older woman or man is just good luck for them. 🙄

It would make more sense imo, if you’re going down that route, to adopt a Romeo and Juliet law, a close in age exemption.

This is a very good idea

You just keep it simple and say 16yo and 17yos can only consent with other 16yo and 17yos.

Many places do this already.

No need to complicate it with tiers.

I have been saying this for ages. Society has changed. Once upon a time a child left school at 12 and was off to work. I know of people who were living in beds it’s alone when they were 14 and that was in the 60s. It was not unusual for people to be married at 16 until relatively recently. But times have changed and there is a split in society about where adulthood starts. Children are kept now in education until 18, they can’t drink until 18 nor vote nor even get married anymore. They can however consent to radical life changing drugs and surgery before then plus have sex but only with other 16 or 17 year olds as anyone older it would be publicly deemed grooming or abuse of power. Raising the age of all adult decisions to 18 would solve the problem. It would also prevent some teenagers from losing their virginity at 14/15 as I expect no one would be willing to break the law by 4 years. Those who want to do it earlier will do it any for sure, but it will prevent cases such as RB from being possible without obvious criminality rather than it being a moral issue where people fall on different sides of the debate.

The problem with that I guess if you'd have couples who can legally sleep with each other when they're both 17, and then say one turns 18 6 months before the other, you have 6 months where they can't have sex despite the fact that previously it was legal. They could have been having legal sex for a year, and then one turns 18 and it's suddenly illegal again.

Having a rule that you can sleep with someone X years older than you would get round that.