Is my vagina being unreasonable?

[PleaseUseTheSanitaryBinsProvided]

Posting here for traffic

I haven’t been able to use tampons for the past 6 months ish. I get them in the right place, but they end up ‘sliding’ down (can’t think of how else to describe) to a place where I can feel them/is uncomfortable/painful. So I have to remove them. It feels like my vagina is expelling tampons. Has anyone ever experienced this?? Found a solution? Has any advice??

For context, I have an 18 month old, born via c section, no birth injuries sustained. I’m 37. I noticed at some point in the last year that I was clenching my pelvic floor muscles almost all of the time. I now make a concerted effort to release the muscles, and I do pelvic floor exercises when I remember.
Have tried to change my position/technique when inserting tampon, situation has improved but it doesn’t last long.
No pain or discomfort during intercourse.

I absolutely hate using only pads/having to witness the carnage and live with that sensation of being wet and the fear I may leak on clothes, seats, etc

Tried cup before and it didn’t suit me so not an option.

help!!

Modibodi are brilliant with a wide range of absorbancies.
They often have discounts and offers.
They also do swimwear and gym bottoms.

Me too.

Especially if you are planning another child at some point.

It's not always an issue of being too loose, it can be that you're too tight in some areas and too loose in others which you need specific exercises for to balance your pelvic floor.

Tampax compact applicator variety are shorter and expand out the way, particularly the ‘pearl’ ones (I don’t like them for this reason but might suit you!).

Tampax normal applicator are longer and thinner, I prefer them.

definitely consider true round-the-corner theory. Mine sort of hit and go sideways. Bizarre. Probably why the shorter wider style don’t suit me.

ive never once managed to get a non-applicator one in to the right place, and I’ve been menstruating for 20 years.

Same! Tampax were the most widely advertised but I found them hopeless even as a teenager (no kids then). Lillets worked so much better!

I thought this was just me! What an eye opener of a thread. Definitely getting myself some non applicator ones to try.

After my first (vaginal) birth I couldn't use tampons. I had birth injuries and just put it down to that but seems it's normal reading these posts.
I've since had a CS birth and haven't tried tampons again. I always used the tampax Pearl or compact anyway so might try again.

Since my second child the bleeding is unreal - it's like someone knocked a bucket over the first few days and it's uncontrollable. I don't think a tampon could take it. I despise using pads and I'm getting more and more fed up of them. This month I was having to change every 15mins.

I use period pants but can't trust them to contain everything so use pads with them for the first few days. I've got Cheeky Wipes pants but find them sweaty and uncomfortable. Sainsburys are so comfortable but couldn't trust the absorbency. Bought a ton of modibody but they're too small 😖.
I've bought a Tampax Cup to try but haven't built up the courage to try it yet.

I only ever use pads as i cant use tampons .

Just to say I had this problem after DS 2 was born. I had a Mirena coil for a while and then tried with tampons again later and the problem was resolved. I think that somewhere down the line the pelvic floor exercises did some good.

Fabulous title OP.
I agree with the ‘round the bend’ comment.
Using the none applicator type you can jiggle the tampon into place rather than depending on the applicator.

Never thought my vag would just start throwing her toys out of the pram!

Thanks again all for your advice - I’ll try to do yoga and kegels more often, look for a physio, buy some non applicator tampons . Will have a think about the coil and might get period pants and try out different cups, depending on how that goes.

glad also the thread resonated with some women who thought their vags were being more unreasonable than others!

Yes I had that too, turns out when i stand up my uterus drops but not enough to show, so I have a prolapse but didn't find that out for some years. i only found out when i had a standing vaginal examination which was as embarrassing as it sounds.

If you have noticed yourself clenching at times, then you might have tight pelvic muslces, so continuing to do kegels will only exacerbate the issue. Id ask to see a womens health physio who can assess for prolapse as well as any tightness.

Best AIBU title in a long while and yes vaginas are always unreasonable ! Find non applicator tampons better for not sliding down ( bigger sizes stay put ) but think mirena coil may be worth a try if you don’t want more children

Menopause made me want to break up with my vag completely - it just got irritated at everything - towels, tampons - nothing made it happy - period pants are amazing - I use M+S, my vag doesn't notice so no tantrums.

Now if I can just stop the stroppy bastard from permanently giving me a feeling of broody cystitis and ring cramp we might become friends again

Mine is VVU- won’t let any tampon close - and it doesn’t even have the excuse of a pregnancy

OP I use Wuka period pants, they have been an absolute game changer for me. I haven't used a tampon or a pad since I got enough pairs to cover me for a whole cycle, I am honestly absolutely evangelical about them.

I have a couple of different styles but the ones I like the most are the seam free heavy flow ones, which are super comfortable:

https://wuka.co.uk/collections/heavy-flow/products/wuka-perform-seamless-midi-brief-heavy-flow

I have crazy periods sometimes (PCOS) but have never had an issue with leaks, including overnights in the heaviest bit of my period. I've also just seen on the website that there is also a 'super heavy' flow category (not seamless though) which might be of interest to you if you're worried about leaks.

If you do order some, let us know how you get on!

My vagina has been a bit unreasonable for years, and I really wish I had heeded the early warning signs and done something about it as the prolapse has got much worse. To everyone on here I recommend more care and attention to your vagina. Kegels aren’t the solution for everyone. There’s also a thing called Hypopressives. To me, they are the best thing since sliced bread.

Mine has been so much better since I've gone back on a pill containing oestrogen.

To those mentioning prolapse - would pain and/or discomfort during intercourse also be a problem?

I really thought this was because of the tight pelvic muscles, what an eye opener!

will definitely look into the pill. Just have a (perhaps irrational) thing against it. Went off it when I was in my early twenties, didn’t have any bad side effects etc whilst on it so don’t even have a personal reason to be against it!

I thought kegels would help with the relaxing muscles part of it - will defo consult a physio

@macaroonsandgin thanks!

Could your vagina be a narcissist? I’m getting a lot of red flags.

Get thee to a women’s physio. Vag pain on insertion or during penetration is often a tight pelvic floor.

If you’re gripping your pelvic floor then potentially you’ve got pregnancy induced laxity elsewhere in your pelvis that needs to be stabilised. Just remembering to relax periodically won’t help solve the problem as your pelvic floor will keep trying to compensate for the laxity.

I had similar issues after child birth. I'd echo the other recommendations to ask for a referral for physio. They can help with your kegels and ensure you're doing them properly. This helped me immensely.

Failing that - I'm also a fan of period pants 😀