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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I can’t improve my body at 40?

131 replies

Fatatforty · 23/08/2023 21:03

I am 5 foot 2, at 25 I was a size 8 and 8 stone. 2 kids later and 40 years old I am 10 and a half stone and a size 14. I am also wobbly, and covered in cellulite with an overhanging stomach. I tried a bikini on for my holiday today and cried. My body just looks so pasty and un toned.

I Am disappointed as for the last 12 weeks I have been going to the gym twice a week and I cannot notice any difference. Do I just need to give it longer? The trainer gave me a routine of leg press, leg abductor, chess press, shoulder press, and i also do 10 minutes on the cross trainer as a warm up and cool down.

Diet wise I have tried slimming world but don’t enjoy all the cooking, and calorie counting but I get hungry and go over every day. I’m starting to feel like this is it for me, am I being unreasonable for thinking it’s just too difficult to get the body I want.

OP posts:
BogRollBOGOF · 24/08/2023 14:06

Any exercise you do is good for health.
If you've got specific goals then you need to regularly review what you do. Play with the number of reps and weight as exercises feel easier. I find gyms dull and hard for motivation so a group setting works better for me for weights. Running, I find more flexible and easy for goal setting so can do that solo.

Exercising in your 40s is an essential stage of keeping mobile, keeping strength and maintaining muscle and bone density into later adulthood. Good muscle mass does help maintain metabolic weight too. Exercise helps maintain weight, but is a small part in reducing it.

I don't diet. But sometimes I have to focus on nutrition and on adjusting habits. There is a slight distinction. I don't have to change everything in one go. That means I don't "cheat" or "fail". It's about trying to remember the role of water and nutrients in my lifestyle, and aiming for better not perfect.

Water and good hydration is essential to break down fat. Reduce sweet drinks be it sugar/ juice/ sweetners. Your body will metabolise sugars (inc in juice) first. Sugar spikes and crashes stimulate appetite within a few hours. Artificial sweetners can replicate those effects on the body and increase cravings.

Use naturally low calorie vegetables and some fruit to fill up on fibre. Then add proteins and healthy (less processed fats). I'm not anti-carb, but it is easy to consume too much. Carbs have a prominent place on the food pyramid because they were useful and cheap for filling up the post-war population when food was less abundant. If you have plenty of fibre, protein and fat on your plate, you don't need so many carbs.

Don't ban things, but work out how to fit them into your life in practical portions, e.g. save for the weekend.

Eat food as close to its natural state as possible. Reduce processing- the more recognisable the ingedients, the better.
Cooking doesn't have to take hours. If time is limited, frozen veg/ stirfries are a great time saver and often frozen in a fresher state than the food in the "fresh" section. Avoid artificually processed "low fat", the fat will sate you better and you eat less of it long run.

You don't have to change everything in one go and it's easier to tweak one habit at a time and it also makes it less likely that all habits will collapse at once when life gets in the way because special occasions, illness, busy phases etc are all inevitable.

Being small makes it hard going because you need less energy to survive than average, but you still want to eat "normally" and enjoy food. It takes a lot of patience.

WithIcePlease · 24/08/2023 14:19

Certainly possible.
There are studies of folk in nursing homes in their 70's with significant results doing basic body weight moves.

I'm with the high protein and progressive overload faction on here.
3-4 sessions of weights a week and longish walks at the weekend
No upf or sugar, loads of veg/salad for volume plus lean meat and fish
I'm nearer to 60 than 50 and my body has never been as muscled as it is now with good definition.

MissMogwai · 24/08/2023 14:49

We've all been there! I'm 44 and piled on 3 stone during lockdown. I tried slimming world, exante shakes and I just didn't stick to it at all.

I ended up signing up to a sponsored swim as then I knew I'd have to do it and it was the best thing I've done. I built up to it and I go 4 times a week, swimming up to a mile each session. I love it.

I've lost 2 stone so far, I'm much more toned and I eat well. I do go for meals out, have the odd take away and go for drinks but I feel so balanced, healthy, and strong.

I think it's finding something you enjoy and then you feel so good you just want to keep doing it. The main benefit for me is my energy and mindset are so much improved that's it's had an impact on most aspects of my life.

Saysoe · 24/08/2023 15:10

Or just accept it and move on with this stage of your life, buying more flattering clothes to suit your shape.

PaminaMozart · 24/08/2023 15:31

But it isn't about looks,@Saysoe - it's about health

soberfabulous · 24/08/2023 15:56

Totally possible!

I'm 47 and fitter than I was at 27.

Like others have said: sorry to say but twice a week isn't enough exercise. I work out 4 times a week, a mixture of gym, running, tennis , Pilates even adult ballet which I'm rubbish at but love.

Running is easy and free.

Make healthy food choices, intermittent fasting.

It's a mindset thing and I do it for my mental health and my heart.

The physical benefits are secondary...but helpfully they also motivate me too. I don't want to slide into middle age looking like a sofa.... 🤪

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