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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Should we move from London to Stroud?

54 replies

CactusMactus · 18/09/2023 17:17

My partner of 16 years wants us to move to Stroud... We currently live in London as do most of my family. A lot of our friends have left london over the years but we have a great community of neighbours.
I have never lived in the countryside neither have our kids 8 & 10! I'm sure it's lovely but I feel like life would be totally different and that there is no coming back... part of the reason would be to sell our spendy London house and buy something cheaper so we might, just be able to pay off our mortgage before we die!

Also, London secondary schools (near us) are a bit rough. I went to a London secondary school in a pretty decent area and it was chaos....
AIBU to be scared as hell?

OP posts:
Mirabai · 18/09/2023 17:19

Stroud is a very small. Cheltenham is nicer if you’re used to London.

Vegetus · 18/09/2023 17:39

Stroud is a horrible hilly place full of weirdos! However the Saturday farmers market is great and there's a place in the shopping centre bit that does incredible burritos...

They're probably not worth moving for though.

insideoutandupsidedown · 18/09/2023 17:53

Moved from London 22 years ago to a village in sussex when kids were same age. We have paid off mortgage. Kids went to a lively village school, good local comp and then to Sussex, Exeter and Reading Unis.. life does not end when you leave London !

Village life was brilliant. Brownies, Guides, free tennis courts, paddle boarding on the river. Great community if you get involved it's east to make friends.

Downside . V few. Except being organised about shopping /ordering a shop. PITA to drive to the shop for a pint of milk but you get sorted with a few pints in the freezer after a couple of months.

Tip for teenage years .. teach them to drive the moment they are 17. Keep price down by getting starter lessons and practicing with them. Otherwise you will be a late night taxi service. ! (and first year insurance easier to manage with no/lower mortgage!)

onlyk · 18/09/2023 18:02

I grew up in Stroud, then spent over 20 years in London moved back to Cheltenham (town near stroud). If you’re used to living in London I’d recommend Cheltenham rather than Stroud as it has bars and restaurants whereas Stroud doesn’t have that many. There’s a good selection of schools in Cheltenham but would recommend checking them out to see what would suit your children.

Stroud is a very small town with fewer amenities and a bit alternative (or as my ex would say a brunch of hippies).

MrsMoastyToasty · 18/09/2023 18:05

Stroud is a town. Not a hamlet of half a dozen houses.

Fightyouforthatpie · 18/09/2023 18:06

Don't move out of London under any circumstances.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 18/09/2023 18:07

Have you checked any Stroud secondaries- because I wouldn’t assume they’re better just because they aren’t London.

I wouldn’t move from
family.

and once you move from London you won’t be able to afford to move back.

Thepeopleversuswork · 18/09/2023 18:19

You’ll get two different lines of argument here:

One group of people will tell you London is a shithole and how grateful they are to have found green space and fresh air and cheaper property.

Another group will tell you the countryside is dull and people are inward looking and a bit hostile to people they haven’t already known for the past 30 years and that there’s no good bars and shops and everyone is white.

Like most of these things there’s some truth in both these arguments but they are exaggerated. The trick is to figure out which of these imperatives in the most important for you.

I have to say though that Stroud is pretty small and quiet and you can probably find somewhere in that region which is less of a culture shock. I think you will find it very slow if you’re used to London.

TiredCatLady · 18/09/2023 18:23

Have you actually spent any time in Stroud? It wouldn’t be my pick of places to live in the South West and as PP have suggested, don’t assume the secondary schools are any better than London.
Public transport isn’t great (the train to Bristol is 90 minutes for example, even to Cheltenham it can be 40 minutes) so factor in as the DC get older or when you want to visit family/have them visit you.

LovedmyRaleighChopper · 18/09/2023 19:00

Stroud is a great place to live. We lived there for 6 years and loved it twenty years ago. Only child at that time went to Rodborough which was a lovely primary. We left before secondary but some of them were a bit dicey. Lovely welcoming friendly people, big pub culture but a lot of drugs around. Maybe that’s the same everywhere now? Loads of things for youngsters, brownies, riding lessons, sports but less for teenagers when they start needing transport to Gloucester or Cheltenham. Eclectic and interesting housing stock and some of the most breathtaking countryside you’ll ever see. The views from Rodborough common are stunning and there’s a lot of very decent safe cycling by the canals or on the converted railway lines for sporty kids. Very easy to make friends as Stroudies are very sociable people. One of the first organic and local food markets in the country-sustainability is a big thing! I’d go down and stay for a few weekends, see what you think!

itsmyp4rty · 18/09/2023 19:16

Why not Bristol if you want to avoid the culture shock a bit? Personally I'd do anything to move out of London, 3 years there was more than enough, but I'm not a city girl.

Cotswoldmama · 18/09/2023 19:26

I love Stroud I feel like you have the benefits of town and country living especially if you live in or close to the centre. I would recommend Slad, rodborough and old Stroud. We live in the centre and my kids go to the school a few mins from the centre and half of their classes are families that have moved to Stroud from London. That's part of what I like about Stroud. The mix of backgrounds. On the edges it's not like that at all a bit more like 'This country'!
I grew up in Stroud from the age of 12 and loved it. I always lived quite centrally so could walk to town etc to socialise. My dad lived in London my friends and I would get trains there or go to Gloucester or Cheltenham for nights out.

turkeyboots · 18/09/2023 19:26

Stroud is Grammar school territory. And the comp had a poor reputation when I last heard. That would be a deal breaker for me

LlynTegid · 18/09/2023 19:38

Stroud is not a typical shire town. I would venture it is one of the most Marmite communities outside London.

topshotta · 18/09/2023 19:50

God no

Tenashelflife · 18/09/2023 19:54

It depends what you want. Stroud is seen in many circles as a trendy, cool place to live. A bit like Froome. I personally really like it as it's got a lot going on - very arty and lots of live music. But if you're the type of person that wants quaint Cotswold village - Stroud ain't it. It's far from perfect as there is a drugs problem and the schools are hit and miss (great if your kids get into the grammars, terrible if they don't). Oh, and the grammar schools aren't like the ones you get elsewhere like Gloucester which are really easy to get in but are super selective so you need to coach your kids from a young age.
The other thing about Stroud is that it is full of people who used to live party lives in Bristol, Peckham, Brixton etc but decided to settle down in Stroud. Again, I quite like that but many people might not.

Barleymilk · 18/09/2023 20:55

I travel down to Stroud every year to stay with a friend and we go to the goodwill evening held beginning of December.
It has a very different vibe to my local town in the midlands, a real friendly,hippy sort of feel,lots of toddlers in slings I noticed and women in cord dungarees. I think I'd have enjoyed being brought up there,it just seems chilled.
The next day we spent time in Cirencester and it was worlds apart,despite up the road.

FinallyPeakedNow · 18/09/2023 21:03

I want to know who told London about Stroud because about 85% of the people I meet who have just moved here have come from there. The other 15 come from Bristol

gogomoto · 18/09/2023 21:06

Stroud is quite nice but saw drugs being sold openly when I last went (Saturday daytime) I also prefer to be near water.

Pizzapie22 · 18/09/2023 21:09

No Stroud has a weird vibe I’d guess it’s on lay lines and attracts a lot of ‘green’ weirdos.

I think a lot of people from London choose Cheltenham or some of the nicer Cotswold villages.

Awaywiththewhisk · 18/09/2023 21:15

Pizzapie22 · 18/09/2023 21:09

No Stroud has a weird vibe I’d guess it’s on lay lines and attracts a lot of ‘green’ weirdos.

I think a lot of people from London choose Cheltenham or some of the nicer Cotswold villages.

Wow that is soooo funny @Pizzapie22 I had JUST written out ‘weird vibe’ and scrolled back up the thread.

I share your opinion. Absolutely hated it. Would rather be in a litter-strewn former industrial ghost town. It’s a horrible place.
No one wanted to give directions, no coffee shops .. urgh.
Just something wrong with the atmosphere.

CactusMactus · 18/09/2023 21:19

I know I sound daft as a brush - but no, I have not visited yet. We are planning to go for a weekend soon. But a feel like a weekend break is quite different from real life... So it's great to hear from people who have / do live there.
I have heard such a mixed bag.. I like the sound of Stroud being a bit alternative and artsy. Less so the drugs and dungarees.
I think next step is research schools and plan a weekend... any tips?

OP posts:
IthinkIamAnAlien · 18/09/2023 21:22

We moved to Stroud nearly 10 years ago from London originally but spent our years bringing up children in Oxford. We had to stay in an Airbnb for a month when we moved and the owner of the house and Airbnb was sarcastic about the town and said the Saturday market was fine but in the week, the place was full of hobgoblins. It seemed very snobby but I see what she meant now!

The Saturday market is amazing, full of organic veg stalls, food stalls as well as pricey honey, cheese, chutneys and so on. The rest of the week, the town closes at 5 pm, the bigger stores, Peacocks, M&M, Poundshop, Wilko, Halfords are gone or going and there are now dozens of coffee shops which causes a lot of bitching. As for the shock, horror when Starbucks came, you have to laugh!

The schools are mixed as people are saying, the grammar schools are much sought after. The GP surgeries are very over subscribed and NHS dentists are unobtainable. You'll be fine if you can afford to go private. House prices are extortionate and houses sell quickly even now.

As former city folk, we are often bored now (yes, there's a music scene, pubs, a fair amount of art and culture, often over subscribed and crowded) and we joke about using Bristol as a bit of light relief and a sense of freedom!!

The countryside is gorgeous but the cycling is actually limited if you want to avoid the local roads teeming with traffic. I wouldn't cycle here with kids, there's just the canal towpath and a 3 mile, off road cycle track from Stroud to Nailsworth. The local leisure centre is not very good, you have to book well in advance, the pool is small and always overcrowded, it's very disappointing.

We tried to move back to Oxford recently and couldn't afford it!! Think carefully OP and maybe make a few visits. It's a small town with all you would expect in a small town!

Justmeandthem · 18/09/2023 21:24

We moved from London to Stroud and lasted 9 months before we moved back to London 😅

Awaywiththewhisk · 18/09/2023 21:30

hobgoblins 😂 That’s the impression I got .. I just felt, in the atmosphere, that somehow everyone there was compromising. They didn’t really want to be there, didn’t feel as though they were getting on with it .. felt in limbo.

Hard to put into words. It was creepy that’s all.