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Original poster

My Husband said he's using Bumble to find friends....🤔

59 replies

MandyBrand · 03/09/2023 04:05

I recently found out my husband of 3 years has a Bumble profile after seeing a marketing email for the service on our shared computer. He swears up and down that he's using it in the "Friend Finding Mode". I, do not believe him whatsoever and I told him that he has to leave immediately pending divorce. We have a 1 year old daughter together, which is the only reason I could ever consider giving him another chance . Is there any potential credibility to his claims, or is he just cheating? Am I being unreasonable for not believing him???

OP posts:
Pickingmyselfup · 03/09/2023 08:09

I am using it for the very same thing although I told my husband about it because he knew I wanted to find more friends. I'm using another app too although I've given up at the minute, don't have the time to forge a new friendship.

I don't see why a man wouldn't use an app for finding friends too but I would have thought the subject would have come up by now.

The only way to know is to look at his account and it will tell you what mode it is in as well as what his profile says.

EmilyBlp · 03/09/2023 08:14

Maxium · 03/09/2023 04:10

Uhm, you know he's lying. There is no way someone uses Bumble for "Finding Friends". Its for finding something alright...but not that. I've tried the friend mode before and there were literally less than 20 people on it, and I live in the of the most populated cities...They were all other people of the same sex looking for same-sex relationships under the guise of friendship anyways. There is a site somewhere that indexes Bumble profiles I heard of... I don't recall what its named, but they show what mode a person's profile was used in, and they take regular snapshots all around the world.

You mean that Buzzhumble site? It's all over Australia and the UK... thousands of cheaters getting snagged.

Oysterbabe · 03/09/2023 08:14

He would have removed anything incriminating by now. If you didn't immediately demand access to his account you have missed your chance to see the truth.

EmilyBlp · 03/09/2023 08:20

accidental duplicate

BanditsOnTheHorizon · 03/09/2023 08:26

Did he tell you op, or did you find the app and confront him?

Oysterbabe · 03/09/2023 14:44

BanditsOnTheHorizon · 03/09/2023 08:26

Did he tell you op, or did you find the app and confront him?

I recently found out my husband of 3 years has a Bumble profile after seeing a marketing email for the service on our shared computer.

Thepeopleversuswork · 03/09/2023 14:50

I mean in fairness I get marketing emails from bumble and I deleted it four years ago. So that part of it is theoretically possible. If it were just the fact that there was an email I wouldn't have ruled that out of hand.

But he's shot himself in the foot saying he's looking for friends with this. If he's admitted he's using it proactively he's written his own death warrant. No one uses those apps for friends. Certainly no heterosexual men.

Joeylove88 · 03/09/2023 15:17

In my opinion he is lying to you. The first thing I'd be asking him is why didn't he tell you in the first place that he was on there looking for new friends? If he's your H then he should be able to tell you anything. But he doesn't want to because he was clearly going on there to find women 🙄 men are so thick sometimes the excuses they come out with are so terrible they are almost genuisly bad!!!

Kyovashad · 03/09/2023 15:20

Just ask to look and you can see if he's like the people under dating or BFF mode. You switch between to two. So he could be telling the truth. He can't delete likes either, they just show up in grey if the other person hasn't liked back.

lemoncurd1995 · 03/09/2023 15:21

But, there is a friend finding part of it? I know plenty of people who have used it for this reason, even when they weren't single and their partners didn't leave them for this.

You clearly have some other reasons to not believe him. I would suggest you ask him to show you everything on the app to be sure. However genuinely, the friends finder is an actual thing.

Deathbyfluffy · 03/09/2023 15:24

worriedandworries · 03/09/2023 06:40

There's a specific section called bumble BFF, which is where you can find friends.

If it was any other app I'd say he was lying, but I've found friends on this app and my other friends also found friends on this app. However we had the forethought to tell our husbands we were doing so.

There's a highly likely possibility he's telling the truth.

This. Ask to see his phone and the messages, and you’ll soon find out if he’s telling the truth.

maddening · 03/09/2023 15:27

The only way to know is to look at his app I reckon, though he may have changed his profile now but perhaps there is a history - any deletions from that would be a clincher as well imo.

lucya66 · 03/09/2023 15:29

I’ve used bumble friends and met two lovely women. You can set it so you don’t see the opposite sex!

is he meeting men or women there?

NeunundneunzigHorseBallonz · 03/09/2023 15:31

And I’m engaged to Keanu Reeves….

OlympicProcrastinator · 03/09/2023 15:34

Men do not use it to find friends. Absolutely no way. Plus women have to make the first move. But men just do not meet other men ‘for friendships’ because they are a bit lonely. Don’t let him talk you round. If he is already doing this when you have a one year old he will definitely do it again if you let it go this time.

Im sorry OP.

Blackscrackleanddrag · 03/09/2023 15:36

He's lying. It would have come up in conversation if he were using it to make friends.

Sorry, but I have a currently devastated friend who believed her partner's lies when he was outed to her for cheating. Years later several other OW have come out of the woodwork. All those wasted years with a cheating arse. Don't let that be you OP.

Cheeseandlobster · 03/09/2023 15:36

Maxium · 03/09/2023 04:10

Uhm, you know he's lying. There is no way someone uses Bumble for "Finding Friends". Its for finding something alright...but not that. I've tried the friend mode before and there were literally less than 20 people on it, and I live in the of the most populated cities...They were all other people of the same sex looking for same-sex relationships under the guise of friendship anyways. There is a site somewhere that indexes Bumble profiles I heard of... I don't recall what its named, but they show what mode a person's profile was used in, and they take regular snapshots all around the world.

You are completely wrong. Bumble DOES have a friendship app because I have used it in the past

WunWun · 03/09/2023 15:38

If you switch from dating mode to friend mode on the same account your matches on the mode you're leaving get deleted. Or they did a year ago anyway.

turntgelightsdown · 03/09/2023 15:38

If it was all innocent and 'friends only', why did you have to discover it for yourself?!

I'm really sorry you're going through this. It's so massively painful. 😌

TheCatterall · 03/09/2023 15:39

I’ve used it to find friends locally for interests, walking etc and can understand the confusion. I told my partner ul
front about it and they are welcome to check if they need the reassurance. It’s a different type of profile and section for finding friends.

Bored1000 · 03/09/2023 15:41

He looking to cheat and is lying to you.
I would start preparing for the worst as it’s only a matter of time before he does it.

Get your ducks in a row and be prepared to separate when he does, also gather and maintain evidence.

EatYourVegetables · 03/09/2023 15:45

Yeah, and I’m using my vibrator to massage my sore neck.

Crikeyalmighty · 03/09/2023 15:47

@Maxium not true necessarily as I actually did use it exactly for that and net a nice friend about 4 years ago after reading about it on here - I just don't think men look to meet 'friends' that way

Aserena · 03/09/2023 16:23

Why not ask him to open the app and prove to you that’s how it’s been used?

RobertaFirmino · 03/09/2023 16:27

I'd be tempted to create my own profile in the friendfinder mode, just to find out what is really going on...