To search for a small dog that can be left alone during the day?

[PleasedToBeAFlower]

I will accept it if I get flamed by dog lovers for this.
But is there such a thing as a small dog that can be left alone for 5 or 6 hours 3 days a week?
Or is it just completely unacceptable to plan to do this?
My DD aged 9 has a significant educational learning delay. This is affecting her self esteem and self confidence. She is otherwise highly intelligent.
So I need to chanel in to things she loves, so that she can feel good about things she loves and is good at, to compensate for spending all day at school feeling rubbish about herself for not being able to learn.
And boy oh boy does she LOVE dogs. She literally adores them. She cannot pass one without making friends with it. Dogs seem attracted to her. And she's amaaaaazing with them. All breeds, all ages, doesn't matter, she adores them and they do seem to adore her.
She has begged for a dog for 6 years so far. I've always said no.
But I actually think it would be incredible for her to have one.
I have no doubt she would be 100% committed to it, and it would be a lucky dog as she would love it and care for it so much.
BUT it would be alone in the house 3 days a week for about 6 hours a day.
No way round this.
Kids at school.
DH and I go to work, and we dont have jobs that we can take dogs to.
Is this ever, ever, ever do-able???
Or is there never a way to have a dog if it's left on its own?
I realise it has to be fair on the dog, not just what we want.

Yes that is true, a dog is full on. If you realise this beforehand and still want to, there is no reason why you shouldnt.
Cocker spaniels are a way of life, I must say. They are do intelligent, they need consistency and clear directions and upbringing, otherwise they take over. They sit on the couch and you will sit on the floor. Haha. But because of this they also are very empathetic and find you when you're said or down. Biggest love I ever found.

Fair enough, that's your opinion, but I honestly disagree.

Leaving a dog alone for 6 hours twice a week is not going to do a well adjusted dog any harm.

A dog under six months would need a dog sitter to break up the day, an adult dog would be fine. I would much rather see a dog in a loving home environment, than in a rescue where it is kennelled for the vast majority of its day.

Dogs are being euthanised because there is no where to place them, I am certain that a loving home where the dog has to be left a couple of times a week is preferable.

I do have a dog, a dog that has no problem being left alone for reasonable amounts of time. No separation anxiety, no destructive behaviours, just a well balanced dog that is happy to potter around when we're not home.

Pick the right dog OP and you won't have a problem, look for breeds that have "independence" as a trait. Don't go for the dog that is all over you at a rescue, go for the calm dog that plods over to say "hello" but isn't acting like their life depends on you giving them attention. They are the dogs which can be dismissed as they seem less "interested" in people, but they are the kind of dog you want.

Most dogs I know would be too, but not from the start so I'd say factoring in the cost and commitment of a dog walker/daycare at least initially very much is necessary. I'm surprised that as a dog walker yourself you don't agree.

I did say upthread that OP's scenario would only suit a settled adult dog.

Of course you can - people up and down the country leave their dogs alone while they go to work.

MN is incredibly weird when it comes to dogs - people either hate them and are terrified of them if they bark, or think that anyone who wants a dog needs to spend thousands of pounds a year on daycare.

Meanwhile, back in reality, people go to work, kids go to school, people go on days out and the dogs are quite happy.

You're not in the position to get a dog.

My family owned dogs my entire life and we would never leave a dog in the house alone regularly for 6 hours a time. Each to their own but I don’t see this fair.

Would you have left your child alone, no. I don't understand why people get a dog to leave at home on own. They bark all day causing noise nuisance for others. It should be considered animal abuse. If you can't be there to actually look after it , then no.

I think the "I can't leave my dog on its own" thing says more about the human than the dog.

A bit like "I never got to go to the loo on my own until my children were at school" type thing. I never ever took my son to the loo with me unless we were out somewhere!

People need to be needed.

They bark all day regardless of whether someone is at home or not. It would drive me potty!

Thank you for that!

Of course I know it's me and DH that would be fully responsible and accountable for looking after a dog.
Do you honestly think I'm expecting a 9 year old to take on the responsibility of independently meeting the care and welfare needs of a dog?

This little guy ! No vet bills, no problem at home alone, no dog poo, no walkies, no ripping faces off, just wants to play

I have reported you.

So agree. I sometimes wonder if MN over estimates the intelligence of dogs. I love them . I have 3. But my lab/shepherd will greet me with the same amount of ridiculous loving excitable yipping if I've been gone for 5 minutes or 5 hours. It's not like they can tell the time!
Buy a healthy ( non-puppy farmed dog) and you will be fine OP. Train them as well as you can ( maybe with a trainer if you are worried ) and treat them with lots of love and affection. The 18 hours a week you are away will make no difference. A dog walker is a good idea but not really necessary. Walking dogs for ages in the UK seems to be a big thing. A wander around the block is fine in the rest of the world.
Most dogs sleep at least 12 hours a day.
I wouldn't get a puppy in your situation - aim for a 2 year old. Cavvies are a bit needy , but you could get 2 and they'd be fine. Havanese , whippets, Basenjis, Greyhounds ( not small but quiet and lazy) ; a good old mutt from a rescue. All good options. And don't discount a labrador. The easiest , friendliest, most chilled out dog in the world IME. Just DO NOT GET A LABRADOR PUPPY if you don't want most of the things you own ( including your walls to be destroyed). I think a 2-3 yo lab would be perfect for you but feel free to ignore me.

Good luck.

Thank you to everyone who has provided polite and well balanced answers to my post.
It has been really interesting to read all of your responses.
I am taking on board all of the sound advice given, including the points made against getting a dog as well as the supportive posts.
It's an enormous, life changing decision, so I want to ensure I get it right.
For the record, I think some posters missed my update saying it's 2 days a week at a maximum of 6 hours each day, not 3 days a week, although I accept this makes no relevance to some posters.
On these 2 days, the dog would have a good walk in the morning and 2 hours of family company and interaction, then stay home without a family member for 6 hours (maximum), then after that get taken straight out for a big run around in the fields, played with and interacted with whilst out on the run, we'd be out walking with it for more than an hour, come home, then DH or I would take it for another walk before bed. Rain or shine.
On the other 5 days a week it would be with us.

Even with your clarification, I do not think you should get a dog. Much as I realise you will be missing out on something that will give you a lot.

Thank you - it's 12 hours a week. 2 days a week, 6 hours maximum each day.
It's my fault for the confusion I'm afraid - I accidentally typed 3 instead of 2 in my OP (I'm always hitting the button next to the one I'm meant to hit when I'm typing on my mobile!)

So are you saying that no-one should have a dog unless there is someone at home with them all day every day? Or are you saying that dogs can be left, but gor much shorter periods of time?
Are you saying people who go out to work cannot have a dog?
I'm not being facetious here, I promise. I genuinely want to know if this is what you are saying.

A dog is not the same as a child FFS. Why would they have nothing to do? I assume OP will give them toys, food and water - they've already said they'd get a dog flap.

Why won’t you get a dog Walker?

If you do get a dog

1. How will you know its OK on its own for those times and not distressed

1. What will you do if its not OK?

I'm not saying I won't.
Why are you assuming I won't?

I think with a dog walker and a dog that is already used to being home alone for a few hours I think you will be OK after a couple of weeks of it living with you and you building up its tolerance to being home alone in a new place.

I don't think the plan of walking it, then letting it be with you for 2 hours and then leave it for 6 hours is great. That way it's without access to the outside for 8 hours. You should walk it just before you leave, even if you are leaving it for 2-3 hours.

I recently moved with my two dogs and they were fine being home alone in the old place 4-5 hours, but it has taken me months to work up to them being on their own in the new place for more than an hour or so. It's like they have completely reset to how it was when they were puppies.

Please ignore the hysterical dog people on here. Nobody would buy a dog if they would meet their standards of never leaving them home for more than 4 hours or whatever arbitrary figure they have come up with. You'd barely make it out for a nice dinner.
As you are even worried, you get a tick on my list.
I would seriously look at getting 2. I mean once you've got one , you've still got to worry about kennels for any holidays etc . They keep each other company and and are happy together generally.
Don't buy 2 from the same litter though!!
As I already said I think a lovely lazy lab and and maybe a smaller dog for company are perfect for your family.
The people that haven't read your update - not that it was really necessary - are crazy if they think everybody that buys a a dog never leaves it alone for more than 12 hours a week.
Fostering from a rescue is also an option .
There are a lot of foster "fails" - i.e. they keep they dog after falling in love.
Still in favour of a cav or a lab in your situation. preferably one of each. Best wishes.

For a dog without separation anxiety, this will be fine.