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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To let DS (17) catch the train to Wembley?

61 replies

Fruitflylady · 15/08/2023 16:18

…because his girlfriend’s DM wants them to be driven there. It’s an hour and a half by car, 2 hours by train. They’re being collected afterwards but I can’t fathom why two sensible 17 yr-olds can’t be allowed to find their way there in public transport.
Also, I hate driving into London.

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 16/08/2023 09:42

Its really up to them if they want to ferry them about.

KitchenSinkLlama · 16/08/2023 09:45

They are setting their daughter up for a life of anxiety. Poor girl. I hope she is able to break free.

Topseyt123 · 16/08/2023 10:30

Fruitflylady · 16/08/2023 09:39

Update; GF’s DF is taking and returning them both in his car. I’m trying not to feel guilty/bad for him, but I still think it’s a waste of time driving them there in the afternoon.

Good result IMHO.

Don't feel guilty. If he is daft enough to drive to Wembley on the day of a major concert then that's his problem. Maybe when he hits the traffic on the North Circular and around Hangar Lane Gyratory he will learn his lesson and his DD will finally be allowed to use trains like so many other people.

HonoriaLucastaDelagardie · 16/08/2023 13:32

Good result IMHO.

I don't think so. It's controlling and infantilising. DS and GF can't plan their day as they want to, can't speak freely in front of DF. And it's an unnecessary car journey, so adding to pollution.

OP, please impress on your son that he should in no way feel obliged to offer to contribute to petrol/parking costs. He didn't want this or ask for this.

BacktoBeginnersFran · 16/08/2023 14:37

I agree with @HonoriaLucastaDelagardie. I don't think it's a good result at all! Especially not for the two 17 year olds who can't be trusted to travel to a well attended (& presumably policed) concert that's within commuting distance.
It's ridiculous!!

Delatron · 16/08/2023 14:40

I just don’t understand this! Have they said why they don’t want her catching the train? How ridiculous.

ManateeFair · 16/08/2023 14:46

Fruitflylady · 16/08/2023 09:39

Update; GF’s DF is taking and returning them both in his car. I’m trying not to feel guilty/bad for him, but I still think it’s a waste of time driving them there in the afternoon.

Oh god, don't feel guilty - it's not your fault that her parents are weirdos and don't think two almost-adult teenagers are capable of boarding a train.

ManateeFair · 16/08/2023 14:57

CheeseMuffin · 15/08/2023 17:13

If OP means the stadium it's not remotely dodgy! The whole area around it has been done up with restaurants and a shopping centre. There's even a Box Park!

Show quote history

Even if the area was 'dodgy' it would still absolutely not be unsafe on an afternoon when tens of thousands of people are going to a concert there, because at no point would you be anywhere that wasn't really busy with crowds of other concert-goers. Even at the end of the gig you'd be walking back to the Tube with a massive crowd of other people who have all been to the same event as you. Plus, the whole area will be full of police and stewards.

LlynTegid · 16/08/2023 18:42

Saddened for your DSs GF. Imagining that once she leaves the family home for a job or university she may struggle with normal things.

Hope they both enjoy the gig.

Zanatdy · 16/08/2023 18:50

My kids travelled to Bangladesh last summer on their own, changing flights in Dubai, age 14 & 17. Then DD travelled there on her own in February this year age 15 (but direct). Both been travelling on train for a few years, able to navigate the tube. My son says nearly all of his Uni friends get picked up for short holidays home (so don’t need to pack their stuff up, just a small bag needed) and some of them have never travelled on a train in their lives. Very odd to me. Even me growing up in the sticks in Wales I was travelling by trains on my own well before 17

Zanatdy · 16/08/2023 18:54

Fruitflylady · 15/08/2023 17:54

The outing is nothing to do with us either; it’s GF’s fave band they’re going to see. DS has paid for his own ticket. I’ve offered to pay for their train tickets, but she still wants us to drive them there…🙄

I drove into Wembley once for a Take That concert. Never again, back all the way up to the M4 turn off and we almost missed some of the concert. We missed all of the support band. Thank god we left with a couple of hours to spare or we would have missed it. If she’s insistent on them being driven she drives. No way would I drive 2 perfectly fit 17yr olds into london when they can get a train, in broad day light!

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