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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have told DD(7) that the Easter Bunny isn't real?

100 replies

VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 08:08

Talking about Easter this morning to DP explaining that DD is only off for Good Friday and Easter Monday then half term is the week after so DD says to DS(3) "I won't be home when you get to eat chocolate eggs".

I tell DD, yes she will, but it's not half term and anyway doesn't she know what Easter is about, cue the Jesus talk.

"But what about the Easter Bunny? They'll bring us eggs won't they?"
So I tell her no, EB isn't real, it was made up by peopel who want to make money out of us by selling Easter Eggs, it's not like Jesus was eating maltesers on the cross and that she can have one fairtrade Easter Egg (lets hope I can find one!) from us because we love her.

Didn't think much of telling her the truth til I saw DP's 'look' though that might have been the fact that I was giving the poor girla 'talk' on Fairtrade at 7:30am

OP posts:
pooka · 03/03/2008 08:16

Well personally I would have emphasised that she will actually be home for consumption of eggs since she will be at home for Easter Sunday.

If you were really into debunking myths, then perhaps would have mentioned pagan goddess Oestre who turned a wounded bird into a rabbit. Because it had been a bird, it could still lay eggs and is thought to have been behind the origins of the easter bunny, long before the christian adoption of the easter festival. But hey, that's just me
(got that from Wikipedia though).

BreeVanDerCampLGJ · 03/03/2008 08:18

YABU

They grow up so quickly, IMO they don't need any help.

TrinityRhino · 03/03/2008 08:20

tell her jesus is just a fairytale too
come on be fair

Jackstini · 03/03/2008 08:21

Bit mean IMO - it wouldn't have killed you to let her believe for another year. You could still have talked about the true Easter story without saying that. Incidentally I was taught the eggs were a representation of the stone that was rolled away from Jesus' tomb so it would have been an easy transition.
Does she know about Santa yet?

JingleyJen · 03/03/2008 08:23

I personally wouldn't have told her that it wasn't true.. I agree with LGJ.. without extravagant lies I would have held off the reality of the situation.

Original poster
VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 08:28

Santa is different, she knows Santa comes from Saint Nicholas and has never asked anymore about it.

The Easter Bunny though? It's tosh.

OP posts:
Jackstini · 03/03/2008 08:34

Might be tosh to you - might have spoilt a little bit of 'daft, no harm done' childhood fantasy for her...
Depends how she took it - was she fine or upset?

Original poster
VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 08:36

She was fine, she said it did seem a bit silly a rabbit bringing eggs and was more worried about people growing chocolate being treated fairly.
I have just read up on Eastre and the pagan symbolims behind the bunny which I'll explain to her later but I'm not going out buying tons of crappy chocolate eggs to keep up with her friends who got X amount of eggs from the Easter Bunny.

OP posts:
EzrasMummy · 03/03/2008 08:38

I told my 5 yr old ds that father christmas doesnt exist. I am a Christian and the whole materialism thing drives me nuts. he wasnt bothered at all. Each to their own tho.

Jackstini · 03/03/2008 08:39

Fair enough.
FWIW I would never buy tons of eggs for anyone either! 1 is plenty. Will she get some from any relatives etc?
When I was young we had choc eggs from Aunties and Mum got us something non choc instead.

themildmanneredjanitor · 03/03/2008 08:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 08:47

She probably will yes, which will really piss me off.
She will be going to her fathers family on the sunday as it's her cousins birthday and I knwo she'll come home with about 20 eggs.
Probably all Nestle too.
I don't think I would've told her if we hadn't discussed the whole Valentines day/mothers day crapola that goes on in shops but I didn't see how I could explain how the shops are making money out of it all and then not tell her about the Easter Bunny too.

OP posts:
EzrasMummy · 03/03/2008 08:48

I agree about the easter eggs. I just buy one too. If we have more from people, i share them out with DSs cousins and if theres still some left, it takes a few months to get through them.

(or it could be jealousy as i am unable to eat chocolate!)

Original poster
VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 08:49

Actually mmj it is, doesn't mean we have to pretend bunnys bring Easter Eggs or keep quiet about things going on in the wider world.
She is aware of things, she knows that it's unfair, and that she can't do an awful lot to change any of it, but small things like fairtrade etc make a difference.

OP posts:
FrannyandZooey · 03/03/2008 08:51

montezuma or divine have fair trade one

tell your children exactly what you like about beliefs such as this - it is not anyone else's business!

tbh I didn't think anyone's child actually BELIEVED in the Easter bunny - it's just a bit of a laugh - all these mythical deities that children have to believe in now or supposedly 'miss out on the magic of childhood' are getting ruddy silly IMO

FrannyandZooey · 03/03/2008 08:52

ps ds knows about fair trade too and is really enthusiastic about it
no harm in that at all, we all teach our children our own moral systems and there's no reason for anyone to call you po-faced or miserable because of it

teaching your child your values is a good and responsible thing to do

tortoiseSHELL · 03/03/2008 08:56

VS, I think you were exactly right! And well done for the fairtrade talk as well! My 4 year old is a passionate campaigner against tesco, who she says treat the farmers badly!!! No idea where she picked that up from, but didn't disagree with her. I will be getting them fairtrade eggs too, and explaining why fairtrade is important.

We've never done the Easter bunny, or Santa, or the tooth fairy tbh. They haven't lost a SCRAP of enjoyment - lots of people think we're miserable for 'denying them the magic' but they make their own magic. For example, ds1 IS Santa, dresses up, brings presents in, and to the kids that is real as believing in a strange man who comes down the chimney...

IdrisTheDragon · 03/03/2008 08:58

Do people really "do" the Easter Bunny?

Original poster
VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 09:01

Apparently.
We've never 'done' it, I'd just never told her that it wasn't real, but she was telling me how her friends get up in the morning and the bunny has been
Oh FWIW, I told her not to mention it to her friends because their parents obviously weren't ready to tell them yet and it wasn't fair for her to do it as it's none of our business.

OP posts:
tortoiseSHELL · 03/03/2008 09:05

VS - we did that with our kids about FC - told them not to talk about it - but actually when they do, because ds1 dresses up as him, they say 'FC came to our house' and don't actually mention that it was ds1...

pooka · 03/03/2008 10:35

I don't think dd believes that there is a 5 foot high rabbit bringing chocolate. She knows that we buy her one egg and that sometimes dgm buys her a chocolate rabbit or something.
We do always do an easter egg hunt (with the tiny eggs) in my mother's garden because it's fun and I remember doing it in my granny's garden.
We say that the easter rabbit has been (don't like the word bunny for some reason) and might have hidden some eggs. But a total of 5 or 6 tiny mini eggs doesn't seem like a crime to me.
dd is nearly 5 though. ds is 2.5. While I'm not a pagan I do tend to emphasise the ancient origins of festivals rather than the christian side. So easter to us is all about the end of winter and the coming of spring rather than about christ.

SoupDragon · 03/03/2008 10:38

I tell DSs that the Easter Bunny watches them like Father Christmas and if they don't behave they won't get eggs.

Original poster
VictorianSqualor · 03/03/2008 10:46

How old are they soupy?
Do you think they really believe?

OP posts:
seeker · 03/03/2008 10:53

Don't understand why the Easter Bunny can't bring Fair Trade chocolate - he does round here!

TinkerbellesMum · 03/03/2008 10:54

We were never told about the Easter Bunny, I mean we had heard of it, but it was more of a joke and it was on Easter cards but it wasn't told to us in the same way as Father Christmas.

I think that having been introduced to the idea it may have been better to wait for her to be a bit older before she was told different. How many eggs you give her is up to you, there are Fair Trade eggs around if you want to make it one. I wouldn't stop everyone from buying eggs because you have told her that you are buying one because you love her, that makes it look (IMHO) that others don't love her. You can still bring eggs into the Easter story, making them part of new life.

I personally have asked a few people to not buy Tink an egg because last year she had loads and they lasted for ages. Mum is buying her something useful instead.

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