A few years ago, I called my older sister (by 8 years) out on her then husband’s sexual harassment of me as a young teen - 12-13 years old. He would have been around 13 years old than me.
He was a disgusting letch who would put his hand out on for e.g a car seat or the sofa so he could grab my bum as I sat down, constantly making sexual references (asking I was wet down there) and even said he would like to pop my cherry in a conversation with my stepfather which my stepfather laughed at. I had no idea what that meant at that time but I clearly remember it due to the reference to cherry and popping it as it confused me as to how they can pop. BIL would often insist on giving me lifts and often would be at our house. My parents witnessed this behaviour. Nothing was ever said. BIL came from a very wealthy family, drove a massive posh car and my family were pretty overawed by him and his family,
Sister’s reaction at the time was to say for goods sake leave her alone and get annoyed with him. I don’t remember her ever saying anything to me about it. He later cheated on her and they’ve been divorced for years.
Anyway, I had a very abusive childhood, physical and horrendous psychological abuse mainly perpetrated by my mother, and about 10 years ago I confronted her about it, she admitted it but said I deserved it, refused to speak to me ever again and cut me, DH and my DC off as did siblings. At that time, one of things I brought up was my ex BILs behaviour and why nothing was done about it, having a teenage DD myself at that time it disgusted me. My mother described as harmless banter.
Sister had messaged me a few years ago saying she’ll try to forgive and forget for me upsetting our mother for bringing up the past and what I’d said about her ex. I said to the effect of you’re fucking joking, what do you need to forgive me for, I’m the one that needs to forgive you for letting your husband do what he did to me! She then blocked me.
Adult DD had recently tried to get in contact with her adult cousins, sister’s daughters, who have ignored her so she directly contacted my sister, her aunt, mostly because she was upset at not being invited to cousin’s wedding who she grew up with. Sister, DD’s aunt, ignored then blocked her.
AIBU to think sister is totally wrong to be angry at me, and by extension DD, for bringing up this behaviour which was allowed to go unchecked and my family of origin is completely fucked up?
Title edited by MNHQ to add a content warning