Would you move in with grandparents up north to save £20k?

[Woolwichchicken]

I am really in 2 minds and I don't know what to do.

I currently rent a 2 bed for £1.6k in London and there is barley anything left after bills. I early 2.3k after tax. My partner works part time and is going in to his last year of uni.

I am feeling so down that I probably won't be able to buy a house ever etc. I don't have family to give me money for a deposit and I don't qualify for a council house either.

My home town is up north and my work have an office in the town. My grandparents have offered for me to move in with them. I would be able to save 1.8k a month as I can walk across the whole town, so won't need public transport. And I would have no bills (they have insisted).

I could even save more than that but I was factoring trains to London to see my partner and friends.

I have a daughter going in to year 1, and her dad could drive up each weekend, and then we could go to London too. So she would still see him regularly. My grandparents said they would do the school run (if she got into the school that is on their street) which would save £70 per week in wrap around care. But my jobs is also flexible so I could do half the week.

We were thinking after the year he could move up north or atleast we would have a good amount towards a deposit (obviously it would be my money and I would get this noted in the deeds, or however it is done.)

Would you move up for the year to save the money?
YABU - I would not
YANBU - I would do it

Darlington! I work for the civil service.

How up north is up north? Are we talking somewhere like Sheffield or Preston, or Carlisle or Berwick-on-Tweed?

Cross-posted! Do it.

I think it depends on your relationship with your dp because this would be almost separating from him. I'm really attached to my dh so if it were me I'd rather rent a tiny place with him in London than have to live apart. (I'm originally from a part of the world where people live in tiny flats so I'm used to it).

I think if you do this plan, consider that it might affect your closeness with your dp. Do you see yourself staying with him, marriage etc? Or is it more of an amicable coparenting friendship type scenario?

It sounds very doable. Train service is good. Book in advance and you can get cheap deals. Friends and family railcard for you & DD plus a student railcard for him - don't recommend driving it just for 2 nights, traffic is hideous and it's knackering.

It seems like it would be a move that would eventually benefit all of you, so it’s probably worth the temporary separation and travel if it’s just for a year. Initially I thought your dc’s father was your ex - in that case I would have said no.

No, but perhaps for 100k+

Presumably Christmas and Easter DP would come up and stay for longer and the academic year ends mid June so would only be for 9 months?

It all depends on your relationship with your grandparents. Are they wealthy? If not, then having two extra people to feed might be expensive for them. You will feel guilty buying anything for yourself if you're not paying any rent.

Have you looked at the cost of train tickets for that journey?

Loads and loads of civil service jobs in Darlington. and a direct train to London. I would do it in your shoes, sim for a chunky deposit. But only if your DP is signed up to living away from London longer term?

What are school options like? Are there spaces near Grandparents house?

Well yes - this. £20k won't get you anything as a deposit in London unless he qualifies straight into a good income, so this isn't for a year, it's forever.

No.

I would do it and save like mad. Keep an eye on the trains for cheap tickets, I wouldn’t drive if I was him, I bet he can get the train cheaper than petrol.

A quick look and if he has a railcard and he books ahead there are return tickets for £40-50.

Yes, definitely. Do it.
Will be nice for your child to experience time with your grandparents too.
Good luck!

Okay that makes it easier since partner and dad are the same person. Are your grandparents fine with partner also more or less living with you? Uni is a pretty short year and there are lots of breaks where he could be with you if he comes north whenever not in class. Does he see himself realistically coming north that often - how far of a drive for a weekend?

I think you can make it work for the year he is in uni to save with the longer term goal of moving back out once he is done.

yes 100 % i would

why cant he change unis for the last year? many do?

think of it like a 1 year adventure and then review it - apply for schools asaap and get moving - i would not be spending 2k a month on rent just cause its london! life is too short - move!

Oh my gosh don't hesitate, it sounds amazing.

If you don't move in with them I will.

I would do it. It sounds a great idea. We are going to do that soon but on bigger scale... toddler and I will go and stay with my parents abroad and my DH stays here. Every few months we travel to visit each other.

I think it could work if you are both invested in making it work.

The spanner in the works would be if he suddenly starts acting like he's single with you and his child living far away.

I think in theory it sounds great.

In practice, the going to and from London, assuming you're talking Manchester or further is very quickly going to feel a drag for all of you. My parents are up north and a weekend never feels worth it for the journey.
I think I'd want to get more than £20k out of it.

This

Definitely