AIBU to think that the AIBU thread seems to bring out the worst in people on mumsnet?

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....and i think as interesting as it is, i might actually never go on this thread again.
In other threads, people are mostly helpful and supportive of other mums, giving some good advice or even try to have a laugh. The other threads seem to bring out the best in people. The support i got here when i was a new mum facing the horrors of those first few weeks really helped me through that period.

But in the AIBU thread over the last few weeks, i have essentially been labelled selfish, thick, a fuckwit, accused of not loving my children enough, not wanting to spend time with them -- i.e. an overall bad parent and bad person with no consideration for others.

And all because I work full time, employ a nanny, own a 4x4. If i admitted that we will probably send the kids to private school (no AIBU thread on that recently), i am sure i will be eternally damned.

So goodbye AIBU thread, it was fun for a while, but all this negativity is not good for one's soul. If i was having a low day, i might actually believe what other people say and that would be tragic.

were gonna miss ya

Ohh what was your AIBU thread? Posting in here does somewhat open people to critisism if they are indeed being unreasonable, I certainly wouldn't have the guts to post a thread of my own in here.

yes i agree it does

I would never post in there unless it was a light-hearted/jokey one (i.e everyone knows you are being unreasonable)

From what I've seen simply asking the question 'AIBU?' gives people the opportunity to let rip at you!

take the word 'in' out of the thread title and you might have a point

AIBU is not the place for serious threads looking for support, IMO.

I agree in general if you ask the question AIBU then you will get answered, in the beautifully blunt style of mn.

I think it goes most pete tong when the ops actually don't want an answer. Once again I call for a INAR thread (copywrite Hecate) for ranting.

Interesting a great ABIU thread was when the OP realised she was BU and changed her mind, very funny and worthwhile.

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I like posting AIBU threads because you're more likely to get an honest opinion.
But you do have to be prepared for peopel to totaly disagree, like my Easter Bunny thread yesterday, I still find some of the answers laughable, but I asked, so I got told, that's the way it goes.
If you feel genuinely hurt by someone or something then it's best not to post in AIBU.

but Page63 there is always the possibility that you are an overall bad parent and bad person with no consideration for others - though to be fair I don;t think you're thick

AIBU is relaly an invitation to a bear baiting contest debate, what we *really need is a "please give me some honest and constructive advice" topic (PGMSHACA doesn;t have the same ring thoguh does it?)

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aibu does seem to bring out the worst in people.
It's permission to vent isn't it?

Surely when you post on AIBU you either
A) are convinced you're not so would have an answer to anyones disagreements, or
B) Are really not sure so want peopels honest opinions?

the aibu is an usuallly an oppurtunity to all delve in, give a verbal pasting and berate someone for their shortcomings or aibu

I dunno. I remember using it once to ask if it would be ok for my sensible 7yo dd to let herself in at home after school (2 metres down the road) for half an hour until I got home.

Most of the opinions were no. None of them were really that judgy and in the end I decided that it was asking too much of dd and so I had to find alternative arrangements. But I found it a helpful thread.

The problem lies when you post on an AIBU topic and you expect others to agree with you. Most of the posts on these topics are usually quite opinionated and so of course you are going to get very different opinions back.

I think Mumsnet should put in a reminder saying that not everyone will share your opinion and if you aren't prepared to debate your viewpoint you should reconsider your post.

Rhubarb is that the MN equivalent of "the value of your investments may go down as well as up"?!

I always thought/expected that AIBU threads are just a 'free for all' with regard to slating others i read some of them but they often get too heated for me to post or i'm too late on the 'good' ones and then they get deleated

agree though that some things do get out of hand especially when it is an insensitive OP or just someone who's bored and trying to get a rise out of people

Sure is kewcumber!

I was just about to post what Rhubarb has already said. If you post with a view to consider the advice offered then it's fine but don't ask the question in the first place if you don't want to be told you are being unreasonable.

ooh i love 'em!! Have started a few, got slated and change my mind to realise i was wrong!

If I dont want people given their tuppence worth then i will start the thread in CHAT instead.

But as you've gone I suppose i am talking to an empty chair

AIBU to think i have just wasted my time??

I LUV AIBU threads. It gives you a chance to support people who think like you do...and ignore the ones who don't...or slag them off.

Whichever way, it makes for entertaining reading and maybe I'm twisted, but will keep posting on them and reading them until my head drops off.

I agree it does. A few times i have posted here I've been ripped apart by a pack of wolves after asking a perfectly reasonable question

Ah, what is reasonable to you is unreasonable to someone else! If you post on the AIBU threads you surely should know that.

Not an excuse to rip someone apart, but you do tend to get 2 extreme points of view competing for space on one thread.

Just look at the 4x4 thread to see a classic example of 2 very different points of view not living together in harmony. Bad choice of thread title there though.

I can only assume that Chequers' comment was to me - I personally don't feel I've ever had a question that starts 'AIBU', obviously I wouldn't think I was being unreasonable in thinking it, otherwise I wouldn't think it in the first place. OR, if I did think I was being unreasonable I certainly wouldn't put it on here for the wolves to pick at, I already know i'm being unreasonable!

I hadn't realised you had to post an AIBU thread before being allowed to answer others. I haven't got a child yet either, does this mean that I can't go on mumsnet because I'm not qualified to read the topics?

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