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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want someone to visit who has bedbugs

43 replies

sarrys · 25/08/2023 11:16

My aunty has just been battling bedbugs, trying to get rid, has been doing it herself rather than hiring someone.

She wants to visit. I am terrified of her bringing them into our home. We have a baby, well even if we didnt i wouldnt want it of course but if we had to fumigate whilst keeping the baby out that would be a nightmare!

I dont know anything about them but a quick google search tells me people can bring them into your home.

Aibu to say no? But when will it be safe to have her over?

OP posts:
RitzyMcFitzy · 25/08/2023 11:20

YANBU

'I love you Auntie, but I'm not keen on the company you keep'.

Seriously, if she's been battling bedbugs surely she'd have the sense to not want to pass that misery on to someone else'.

MrsSkylerWhite · 25/08/2023 11:21

Nope. Hell would freeze over first. She gets exterminators in. Until then and clean bill, no visits.

RitzyMcFitzy · 25/08/2023 11:22

doing it herself rather than hiring someone.

So, not doing it in all likelihood.

Itsjustme83 · 25/08/2023 11:22

I would not be wanting her to visit either !! They are a nightmare to get rid of and will be in her case , her clothes and all belongings. People catch them in hotels in this situation and take them home with them In their stuff.

Catlord · 25/08/2023 11:25

No, sorry. She needs to get the house professionally sorted first. Bedbugs are hell. It was bad enough dealing with them for a few weeks in a scuzzy student flatshare! You don't want to be bringing those little bastards into your permanent home whilst coping with a baby too.

ChaToilLeam · 25/08/2023 11:27

No, she needs to get it professionally sorted and is not welcome till then.

Perhaps that will be an incentive for her to deal with them properly. Who wants bedbugs in their house, FFS?

Prelapsarianhag · 25/08/2023 11:47

No. She has a bug plague - tell her to keep it to herself.

Birdkin · 25/08/2023 12:00

Do not let her visit! Having bedbugs is hell. We had them as a child and my parents tried to get rid of them themselves. It didn’t work, it was honestly traumatic (I didn’t sleep properly for months) and I dread to think how many people we spread them to accidentally. Tell her she isn’t coming round till a professional has sorted out her house!

ClaribelLowLieth · 25/08/2023 12:17

NO FUCKING WAY

Like PP I wouldn't wish them on anyone - they will literally send you mad

ManateeFair · 25/08/2023 12:21

Is she asking to just come over for a couple of hours, or is she asking to stay the night? I certainly wouldn't have her staying the night, for obvious reasons.

I don't know much about bedbugs (thank god I've never had to deal with any!) so I've no idea whether it's easy to spread them from house to house by having someone just pop in for a cup of tea or something - but if it is, then that would also be a big fat no from me too.

The fact that she is trying to deal with them herself instead of getting it properly sorted is making me itch just thinking about it.

RumandSpinach · 25/08/2023 12:23

Is it that she hasn't the funds? Exterminators are expensive and don't always work. Bedbugs hide bloody everywhere and some are becoming resistant to poisons

Cimexa is effective and cheap. If she buys it with a dust blower and n95 mask should get change from £50.

But no - she can't visit before its properly sorted.

Original poster
sarrys · 25/08/2023 12:49

Basically she is saying my cousin came over to help her bag everything up. And everything is washed. She said they are not in the house at all anymore... my question is how does she know!

OP posts:
ImABox · 25/08/2023 12:51

Tell her you’ll meet her in a cafe. Just nope.

ImABox · 25/08/2023 12:51

Did she wash her mattress by putting it in the washing machine? Nope, doesn’t fit? Then she hasn’t dealt with them

Brightredtulips · 25/08/2023 12:53

No! Absolutely not allow.

Lindy2 · 25/08/2023 12:53

God no.

Bedbugs is a real fear of mine. I always check for them if we stay anywhere.

I would not risk them being brought into my home.

mindutopia · 25/08/2023 12:55

No absolutely not. It's hellish. I was working abroad and the flat below us got them, so we got them too. Truly one of the worst experiences of my life. I had scars from the bites for years after. It took the landlord sending pest control in who basically stripped the flat of all linens and soaked the mattresses and sofa/soft furnishings in pesticides, not once, but twice, to finally get rid of them. No way in hell would I consider bringing that onto myself again.

MegaPixie09 · 25/08/2023 12:56

As someone who had bedbugs once, do NOT go there.

It is absolutely not worth the risk. I’m still traumatised by the whole ordeal and it wasn’t even a big infestation.

She needs to get someone in professionally. I tried to do it myself and was fine for 10 days before I woke up covered in bites. Had to have a professional come 3 times! In the end we discovered they were hiding in the bed frame in the tiniest gaps! Had to throw the whole thing out. Itchy just thinking about it

partypompoms · 25/08/2023 12:59

Jesus this is frightening me. I'm going to google them and see how to avoid

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 25/08/2023 12:59

Oh goodness. No no no. Absolutely not!

however:

if my aunt was trying to sort this out alone due to financial issues, I would offer to help. Only applies if that’s something you could comfortably afford to do, obviously.

bed bugs are horrible, a pain to get rid of and unfortunately cost money…

gamerchick · 25/08/2023 13:00

MegaPixie09 · 25/08/2023 12:56

As someone who had bedbugs once, do NOT go there.

It is absolutely not worth the risk. I’m still traumatised by the whole ordeal and it wasn’t even a big infestation.

She needs to get someone in professionally. I tried to do it myself and was fine for 10 days before I woke up covered in bites. Had to have a professional come 3 times! In the end we discovered they were hiding in the bed frame in the tiniest gaps! Had to throw the whole thing out. Itchy just thinking about it

Same with stepson. Hiding in the bedframe. They like to sit on the ceiling as well.

No way I'd be inviting the chance of bedbugs into the house. Little fuckers travel, like fleas do.

Perfectweatherforducks · 25/08/2023 13:01

My friends parents brought bed bugs back from their travels abroad. They got rid of them themselves but it was an absolute process which took months and they had to be absolutely meticulous. I'm still not sure why they didn't just hire pest control as they had to throw out mattresses and seal off certain rooms for 6 weeks whilst heating their conservatory up to 50 degrees and putting everything in there.

I would absolutely say no to her visit. Her bed maybe bed bug free for now but they live behind skirting boards, plug sockets and light switches...

Ponoka7 · 25/08/2023 13:05

No, I've had bedbugs, they were more common in the 70's, they can live in stored linen for over a year. We found live ones in my Nans when clearing out her house, she'd gone from care home, to funeral, so they definitely had no contact with food. A lot of the products aren't great or can be used at all if children under 3 are in the house. She's bloody selfish.

Totalwasteofpaper · 25/08/2023 13:10

Absolutely not.

My filth bag cousin came to stay at my mums and brought them into our house. It was HELL, getting rid of them was also hell. This thread has all the memories coming back....

There is no way i would let ANYONE stay in our house if they had been in contact/exposed to bed bugs. Do not let her stay

Parky04 · 25/08/2023 13:19

We had bed bugs in every single bedroom and the living room. It was hell. Cost us around £3k to finally get rid of them. Never, ever want to see one again!

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