To do this,

[Isitseptember]

Move my kids out of their nice modest family home. Move into council or housing where they would have to share a room.
Possibly give up access to car, no holidays when they are used to 2 a year.
Live off benefits, when they are used to days, meals out every week.
Or stay together as a family in a loveless relationship.

Do you own your current modest home?
Are you married?
Are you working?
Would you be able to split custody of the children?

For what it's worth I don't think it's ever worth staying in a loveless relationship.

It’s not necessarily either/or between those extremes.

Do you own your current home?
How old are the DC?
Why would you assume council housing?
Nothing really wrong with sharing a room.
Why would they get no holidays or trips?
Why would you/they be living off benefits?
Can you not work?

You need to tell us why, Op.

If you can tolerate it, stay where you are for now. Enjoy the modest house, holidays etc. But start hobbies/activities etc just for you, so when the time does arrive you eventually leave, you'll have things to occupy yourself.

You'd be lucky to get a council house/flat sadly. The lists are extremely long.

Could you not put money away first then leave?

It's not as easy just to get a council house, I have been in the highest band for 8 months, there are no council houses, it's a mess. Maybe you'd be better off moving into a private if your looking for a quick "exit". If you're in a loveless relationship and/or arguing frequently, your children might welcome the idea of you and your OH splitting up ? I obviously do not know your situation though and I'm aware it's not always clear cut.

those are not the only two options!

questions as above.

is he happy, would he be happier to divirce?

A loveless marriage can be wide ranges of a spectrum. We need more info. Does his treatment of you damage you? Or could you live in the marriage but use your freedom to get on with life on your own terms?

Are you fleeing domestic violence and would have to give up them things if you left?

I'd have to give then up I own nothing & unmarried, I am pregnant , due soon and will return to work once baby is old enough.
But will only be on low income and rent is so high.

No violence

Nothing is clear . It the home your in now owned, mortgage, rented. If you separate if you would be the main parent can you stay in the house and he move out?

I think we need more details to be able to try to advise.

He owns the home so I would leave @Summa23

@Summa23

You won't get a council house for a minimum of 2-5 years from homeless.

But YANBU to remove them from a loveless household - you'll just have to find an alternative housing option.

Ok . Of you was going homless route. He would have to write you a letter saying you and the children can't stay there. You will then be put into emgency accommodation. During this time they look into your situation and decide if they owe you a duty. If they do you will then be able to bid on property's. But they can also help you to find private rent . And it can take many many years to gry housed via the council/social housing.

Wow 2-5 years 🙈

If it's loveless but not abusive, I'd probably stay for the foreseeable and plan an exit when it is more practical.

I don't think you'll get a council house, you might get a single room BnB type accommodation.

Have you used the Entitled To app to look at what benefits you'd get?

I would probably stick it out in a loveless (but safe) marriage until I had returned to work. I would also look at career training/courses while on mat leave. I'm not saying that you should start any training with a newborn but exit with a strategy.

How many DC and ages?
Do you have any qualifications?

I don't think you'd qualify for a council house or at least not be high on the list.

Much longer depending on where you are

Even in my case, violence ExH tried to kill me,I had to spend a year in emergency accommodation, before being housed with 2 young kids. My youngest DD lived in the town where she was born, single parent private renting,was on council housing list 10 years, offered nothing.

Why are your aspirations so low and why do you think the world owes you anything? Did you think any of this through before deciding to bring another child into the world?