Bring your whole self to work and other bollocks

[Waitingforthetrain]

Hi

Name changed for this.
Is anyone else sick of all this nonsense.
Now I understand it’s all the rage to encourage diversity and inclusivity, yes all good.
However, I go to work as a means to a end. Until I can find some other way of paying my bills it’s a necessity.
Recently we were asked to complete an anonymous survey. Apparently most people could not be arsed. Those who did told it like it is. Exactly that work is work and that’s all. The manager is flawed, the environment is flawed and if they won the lottery tomorrow then staff would piss off and leave.
Apparently the manager is upset by this. There boss is not happy. Blah blah blah.
We now have to think of team building exercises. Nobody cares.
Management do not listen. Staff leave. Management ask how things can improve then do nothing to change.
I don’t want anyone telling me to leave as the role I have suits my purpose.
I go to work. I like most of the staff. I don’t trust the boss.
I do not want to divulge personal info to management as in the past this has been used as a stick to beat me with. The boss is an expert at slipping in criticism based on what you have divulged previously. For example you say your dad has dementia then the reason you are not smiling inanely at customers us because of your dad. You say you are tired because your toddler kept you up all night and the reason you have performed your task but no more us because if your naughty toddler.
None of the staff want team building exercises as the management stay the same, they never take on staff suggestions such as more flexibility, working from home, staff allowed time off at Easter etc.
Even the first suggestion of where to go for the team building was shot down by one of the managers as they do not want to do that activity.
Just having a rant.
Well done if you’ve got to the end.

Well you can hardly bring half or quarter of self to work can you? I mean what part would you leave behind although sometimes I think my brain has left it's building. But urgh I'm with you op, I hate these stupid phrases and I absolutely loath the whole 'team building' shite. In much the same way I think interview questions are a load of tosh, 'why do you want the job?' Real answer 'because I need the money, you twit' acceptable answer 'I know with my skills I can be a real asset to the company....followed by more self bigging up and even more bollocks'.

Yes! I hate this (and I'm wondering whether this is endemic, or whether we do actually work for the same company, op!).

We recently were sent a survey to complete and most of us answered honestly. Manager was visibly devasted by the responses and set up a working group, a biweekly forum to discuss issues, a social committee and various other 'fun' initiatives, however, has completely failed to address the very real problems (pay, workload, training) that were raised. We all wish we'd kept our big mouths shut now!

My issue with this is that it's all so superficial and never addresses anything that people really care about at work. One of the newly appointed (brown-nosing) social champions recently suggested that we mandated team nights out because not enough people were interested in attending! How about making sure people are paid well and actually have the resources to do the fucking job.

Pahahaha what is it with companies not understand we work to live not live to work.

My whole self to work. If my “boss” was anyone other than who they are my ranting correspondents would certainly have me fired and hood up in a padded room.

Like they want the truth. It’s fuck this fuck that it’s fucking bullshit and it can fuck off. Sort your shit out how fucking hard is placing a fucking order. Great you’ve fucked it again fucking useless. To a lot of my contracts 😅

Funny, I was just thinking 'this sounds very much what I walked away from two years ago.'

OP, see my old thread about my manager to tried to force us to keep a gratitude journal. It’s all so hideous.

My company spouts so much nauseating BS.

Bring your authentic self to work

Our workplace is a safe space where you can “speak your truth” or worse “speak truth to power” <vomit>

The company wants to “shine a light” on diverse voices. (The D&I initiatives are so cringeworthy and outrageous I can’t even list them as it would genuinely be quite outing).

Thank god for WFH.

We have endless gratitude moments in our meetings, and good news stories. Drives me insane. I'm told it's because young people in the workplace appreciate a lot of verbal praise and positive reinforcement. Ugh.

There's always a minority of people who join in with this sort of thing with enthusiasm (you know the sort), it makes the rest of us look curmudgeonly, or not team players might be the term they use.

They really wouldn't want my whole self at work. They couldn't handle the whole me!

i can only imagine if I brought 61 years of my baggage and three ex husbands to work with me. Nobody wants to know that stuff.

I prefer to bring my professional self to work and wait until my time off before enjoying the rest of my self. I wish everyone else would do the same. I don't care who anyone else wants to sleep with or what they do in their time off. When I'm at work, I care whether they do their job.

'They don’t mean bring your whole self ( eh? ) they mean bring the positive, happy, can do attitude part of your self and make it the whole part of you during work time.'

Exactly. They're not interested in your gender critical beliefs, or how much you enjoy swearing, or whether you're struggling to survive on your salary

We used to have a young trendy (and very sweet) member of staff who started adding 'glitter moments' at the end of meeting agendas. This is where every member of the team had the 'opportunity' to thank someone or say something they were proud of. I mean, for fuck sake. We are not nursery children. If I want to thank someone, and I often do, I have no difficulty saying that to their face, or sending them an email. Pleased to report that this nonsense got quietly dropped when young trendy person left the team

I don’t like this sort of this at all. I like my colleagues but don’t socialise with them. I’m busy and tired and I just want to do my job and go home.

However I actually like the idea of gratitude and good news stories (sorry). So many people feel unappreciated so I don’t think making an effort to thank them for their hard work is a bad thing. Unless the gratitude is more of the ‘I’m thankful for the sky’ type.

Ever so thankful for my 20p per hour raise mwah haha it’s just arse kissing.

Thank Bob at the time he helped you rather than waiting to make some show of it in the weekly meeting 🤷🏻‍♀️ that’s to show how good you are thanking people like how great am I noticing that someone’s nice.

Thanks for all your replies.
I was starting to think that maybe it was me, maybe I’m the problem but no, you wise lot have confirmed what I suspected all along.
I don’t give a damn about any team building exercise I really, really don’t.
You want to improve morale? Then give me the afternoon off. Or let Mike, Laura, Jeff and Miranda all have a week off at Easter.
Or give us a pay rise.
Or don’t get arsey when I say no, I’m not going to spend my own time after work with you, no matter what you say. I’m polite, pleasant and do my job always but once my 40 hours are done, no you are not having any further part of me.
I do spend time out side of work with certain colleagues but that is it.
Also agree about endless, pointless meetings to discuss ‘how to improve
morale.’ Seriously what is the point?

"Bring your whole self to work is how we have got to the point of AGP men swearing their fetish clothing coming into their places of work and claiming to be lay-dees who have to use the ladies toilets.

No one needs staff to rock up farting, burping, swearing, wearing unsuitable clothing, refusing to wear PPE, drinking on the job etc because that's their "whole self".

Work is work. If you make friends, that's nice, but it's not compulsory.

YA SO NBU @Waitingforthetrain

Just leave me alone to get my work done. If you want me to do more, give me more. I'm not going to search it out on the off chance you might award me for it at the end of the year. I don't care enough to go 'above and beyond' and I don't want you to know much about me - this is WORK. I work to live and not live to work. I didn't get married and have children in order to give my whole self to a fucking institution that doesn't actually give a shit about me!

Incidentally, this article Brits most likely to say 'we don't live to work' was published today which you might find interesting!

I like having a professional persona I find it helps me deal with arseholes who've been problem before rather than getting angry and very upset like DH often seems to - keeps that emotional distance.

I had a team leader who used to say "we are a family". No, I'm an employee. However well we all get along (or in the rare case, don't), we're here because we're paid. You've bought my time, not my soul.

Also had a colleague who berated me for not going to an out-of-hours Christmas do. I simply responded with a polite "shall not be attending" to the organiser. Due to general lack of interest the organiser subsequently called the event off. This, apparently, was my fault. Most of them hadn't even replied at all, including guess who...

💯 OP.

It’s unbearable. Many working places seem to have adopt this almost American culture of work culture BS. I cannot stand this sort of toxic positivity.

Most come to work to pay mortgage and pay for holidays, day ti day life etc. Most would not choose to work in these environments if they did not have to. I too find it so bizarre when the ‘leadership’ ask for surveys and then get ‘sad’ when we say it’s all awful but is what it is etc.

thanks for your post OP 😆

That is EXACTLY what my response to that nonsense would be too. 😂

@ChiefWiggumsBoy I’ve also seen this article today and came here to post to it. It’s very interesting that the UK is at the bottom.

I wonder if it’s mainly driven by our dissatisfaction with pay, I imagine the same would be the case in other countries if it was only related to pay?

How about making sure people are paid well and actually have the resources to do the fucking job.

Absolutely.
I had to do some 'culture improving' work and I was met with blank stares when one (shocking) suggested improvement was adequate staffing so the whole branch didn't collapse if one person was off sick.
The comeback was 'we can't fill vacancies' yea, because the pay is shite & you get more at neighbouring businesses in a more modern and better staffed environment!

Instead they had already formulated a 'solution' involving giving the colleagues another notice board & some poor sap was made a 'champion' for zero extra pay, removing them from the shop floor to fanny with said noticeboard & attend meetings where the power balance was not in their favour.

I also said it should be a top down exercise and we should have a really good look at director level to see how they could improve things & lead on the message that a positive culture is important.

Dear reader, I no longer work there.

It's all shite and everyone knows it.
Work is work. Were there selling our time to a business which is there to deliver a service, or make money for shareholders/directors. End.

Sorry for massive, but cathartic, post.

I would take my whole self into work if I could also go in out in out and shake it all about.

Fortunately we don't really have this nonsense and I'm glad because I wouldn't cope. I did hear manager say "going forward" and just burst out laughing when he asked why I just said "what's wrong with saying from now on."
I have just filled in this year's survey, now called "wellbeing", so it's obviously started. The questions were all geared to make them look good, tbf it is a good company to work for and the main issue I have is increased workload and a reduction in the hours available plus they are so good at wasting money they could run the country. So I filled the 500word comment section with that information. It is supposed to be anonymous but they need your employee number so they know how many people have filled it in. Yeh right.
I would happily put my name to it and also tell the head honchos if they asked me.