Have three sinlaws, get along great with two, kids all get along and often meet up to vent about our in laws amongst general chit chat and just because we enjoy each others company. Third sinlaw is dh sister and somewhat socially awkward(?). She didn’t speak to me for the first 7 years, her own dad said she was just jealous of us because we were happy and she went from one loser bf to another. I tried to ignore it, trying killing it with kindness but eventually just got over trying. She had her first kid then that was it, suddenly she seemed a bit more interested in speaking to me and took a lot of baby paraphernalia from us. Thing is, I don’t need to be her friend but my in laws are constantly moaning about us not inviting her anywhere- but she rarely speaks to the other two or myself unless it’s about herself and it’s just tense with her there. Her and her bf don’t invite us anywhere or make an effort to ask about the kids or us yet we’re expected to invite her on weekends away that we organised between us, because they think we’re leaving her out- she leaves herself out! She’s been invited to days out and has refused, she turns up late if she does come and then will keep her distance so it doesn’t even feel like she enjoys it herself?! I feel it’s just too little too late to have the same relationship that the rest of us have, to the point where I feel awkward if we happen to be altogether at in-laws house for example. I don’t mind her but as far as I’m concerned, she’s had numerous chances to make an effort and she just doesn’t. I do feel for her in a way, but it just feels like my in-laws are forcing her on us a bit. It’s made a bit more tense as her ds is very bitey, pushy and generally terrorises the rest of the kids and they don’t like his behaviour towards them. I wouldn’t not invite her for that alone, but equally I don’t want to make the other kids and sinlaws uncomfortable by just inviting her everywhere. I thought this ‘leaving her out’ rubbish was over in school!!