What’s a reasonable curfew for 12 year old

[Mumofteensendhelp]

I have said 7pm
unless at a friends house or at a club when I’m more flexible
dd thinks I’m being far too strict and says her friends are allowed out until 9pm which shocks me!

DS is 12, his is 8pm whilst it's light in the evening.

What kind of place do you live in ?
I think 9pm during the summer holidays is fine but it's going to be pitch black way before 7pm soon so that should be late enough.

My eldest is the same age. I’ve said 6pm as a general rule (thinking of the nights drawing in soon) but will sometimes allow until 7 or later if he’s at someone’s house and gets a lift home. My son also thinks I’m massively unreasonable but I don’t care if some are allowed out until 9. He needs to be home for tea at a reasonable hour, get homework etc done and most of all, be safe! X

It depends on a number of factors...
Will they have eaten?
If not, what time do you eat your evening meal?
Do they have homework?
How are they getting home?

I said 6 all the while it was light.

I don't think a blanket curfew is possible at this age- doesn't it depend what they're doing?

And surely it's later if they're at someone else's house?

10pm in the holidays. Really depends where they are. Mine are at friends houses then don't mind 10pm on Friday or Saturday. My one rule is no hanging around streets though

During the week mine mainly at activities but if homework is done and they have eaten then it's 9pm

I think it depends on circumstances. I generally wfh until 6pm and on those days during light nights we eat about 7.30/8. My DD is 10. She gets in from school, I always have a snack plate ready for her, then she goes out to play until 7. Comes in has a shower, pjs on and then we have dinner. She then relaxes with a book/tv until 9. Then it's bed. Will be earlier soon as I don't like her being out in the dark at all. I stay in a village and she is at the park which is end of my street (tiny street) x

My 11 year was out until about 9 o’clock the beginning of the summer holidays but that’s gradually been moved earlier now it’s starting to go dark. Now she has to be in at 8:20. When the dark nights come in my rule has always been if it’s dark enough for the streetlights to be on then it’s too dark for you to be out. Obviously if they are in a friends house it’s abit different but that all depends on how they are getting home from there.

Surely it depends what they're doing? 12yo Dts can go into town during the day but they need to be home or at a friends house before the shops shut.

They don't have a curfew, if they're at a friends they'll stay over or get dropped off when the other parents ask.

Depends. I’ve seen so many little thugs hanging around the retail parks recently up to no good, so unless at someone’s house or at an activity such as football at the Astro pitch then I’d say as soon as it’s getting dark and 7pm is fine. But if at a house or activity then 8.30/9 okay too.

9/10 depending on what they're doing and who they're with.

As everyone else has said it depends on lots of things

9pm on light evenings
6pm in dark winter
9pm if at a friends doing something and can get home?
10pm if weekend and at someone’s house and can get home?
6pm if a shed load of homework.
No regular time really. Although before dark generally speaking.

I think in this instance 7pm is a reasonable.

Allows a chance to show she can play by rules then in the future you can talk about extensions.

I think that's quite early. Ds11 is allowed out with friends until 8pm. It was 8.30 over the summer.
He's only allowed to go to a couple of places- the local park, the corner shop or a handful of friends.
As it gets darker he'll have to be home earlier.

8 o'clock. Half past if other kids are still out and it's light enough and there's no school the following day. Earlier in the winter, unless they're just at a friend's house.

My 13 year old has to be home before it's dark, if he wants to stay out later at a friends he rings first to check I am able to pick him up. Usually 9 at the latest.

I have a 13 year old and he has to be home by 7pm in the summer can stay out later if arranged beforehand but he is either dropped home or picked up.

He has no problem with this as majority of his friends have the same curfew.

When the street lights go on is our rule

I think 7pm is very early. 9pm should be fine in the summer.

DD11 is out locally until 8pm

Genuinely interested, where are 12yo's until 8/9pm at night? Mine have never just gone 'out', they are either at sports clubs or at I friends. They don't hang around so just interested in what others do. This isn't a dig just different to what we are used to. If mine go into town they come home or go to a friends house when the shops shut.

The park, the beach, the football pitches etc.

We have 6 year olds out until 8pm in the holidays on my estate so 7pm does sound early to me, but we're in a small village where everyone knows everyone and watches the kids playing from windows.