To think I might be neurodivergent ?

[chatenoire]

I've been thinking about it for some time, and I think I'm definitely somewhere on the spectrum. Coincidentally a GP once told me I had "OCD" traits, but I've also read people who are neurodivergent sometimes get told this.

So I took a test and this is the result!

It doesn't bother me, if anything it's a relief as it explains many things :)

I am glad that there is more awareness of ND these days and hopefully less stigma.

I really suffered at school (I am 52 now) because I was ''different'' which led to bullying, and even assault, and nobody bothered to look into what was happening to me.

I struggled throughout my life with my inability to form relationships, issues with communicating, compulsive/obsessive behaviour, issues at work and with noise/crowds (causing overwhelm and anger). Also not liking touch and physical closeness.

At least now I know there is a very good reason for all the above and that these traits are just common traits when you are ND.

I truly hope no kid has to go through what I went through and that instead they are accessed properly and supported...

Exactly! I also did well at school so I think they just thought my behaviours were part of being "bright".

Another thing is that I never really cared about family relationships (apart from my DM and even then in small doses). Which could also be part of it too.

My uncle was sectioned for periods of his life, so at home there always was this MH stigma.

I never got jokes, nobody ever got mine, it makes sense.

This sounds so similar to me (and I'm a similar age too). There was just nothing to help back when I was young. I was just blamed for being bullied!
I've struggled with a lot of things throughout my life and I've spent a huge amount of time wondering why other people are so horrible and nasty. I guess they probably aren't really and just don't see things the same way I do.
I'm hoping a diagnosis will help me access advice type of support rather than financial support. I don't even know how to ask for understanding from my employer and I'm so used to being brushed off and just left to figure things out when I've never really known how.

Wondering if a huge number of people are neurodiverse, at what point does that become the neurotypical? Is there even a neurotypical?

I've thought about this too and think maybe we'll move to something like the Kinsey scale

What causes neurodivergency?
Is it there from birth or does it come on.

@girlfriend44 Neurodivergent is developed in the womb. Which is why scientists saying vaccines cause autism is a load of rubbish.
However, significant physical and emotional trauma can cause 'rewiring' of the brain in a a way that replicates autism and other neurodivergences but they are not the same thing and it is difficult to unmuddle the web to find out what is the causal issue.

Quick update that I've contacted a local private assessment clinic. They do a pre-assessment and only take you in if they think it's worth it.

Genetics. It might not be noticed till later in life though.

So true! My DS has two best friends, both clearly ND although I’m not sure if both sets of parents are fully aware (one definitely is). They’ve been friends since the start of school so definitely had a radar about them to bring them together!

I’ve said this exact thing to my husband. Reminds me of the film Incredibles, when the evil villain says when everyone is Super, no one will be. I think change is needed in terms of defining, but given the pace of everything (and also priorities of course) it won’t happen for a long time.

Private clinic came back with initial assessment results, and I do warrant a full diagnostic assessment..I really don't have the £2k but it's good evidence to show the GP

So does this mean social norms and practices would change to fit the ND way of doing things if we were the majority? Tell me where to sign up now!

Hope you get your answers OP. I don't have an official diagnosis, but ended up having CBT after a few issues. My therapist said something off hand about my 'ND brain' and it was like switching a lightbulb on! Suddenly my life made much more sense.

I took the test and produced similar spike results and 97% likely.
I have no ND diagnosis.
I think I might have some spectrum features like obsessive interests, avoidant of eye contact and logic over emotion but I don't necessarily think that these things are indicators of ND.
It seems to me that there are an increasing number of people who claim to be neurodiverse who aren't, so personally I wouldn't jump to the label without an official diagnosis.
Also something to bear in mind is that the rise in online comms has also acted to decrease peoples comfort levels with in person comms. Which can be misconstrued as neurodiversity.

I definitely agree with you, but there are things that are definitely unrelated to the dawn of the internet and online interactions. I've dug them in the depths of my mind.

I remember when I was 11/12 I would write down every time any of the songs of my favourite band at the time was on the radio. I would write down the station, the song, the time of the day, and would run daily tallies and look for patterns.

It's also down to the use of a formal diagnosis, what would I use it for? Like I've said, just to know I'm me and that there was never odd about me, it was just how I was born.

If you are neurodivergent you have come to the right place. I am always very surprised at the number of mums on here that have neurodivergent children.

We sound very similar @chatenoire in our childhood behaviours. I have recently had a full, formal diagnosis.

I realise now that I don't need support, having made it to middle age, but I would just like to hang out with other ND people, but there don't seem to be that many forums to do so.

Not unreasonable to think it but I am not sure it means much really, I think that most people have some neuro-divergent traits. I have a diagnosis of ADHD which I am unsure about now. I think it would be more useful to think of it as areas where you have relative strengths and weaknesses and to find ways to maximise your strengths and compensate for your weaknesses.

I listened to a talk by a psychiatrist the other day who said that psychotherapy and coaching for ADHD is proving just as effective for the condition as the medication, if not more so but that it is just too expensive to deliver to most people who need it.

In any case self knowledge is always a useful thing.

@momtoboys Shock and Horror! Parents turn to Parenting forum for advice on parenting!

ND children are more likely to have challenging behaviour or struggles than NT children, why wouldn't parents look on a parenting forum for support, ideas and camararderie?

@LittleRedYarny wouldn’t it be nice! I do think technology is moving in ways to support this, and I can think of lots of workplaces now which are much more ND friendly, especially with options of remote working, things like that. I think workplaces are more ND friendly than schools/general childhood.

Got my referral!

I am diagnosed as autistic - I paid privately in the end because I needed to understand why I was coping with some situations so badly, and the diagnosis just brought into focus so much of my past which I'd just chalked down to being a really shit human being (there were points I thought I was such an awful person I had considered suicide). I went into it though with the knowledge that I was never going to change ME, I just needed to understand what was making ME do things in a me-way a bit better (and let's face it - I'd given "keep calm and mask to try to be like everyone else" a good 40 years as an approach and it wasn't doing the job).

It has been life changing for me to understand how I'm wired - to be able to differentiate from situations where I'm anxious for whatever reason, and situations where the anxiety is coming from sensory overload (one I can control and manage much better than the other). It gave me the chance to request reasonable adjustments at work (nothing major, nothing that would annoy colleagues - although my existence in the job would piss off the knuckle draggers on here - things like noise cancelling headphones to focus in work) and to connect with other ND colleagues as well.

Unfortunately on MN at the moment autism seems to be the wind them up and watch them go troll fodder.

I could have written this :). Same as you I just want to understand myself and why I react one way as opposed to day stress.

I've been thinking about it (quelle surprise !) And I've concluded that at least the GP that saw me needs more training (as much as I'm grateful she referred me). Her face of shock and horror when I explained some of my symptoms wasn't the best of feelings.