Kids at the park

[Imissthe00s]

This is somewhat lighthearted but at the same time argh!😂

Ive had 3 hours sleep. Brought 2 kids the park (I’m a nanny), small park with lots of play equipment. I filled water bottles, brought snacks.

All I asked is that they go play and just give me some time to chill as no actual break so have to fit in time to breath and eat when I can (very small enclosed park, I can see them wherever they are). They are over every 2 minutes. Constant shouting to get them up on the see saw that’s over a metre off the ground. No, there are about 7 other things they can manage on their own. Ask if they want to leave then. No, they want to stay. I send them over to the hill to roll down. They go over and just stare. It’s like they have no bloody concept of independent play and using their imagination.

The days out they have with their parents are paid activity places (soft play, theme parks, constant buying the tat around attractions) but my approach is letting kids use their imaginations outdoors.

Of course I play with them and have done since 8am this morning but AIBU to wonder what happened to kids being able to have fun just running around the park?! Argh I just want 20 minutes peace! Can anyone relate? 😂

You’d call in sick for being tired?!

Not what you want in any job is it? But what are people supposed to do? You'd also be unhappy if a childcare setting shut because someone only got three hours sleep, or you didn't get your next day delivery because the Amazon driver was tired, or your GP appointment was cancelled because the GP's kids kept them up all night etc.

I agree with you about it being good to let them play. And if it's your approach for an hour or two of the day today then sure. Not all day though. Which I doubt you'll do. I'm sure you'll be more than earning your pay the rest of the day.

I wonder if the responses would have been different if you said you were a SAHM and wanted a break during the day. Sounds like you've done a lot of adult led activities and it's a good thing to let kids get bored and entertain themselves sometimes.
Tricky if you have a WFH parent who doesn't help in the sense of giving you a break but who gets involved when you don't necessarily need/want it!

I'd raise it and ask if they can facilitate a 20 minute break around lunchtime where they take responsibility for the kids and you go for a walk. Obviously only if they are at home and if they can fit around their schedule but the majority of wfh jobs would accommodate that. I know I'd like the opportunity to have lunch with my kids when working from home as I miss them!

YANBU. Children being able to entertain themselves is a bit of a learned skill I think. Can you get them started on some kind of imaginary game, give them an idea and see if they'll run with it? The grumpy troll lives under the slide and they've got to sneak around the playground collecting eggs (stones) from his magical chickens without waking him or he'll come out and demand they make him an omlette (I'm never sure how to spell that). Any random story to get them thinking and see if they can build on it themselves. It might not get you much time right now, but they'll get better at it with practice.

Imissthe00s
I think the reason you may not be getting an easy time (and I am sorry), is that some jobs, rightly or wrongly, you don’t expect people to moan about. Yes everyone has bad days, but you kind of hope with certain vocations they won’t ever say they just want a break! Eg a cleaner came on here once going mad that the people she was cleaning for had left the place in such a state beforehand and said how disgusting they were and I thought ‘no!’ Same as that a friend of mine heard a beautician say how hairy the person was that they’d had and she walked out. I know it’s not the same but it’s tough to hear and think that someone thinks like that!

I don’t think nannies are obliged to constantly play with their charges.

Yes, some play is good but the rest of the time keeping them fed, watered and out of danger should be enough.

Wtf? You think nannies, cleaners and beauticians aren’t allowed to moan?

Of course you shouldn’t leave a disgusting mess for the cleaner, they are there to clean not deep clean, that is a different and more costly job.

I can’t believe you need to be told this.

What job do you do? Office based I bet.

If you can’t be bothered to play with them maybe you’re not really cut out to work in childcare. It’s not their fault you’ve not had enough sleep.

If you can’t be bothered to play with them maybe you’re not really cut out to work in childcare. It’s not their fault you’ve not had enough sleep.

What? Sometimes, when I've had 3hrs sleep, I can't be bothered to play with my own kids for 20 minutes. Does that mean I'm 'not really cut out' to be a mother? Do you have children?!

Do you play with your children 24/7? No, you don’t. You’re probably MNing most of the time.

So YABU to expect lots of play from a nanny. Ridiculous.

Don't be so obtuse.

I have friends who have children like this. It got to the point where it just wasn't fun going anywhere with them because we had to spend the whole time watching their children do pretty unimpressive things like go down a slide. Not even toddlers, older kids who are used to being micromanaged. And the parents cause it themselves. Constantly complaining they don't get a break then the second the kids look like they might do something independently, they're over there interfering.

And I do feel for you. Even though as others had said it's your job, there aren't many jobs out there where you're just officially not allowed a break like it is with being a nanny.

Wtf? You think nannies, cleaners and beauticians aren’t allowed to moan?

Of course you shouldn’t leave a disgusting mess for the cleaner, they are there to clean not deep clean, that is a different and more costly job.

I can’t believe you need to be told this.

What job do you do? Office based I bet.

I work in a shop. My take would be if someone is getting a cleaner it’s as likely to be because they can’t handle/ cope and I’d hate for someone to be saying eg my mother must be disgusting behind her back.

Imissthe00s · Yesterday 10:43

I didn’t choose to have 3 hours sleep Jesus Christ haha!

also without specifying one of their parents works in a role that puts them in the surgeries of children with heart conditions. So funnily enough, I persevere through tiredness so that paren doesn’t have to call out of work and delay a child’s bloody heart surgery”

That makes all the difference. I had imagined you’d just been out late. My apologies.

ShirleyPhallus · Yesterday 11:06

MrsSkylerWhite · Yesterday 09:30

Maybe don’t go to work on 3 hours’ sleep?

You’d call in sick for being tired?!”

In some jobs, yes.

YANBU. I hope the people on this thread criticising you never moan about your jobs ever.

I'm sure OP loves her job, but you don't have to enjoy every minute of it of every day. It's fine to want a couple of minutes peace. I work in customer service, I enjoy it for the most part but when someone has been shouting at you for an hour on the phone I take a few minutes to go and make a cuppa and unwind because it gets stressful. Looking after kids is the same!

I think you're being precious. People are allowed to complain about their jobs, and complaining anonymously on Mumsnet is absolutely fine.

You sound very controlling and paranoid.

Why did you turn up for work, in a job looking after young children, when you've only had 3 hours of sleep?

The kids will be back to school tomorrow, won't they?

And you’d be fine with your nanny calling in sick to work because she’s tired?

Everyone has to turn up for work even if they're tired, don't they?
Can you imagine the uproar if teachers, childminders and nannies regularly called in tired
Would your boss really be cool with you not going in if you hadn't slept well? Presumably that means 90% of new mums shouldn't be going to work at all...

I'm surprised to see so many people thinking people should take days off after a bad night sleep. It's so different to what I've seen on many other threads where people mention being too tired to do certain things safely, they get told to suck it up and that a bad night sleep isn't an illness and not a valid reason to let others down.

How many of the people giving op a hard time for going to work have chosen to drive the day after a bad night sleep themselves? A recent thread the majority of people told an op it's ridiculous to suggest people shouldn't drive if they've not slept well as it would be practically every day they couldn't get to work, their kids would miss school and have low attendance or they'd miss medical appointments because for many people with young children or older ones with health issues that affect sleep, a bad night sleep is the norm.

I worked in daycare and it's very common for staff to have cane to work when tired, we would be deemed unreliable and fired if we didn't work after a bad nights sleep, especially when a lot of the parents using my nursery would be heading to their own jobs as nurses, teachers, care workers etc after a bad night sleep themselves, they're hardly going to be tolerant of the nursery closing with no noticed because ratios can't be met due because staff didn't sleep well for whatever reason.

If it was standard for everyone who works in these types of jobs to not go to work because they are didn't sleep well then things would be a bigger shit show than they are now in education and healthcare and other industries. We, as a society are very long way off a bad nights sleep being a valid reason for not working.

I think you're being precious. People are allowed to complain about their jobs, and complaining anonymously on Mumsnet is absolutely fine.

You sound very controlling and paranoid.
Thats a bit extreme isn’t it? If you had someone vulnerable and the person helping them/looking after them/ dealing with them was giving out about them(and I’m not saying about op here), would you not say they’re in the wrong job? My brother with mh issues, my mum who can’t clean for example, or the lady ahead of my friend in the beautician that afterwards the beauticians were saying how disgusting it was how hairy she was. I just think you should keep some things to yourself

I see both sides

I was a nanny for 20yrs

And yes we don't get a break unless they nap /at school and they can be demanding and when it's hot and your feel ahhhhhh

Yes all children should be able to entertain theirselves /with siblings esp when in diff location/at the park with fun stuff for 15/20m

It's what a good nanny teaches their charge - independent play

Equally

It is your job and if you weren't so tired you prob would have more patience

Saying all that - mini blondes can play by herself and I will tell her to go and play with babies /do painting /go outside /read book /watch tv etx

It's good for them to use imagination

OP isn't saying the kids are disgusting though. She was saying she just wanted a quick break. Like everyone does at work.