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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put house on the market immediately

38 replies

ManchesterLu · 15/09/2023 16:50

This morning as I was leaving the house, I walked through a spider's web that'd been made across my front door frame, and found the spider (a bloody massive one, and I'm not one to exaggerate spider size) on my leg. Screamed, nearly wet myself, flicked it off with my keys, thought no more of it. Problem solved, cleaned the web off the door.

Just now I went outside to the bin and IT HAPPENED AGAIN. It'd remade its web and I walked through it, leaving it proud sat on my BARE ARM.

I screamed (again - I'm not a screamer, but honestly it was horrible) and flicked it off with my hand this time as I had no keys.

I now have goosebumps that won't go away and I keep 'feeling' it walking on me, even though there's nothing there.

I either have to always use the back door and leave the house that way from now on, or move. Because I feel like it's made its home and will keep rebuilding every time I destroy it.

AIBU to just sell the house, or even burn it down?

(Disclaimer: This is of course lighthearted, I'm not a wimp - though I prefer them not to be on me - and of course I'm not really going to move).

OP posts:
Motomum23 · 15/09/2023 16:52

Deathlac is your friend!

Thisisthedawningoftheageofaquarius · 15/09/2023 16:53

You are tough as nails; after the first time I dunno if I’d ever go back!!!
imho it’s either him or you; and you best believe it ain’t gonna be you… I saw a recommendation of a raid spray that will kill the b*stard so I don’t think you should go home til you get that. Or else burn down the house - obvs 👍😂

hairyunicorn · 15/09/2023 16:55

I think you should burn the house down... Just to be on the safe side!

Speedygonzales78 · 15/09/2023 16:57

I use a garden cane to whip away the ones across from a bush and the car! Use your sweeping brush everytime you open the door 😆

Original poster
ManchesterLu · 15/09/2023 17:11

Thisisthedawningoftheageofaquarius · 15/09/2023 16:53

You are tough as nails; after the first time I dunno if I’d ever go back!!!
imho it’s either him or you; and you best believe it ain’t gonna be you… I saw a recommendation of a raid spray that will kill the b*stard so I don’t think you should go home til you get that. Or else burn down the house - obvs 👍😂

I did consider just living in the car, but my partner persuaded me it's not a long term viable solution :(

OP posts:
Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 15/09/2023 17:14

A strong solution of washing up liquid and water in a spray bottle will sort him out.

pigsDOfly · 15/09/2023 17:25

I had the same thing with my front door.

Every time I left the house I'd walk straight into a damn great web. Fortunately, the spider remained clinging onto the top of the porch and didn't land on me.

The stupid thing was every time it happened I'd forget about it until the next time.

Eventually, my brain caught up and I caught him in my spider glass, kept especially for spiders catching, and took him a few yards away and deposited him there.

I think he's the spider that's now living on the hedge at the front of the house but at least he's not above my head when I leave the house any more.

They're everywhere. PP's suggestion of a garden cane waved around in front of you is a really good idea. I tend to wave my arms around but suspect that not really going to help if I hit a large web.

Original poster
ManchesterLu · 15/09/2023 17:27

pigsDOfly · 15/09/2023 17:25

I had the same thing with my front door.

Every time I left the house I'd walk straight into a damn great web. Fortunately, the spider remained clinging onto the top of the porch and didn't land on me.

The stupid thing was every time it happened I'd forget about it until the next time.

Eventually, my brain caught up and I caught him in my spider glass, kept especially for spiders catching, and took him a few yards away and deposited him there.

I think he's the spider that's now living on the hedge at the front of the house but at least he's not above my head when I leave the house any more.

They're everywhere. PP's suggestion of a garden cane waved around in front of you is a really good idea. I tend to wave my arms around but suspect that not really going to help if I hit a large web.

Just added relocation of unwanted guest to DP's list of 'man tasks' (i.e. a list of tasks that I, a fully grown woman and supporter of equal rights, very much don't want to do).

OP posts:
Georgyporky · 15/09/2023 17:28

Cane & spider glass won't cure the problem, a hand-held vacuum cleaner will.

FeatherBlack · 15/09/2023 17:29

Yeah, I wouldnt waste any time
Burn the house down...

DuranNotSpandeau · 15/09/2023 17:33

Aww don't make it homeless! I'm scared of spiders and we've had one start to make a massive Web across our path about two weeks ago that I almost walked straight into.

I gently snapped the two strands going across the path so his web was still intact but sort of flapping about in the breeze, and after three days of me doing that he then made it between two bushes on the same side of the path. I thought it was awesome that he'd adapted to doing that after I'd been having to snap the strands going across the path twice a day.

Incywincywoo · 15/09/2023 17:37

It’s spider mating season, once they stop being horny they’ll bugger off.

DrFoxtrot · 15/09/2023 17:41

I have the same problem with my back door and the passage to the bins - multiple webs to fight through like Indiana Jones! I've taken to sweeping my way with a stick first, whether I can see them or not. Having the web on you is horrible, you can feel it but sometimes can't see it and it's difficult to remove!

Chypre · 15/09/2023 17:46

Take a nice stroll somewhere in the wide open, like a seaside, to blow off the cobwebs and such!

spiderlight · 15/09/2023 17:50

Sympathy! We have one that keeps making a web right across the front of our bins. I walked through it twice last week, and came into the house wearing the spider as a hair accessory the second time. I now approach the bins in the style of the Ministry of Silly Walks to break them with my feet rather than my face. I dread to think what the neighbours make of it.

AncientSpinningWheel · 15/09/2023 17:56

Send the dc out the door first. Surely this is why we have them?

RaininSummer · 15/09/2023 17:56

Please don't be awful and harm the poor thing.

gavisconismyfriend · 15/09/2023 17:57

Can you borrow a dog that will come and eat it? Ours loves a spicy spidery snack!

Hana89 · 15/09/2023 18:05

I think it is unreasonable to sell the house. If you do the spider could strike again and it could happen to someone else! Obviously the only reasonable step is to evacuate your family, pets, and most treasured possessions and then burn the house down.

MummyDummyNow · 15/09/2023 18:10

It's his house now. You must move out.

MothralovesGojira · 15/09/2023 18:13

DP says either:

  1. Burn your house down leaving spider to occupy the smoking ash and ruin;
  2. Catch the spider in a jar, transport it 5 miles away and set it free in someone else's front garden;
  3. Sell your house immediately but bear in mind that you will need to declare the spider as an anti-social neighbour on the sale declaration forms;
F1ymetothetoon · 15/09/2023 18:13

Oh god I get this in the passage where the bins are so I've taken to wildly waving whatever I'm taking to the bins at arms length to break the webs - I bloody hate this time of year 🕷️

tealady · 15/09/2023 18:14

Eeek poor you thats made me shudder! On the Jeremy Vine show yesterday the spider 'expert' was suggesting spraying peppermint oil as a good deterrent.

DisquietintheRanks · 15/09/2023 18:14

Can you imagine Spider Mumsnet?

The fucker destroyed my home not once but twice! AIBU to put her under the patio?

Medusaismyhero · 15/09/2023 18:18

Sorry to all the "don't hurt them" mumsnetters, but my Summer fly zapper becomes my Autumn spider electrocuter.

I refuse to apologise for this. And yes, I know spiders kill flies but I'm not letting a big ugly hairy bugger live in my house from September this year until next May just to kill next season's flies. Zapper it is.

I do save bees though - I carried one around Dublin zoo on my jacket for ages in July till we could find some sugary pop for him.

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