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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend said our holidays are boring

361 replies

SusanandMidge · 31/08/2023 14:50

My friend and her husband love travelling and go on about 4 holidays a year. This year they've been to Egypt, India and Japan and are planning a trip to Croatia next month,
We prefer to holiday in the UK. Just throw everything into the car, no airport security, worrying about losing passports, delayed flights etc. We genuinely enjoy driving around places like the Lake District, Devon, Wales etc., stopping off at nice villages, chilling out in the garden of rented cottages with a glass of wine and a book, pottering up to the local pub for dinner and all that.

Last night, after a couple of drinks, my friend asked me why we go on such 'boring' holidays. I just said I wouldn't really enjoy the holidays she goes on but each to their own. She started persisting, saying 'don't you want to see the world' and so on. I pointed out that when we were younger we went to the States, Australia and lots of European countries. Then she said yeah but that was years ago, and we should 'treat ourselves' to a few nice holidays.

We're about to head down to Cornwall for a week, but her comments have kind of ruined it. I really don't want to go on long haul holidays and was content with our UK holidays but now just feel like everyone thinks we're boring and unadventurous. AIBU.

OP posts:
Bumblebee2022 · 31/08/2023 18:45

your friends sound like my parents. They can not understand how anyone could possibly enjoy doing things differently to them. They have no idea why anyone would go on an activity holiday, a long haul holiday or a cruise, why anyone would have their main meal at lunch time, why anyone would be vegan, why anyone would want to live in a city, why anyone would prefer a takeaway over a home cooked roast dinner, there’s a whole list of things they don’t get (these are Real examples from the past couple of weeks).

i am fed up of trying to explain that everyone is different and how that’s ok. It’s like talking to a small child who doesn’t want to listen.

don’t let your ‘friends’ ruin your holiday. You enjoy holidays like the one you are going on and that’s all that matters.

Canisaysomething · 31/08/2023 18:45

Fun positive loving people can holiday anywhere and have a good time. It's only pompous snobs who NEED to go on exotic holidays abroad to have fun. That's because for those people, braging about their holidays is most of the fun.

Dymaxion · 31/08/2023 18:49

It would be very boring ( and busy) if we all wanted to go to the same places. I don't want to share a hotel room or a one bedroomed apartment with my teenage children, on holiday I never want less space than I have at home when it comes to sleeping arrangements. I might consider further afield than the UK and there are places in Europe I would love to see, but it would mean travelling without DH as I think the cost of health insurance might put the kibosh on it.

FullFatPhil · 31/08/2023 18:55

@explainthistomeplease I live on the coast too. In a holiday town. I use the sea and beaches regularly.

Our waters are often shit free but thanks to the water boards and this government, not often enough. The south coast today is appalling and it is intentional discharges of sewage by the water board. So many holidaymakers unaware too. Vile.

Friend said our holidays are boring
Gingerlygreen · 31/08/2023 18:57

You couldn't pay me to go abroad and those who just sit by a pool all day and only move to eat and drink are my idea of boring.
However as others have said it's a good thing we're all different and she was very rude to say that to you, some people make themselves feel better by making others feel bad.

It's rather ott though to say you don't feel the same now about your holiday to Cornwall

ScarlettBeauregarde · 31/08/2023 19:11

CherryMaDeara · 31/08/2023 15:02

Loved my UK holiday.

That looks amazing @CherryMaDeara where did you go? Any hotels you’d recommend?

WedRine · 31/08/2023 19:11

I do find your type of holiday boring. I also find Ed Sheeran's music, all ball sports, rom-coms, and jigsaws boring. I'm just not arrogant enough to think that no one else should find them interesting. Go and enjoy yourself.

Crikeyalmighty · 31/08/2023 19:11

I love all kinds of holidays abroad and UK, but a definite no to camping in UK or cottages/ apartments in uk - far too many overpriced and underwhelming ones.

I prefer to go abroad simply to get a better chance of some consistent weather- but I don't like being organised either- so would hate your friends holidays too -- ignore her, your cash, your choice!!

Crikeyalmighty · 31/08/2023 19:14

@Gingerlygreen that's a bit dramatic to say you couldn't pay me to go abroad- not all hols are fly and flops- any particular reason why you aren't interested in abroad at all- not even city breaks or the Alps or similar - ? Not criticising, I'm more curious.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 31/08/2023 19:16

Everyone should do what they enjoy, not what others expect of them.

I like a mixture of different kinds of holidays personally so would enjoy both your kind and your friend’s. But it’s what you enjoy that mattered!

Riverlee · 31/08/2023 19:16

I wouldn’t like her holidays either. I prefer an amble around a town or place of interest, nice pub lunch etc. we do that in the UK or France or Holland.

Shes missing a lot of lovely places in the UK.

FKATondelayo · 31/08/2023 19:25

Before the summer I met up with a friend and told her about my planned & long-awaited holiday. She just said "oh my god, that sounds awful." I didn't take it personally, I just laughed. We have different tastes that's all. It certainly didn't ruin my (amazing) holiday.

I sometimes go on her type of holiday (5 star AI Caribbean) and sometimes I go camping in Wales. And everything in between.

peachypudding · 31/08/2023 19:27

The good news OP, is that the forecast is for ☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ here in Cornwall this coming week. So you'll have a fab time I'm sure!

billy1966 · 31/08/2023 19:32

Your friend is really rude. Really rude.

Anyone who asks that type of question is usually a narrow minded bore.

She somehow thinks that travelling gives her a badge of superiority and makes her vastly more interesting.🙄

It really is performative travelling🙄.

I write this as someone whom travelled and lived on several continents, really had the bug for years but 20 years ago bought a second home on the beach and loved holidaying at home when the children were all.

We are just back from 3 weeks in Italy in 30 degree heat, not the worst heat and we had a lovely time, but I will NEVER holiday in the southern Mediterranean in July or August again.

The crowds and heat are no longer bearable IMO.

I think your holidays sound so lovely and relaxing.

Each to their own.
Absolutely rude to give an unasked for opinion.

BashfulClam · 31/08/2023 19:40

You do you. We all have different interests. I prefer relaxing holidays, my friend spends her whole holiday drinking and meeting up with new couples who she keeps in touch with, I’d rather gouge my own eyeballs out than make ‘holiday pals’.

ManyATrueWord · 31/08/2023 19:45

Back at you, @suckrifice . People who criticise others don't do so because they are happy on themselves

CalistoNoSolo · 31/08/2023 19:48

LegendsBeyond · 31/08/2023 17:33

Devon is your idea of hell? Interesting.

Show quote history

Yup. I find the whole area massively overrated. It's a pita to get to, it's very expensive, the weather is generally shite and the scenery is pretty mid compared to lots of other uk places. So yes, you couldn't pay me enough to to go back to Devon/dorset/Cornwall.

CalistoNoSolo · 31/08/2023 19:50

FullFatPhil · 31/08/2023 18:55

@explainthistomeplease I live on the coast too. In a holiday town. I use the sea and beaches regularly.

Our waters are often shit free but thanks to the water boards and this government, not often enough. The south coast today is appalling and it is intentional discharges of sewage by the water board. So many holidaymakers unaware too. Vile.

That map is shocking.

Perplexed0 · 31/08/2023 19:52

Sounds like most people do the same things and relax the same amount but just in different places. But some might say one holiday is more boring than the other. The only difference being language, climate, architecture and different type of water (sea, lake, river). Unless people are thinking about fun activities which they don’t seem to be mentioning! Folk are strange sometimes. Just live your own lives and don’t concern yourselves with others’…

suckrifice · 31/08/2023 20:00

ManyATrueWord · 31/08/2023 19:45

Back at you, @suckrifice . People who criticise others don't do so because they are happy on themselves

I don’t think this is true in this case. Op is obviously happy going on holidays in the UK. Her friend is obviously happy going on holidays abroad.

It might even be that op took it as criticism, whilst her friend made an (ill) attempt to broaden op’s horizon and did not mean it as criticism at all. Who knows.

To say that all people who criticise others don't do so because they are happy on themselves, is a bit narrow minded. It’s not all black and white.

suckrifice · 31/08/2023 20:04

Gingerlygreen · 31/08/2023 18:57

You couldn't pay me to go abroad and those who just sit by a pool all day and only move to eat and drink are my idea of boring.
However as others have said it's a good thing we're all different and she was very rude to say that to you, some people make themselves feel better by making others feel bad.

It's rather ott though to say you don't feel the same now about your holiday to Cornwall

You do know you can go ’abroad’ and not sit by a pool? You’re welcome to go abroad and learn dog sledding or build your own igloo or whatever. I recommend it.

Original poster
SusanandMidge · 31/08/2023 20:16

JanesBlond · 31/08/2023 18:01

Each to their own but personally I would find it boring to just hang around a cottage and go to the pub. We sometimes holiday in the U.K. but if we do we are out walking, visiting historic sites etc.

Why do you worry around flights and passports etc? Perhaps your friend was concerned that undue anxiety was holding you back from experiencing things?

Where did I say we just hang around the cottage and to to the pub? We drive around, visit historical places, places that have been mentioned in novels etc., walk along beaches, go for cliff walks, and sometimes enjoy relaxing in our cottage garden and wandering down to the pub etc.

Anyhow thank you everyone. This thread has put everything in perspective. I have realised I have friends who go to the usual resorts in Spain and the Canaries every year, friends who have time shares or holiday cottages and go there every year, friends who visit children in the States/Australia every year, friends who go golfing in Portugal every year, friends who enjoy throwing everything in the car and driving around every year and friends who try different places and enjoy action packed holidays every year. I don't particularly want to do the latter but as long as we all like what we do every year that's great.

Anyone commenting or deriding other people's choices as 'boring' probably lack imagination and that's fine too. We're all different.

OP posts:
Gingerlygreen · 31/08/2023 20:19

suckrifice · 31/08/2023 20:04

You do know you can go ’abroad’ and not sit by a pool? You’re welcome to go abroad and learn dog sledding or build your own igloo or whatever. I recommend it.

Show quote history

And I recommend reading a post properly before misquoting it.

Where did I say you couldn't do anything other than sit by a pool?

Gingerlygreen · 31/08/2023 20:32

Crikeyalmighty · 31/08/2023 19:14

@Gingerlygreen that's a bit dramatic to say you couldn't pay me to go abroad- not all hols are fly and flops- any particular reason why you aren't interested in abroad at all- not even city breaks or the Alps or similar - ? Not criticising, I'm more curious.

I have been abroad, I've been to America twice and France a couple of times and as I replied to another poster I know that going abroad doesn't mean you have to just sit on a beach.

I am simply happier at home and love the UK, I don't enjoy going on really long journeys or airports or crowds or heat, I enjoy the simple things and my favourite holidays are in a cottage in the Lakes or overlooking the Welsh hills or like the op go to Cornwall outside of the school holidays.

TheWayoftheLeaf · 31/08/2023 21:10

Don't let it ruin your holiday.

I travel for work to all sorts of beautiful exotic places (Thailand, Turkey, Serbia, Maldives just this year).

Me and DP still go to Cornwall every summer for a week. We love it. We enjoy wales and Scotland in a camper van too!

Both types of holiday have their merits. Both are wonderful to enjoy. Neither is better or worse.