Would you say this was harassment or harmless (unwanted) flirting?

[Pizzahut345]

I was doing some work in a summer school, tutoring in a language. On my first day, a male teacher there who I'd just met asked me my name and what subject I was teaching. I replied and then he said 'And how do you say you're beautiful in that language?'
I was embarrassed and didn't know what to say, he just laughed and then walked off, never saw him since.
I'm sure he didn't mean any harm, I should take it as a compliment, it was just a bit unwanted and especially in a professional environment.

Another teacher there.. I talked to him for all of 5 minutes, just very basic stuff, when did you start here etc.
I walked out the door and he'd already started following me on social media about 5 minutes after I met him. Just too much.

I would have been quite flattered but probably quite relieved that I didn't see him again as I'd have felt uncomfortable if I thought he fancied me and I had to work with him. I wouldn't see it as harassment though if it was a one off

Yeah maybe harassment was a strong choice of word... I'd never met or spoken to him prior to that.

It’s inappropriate but not harassment.

I think just a corny line, probably no offence intended.

Yeah, maybe harassment would only apply if it were repeated. Inappropriate is a better way to put it.

I'll try not to overthink it.
The immediate follow request on social media was creepy though! He'd looked me up the minute I left.

Sorry what?..

Unprofessional and inappropriate but it would only be harassment if he kept doing it I think. As a one off it’s just cringey.

Maybe make your SM a bit more secure if you don't want relative strangers following you.

I work in residential summer schools and as it's an intense month or so with everyone being together 24/7 friendships and social groups do tend to form very instantaneously.

Five minutes?

I should.. I think he found me via the school's page.

Yeah, 5 minutes, if that! Just met him in the staffroom very briefly.

I'd make your SM private if you don't want strangers following you.

And also, you all need some sort of policy about phones at work.

Get the confidence to call out inappropriate behaviour. It isn't a compliment that random men find you fuckable. So you don't have to accept it. A "yeah that's not in appropriate at all", will do it.

Yeah.. I feel like women are conditioned to just laugh politely at this sort of stuff, but we shouldn't.
The guy was on his break during that time.
I am changing my name on there tonight!

Goodness, I am an absolute sucker for a witty line but would not be flattered in any way at all by such a corny line.

I'd probably say something along the lines of 'and I'd want you to know that because?'

In the unlikely case that I did want to signal interest I'd probably say, sorry, I only know how to say someone is handsome in that language.

Much more importantly ...

I happen to know a good few teachers in RL and am facebook friends with some of them. None of them have FaceBook profiles which are searchable. Even so, they will not accept friend requests from people whose security is not locked down, so that for example, they only allow you to see mutual friends and do not show who else they have as friends on FaceBook

I'm surprised that your school or organisation does not have policies which are v v restrictive.

Do please get up to speed on this kind of this as a matter of urgency

Not deed poll no 😂

Well, obviously, if the man the OP was talking about had said he found her fuckable, then he should have been called out.
He didn't.

An icy stare and a ‘that’s inappropriate, don’t you think?’ would be a good response if it happens again. And blocking him (as well as securing your sm) would send a very clear message that you’re not prepared to be spoken to like that. If he wouldn’t ask a man how they would say somebody was good looking in their native tongue, or a female boss, then he shouldn’t be asking you. It’s not a compliment.