To ask what you think a reasonable lifestyle is for this income?

[Momeymoney]

They have a DS (11) and a DD (8). Mum and Dad both work full time and when combined their income is £155,000 before taxes. What is a reasonable lifestyle for them to live? How much can they afford to spend on cars, can they afford private school, holidays, etc?

It depends so much on their particular circumstances.

They certainly should be comfortable, but it probably doesn't go as far as a lot of people might think. That's not a "poor them" comment, it's a "the COL has really got away from reality" comment.

I’d think no private school (unless decided to prioritise this and be rather frugal elsewhere in most areas of life), but nice house, car, holidays and generally a nice but not super flashy lifestyle.

I'll bite:

If you've never had children it's not easy to work out how much it will cost to live with them.

I'm expecting my first. We'll probably move out of London and need to get a car. Eventually we'll have to start holidaying in school holidays.

Genuinely no idea what our budget will look like. Yes I can sit and work out the knowns and the unknowns but the point of a forum like this is the opinions of people who are already there.

I know someone on 140k ish with 2 in private school. But they got helped onto the ladder 15 yrs ago in their 20s so have the million pound house with tiny mortgage. Their parents normally gift them their new old car & they have use of family holiday homes so overall outgoings are pretty low. Plus they earn fairly equal amounts so less tax.
Whereas my cousin & his gf earn similar but he earns the bulk, they are renting & paying more than my mortgage & trying to save for a home/pay off student debt. They are also saving/paying into pensions as no future inheritance.

We’ll still have the same cars and fuel bills, same mortgage and an increase in groceries/clothes along with childcare etc covered by our surplus monthly income. We’ve done our costing thoroughly and we’ll still be perfectly comfortable with up to 3 kids.

Of course our holidays will be different as we won’t be going on safari/exploring Asia but from our sums a couple of resort holidays will be similar if not slightly cheaper.

@geip 🙄

I think it's possible to have at least one or two holidays a year, run one or two cars, have takeaway regularly, eat out when you want to, not worry about Christmas spending or bills and have a lot of discretionary spending generally. Being able to afford organic, fresh food and so on. A generally nice lifestyle.

As for private schools - maybe for one, yes, for two it might mean cutting back in other areas.

But it does all massively spend on mortgage, debt, then things like hobbies. If you have horses or a boat maybe forget private school!

Ours is about £130k before tax - private school would be a big ask. Possible for one but would mean cutting back a lot and tight budgeting.

Probably top 5% or less.

Median household income is about £35000.

Op seems to have an 11 year old and an 8 year old. She's not new to this??

There is a quiz here:

https://ifs.org.uk/tools_and_resources/where_do_you_fit_in

So you're netting say £6.5k/month and your mortgage costs are say £2k/month assuming you're not on a historic interest rate and had c10% deposit?

Where's the extra £4k going that you consider yourself so squeezed?!

Depends.

London and south east, big mortgage, like to have savings? It won't go far. My friend has a similar income and has less spare than you'd imagine. It also depends how its split as to how much tax is being paid etc.

Definitely not private or luxury holidays. Where i live (home counties), that'd be a detached 4 bed house but the 80s estate kind, 160 sqm and not a huge garden. one non premium car on finance, state education, a big mortgage, some part time childcare, kids hobbies and a holiday somewhere in europe in summer.

Sorry, £4.5k!

If you consider that the average wage is 30k ish then that is a lot of money. When you say ‘lifestyle’ it really comes down to what their priorities are. Is the priority the kids schooling, (it’s possible to have a great experience and end up At Oxbridge going to a state school but obviously depends where you live) is the priority family holidays and experiences, is it financial stability in retirement. What lifestyle are they looking at? You have to remember these days that the lifestyle influencers have is very set up and they also get a lot of freebies. If going by real life friends socials again you don’t see the day to day things they might sacrifice for ‘the perfect holiday shot’ and many people are living through debt and on finance to afford their lifestyle which won’t last in the long term. You are only ever one job loss away from the breadline.

I'd think the mortgage is more than that - minimum payment is about £1,100 on a mortgage of just over £100,000.

Just make sure you don't ever earn more than 125k each...the tax penalty of having the sole income is amazing compared to two earners earning less.

Mortgage is £1020 for now, due to rise to £1500 next year. We had a big deposit as we stayed with family for 3 years in our 20s. We overpay another £1200 per month. We spend £6000 per year on holidays so that £500 on a monthly basis. Its actually £6700 cos I don't have student loan (parents paid for uni). DH's student loan to be paid off within next two years. DH also invests £500 per month in shares.

No car, just use public transport.

I think we are the squeezed middle cos we don't have so much money that we can invest our money to build wealth nor do we have so little that we would get help from the government (don't even qualify for child benefit). if we did have a child, would spend £2k on childcare fees which we can afford but just about.

I think it would be the case even if we had combined household income of anything below £250k. You are basically middling on a household income from £75k to £249k. Depending on area you might live in a slightly nicer house or stay at nicer hotels on your holidays or get deliveroo more often and you may even save a nice chunk per month but you are essentially just getting by.

Are you writing a novel OP and trying to judge what lifestyle your characters will have.
If so, we need more backstory 😂
Where do they live?
When did they buy their property/ how much is their mortgage?
Do they have family money?
Will they inherit?
Any debts or expensive hobbies?
Is one of the a secret gambler or about to blow the family money on crypto?

If they have a £500k detached house in Derbyshire they bought 12 years ago and a reasonably priced private school nearby then private school and lovely holidays should be doable.

If on the other hand they have just shelled out £800k for a London flat, have an elderly parent in a care home and the nearest private school costs over £20k a year then their choices will be different.

That's similar to our household income. We have what I think is a comfortable life - mortgage on a three bed house, two cars, a main holiday plus a couple of weekends away each year, enough in savings that I don't panic if the dog gets sick or the car breaks down. The kids can do what extracurriculars they want within reason.

We wouldn't stretch to private school or a luxurious house, and we both need to work to maintain our lifestyle.

Well that's exactly our income. With two kids 8 and 4. We have a large mortgage (SE) one car, one ten day holiday per year. We do eat quite expensively at home, we rarely go out for dinner or lunch. The mortgage, bills and car payment take about two thirds of our income and we save about £500 a month each plus pensions now we don't have over £1000 a month in nursery fees.

You invest £25K a year in your property, increasing your wealth.

A household earning £249K puts it in the top 2% of UK households, so however squeezed it may subjectively feel, it is definitely nowhere near the middle.

Pretty much described us there 😂

Yes, it must be fucking hellish if there are two of you earning £125k each.

Weird question but this is about what DH and I earn with DCs 6 and 9. We have a reasonable sized mortgage (about to be £1,400), live in a modern 4 bed house in a decent suburb, drive one electric car and both kids in state school. But likely to send both to private for secondary. We go abroad once a year, maybe twice on not-flashy holidays to Europe. We put loads into our pensions at the moment but if school fees enter the equation that may need to change.

Your husband is investing £500 a month, so that’s a bit disingenuous to say that you can’t invest anything.

And no way is a family on 250,000 just getting by!

I don’t feel like the squeezed middle as a dual income family with no kids and the same yearly income as you plus double the mortgage cost. I feel incredibly lucky.