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AIBU?

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Original poster

Husband annoyed over teaching etiquette

104 replies

ClassicStripe · 15/08/2023 08:17

This year only me and one other colleague have swapped classrooms. That meant that we were the only people who needed to prep our rooms. Everyone else just had a little bit of house keeping to do.
For this reason, I have gone in to school to work on my room 3 times over the holidays. NOTE: not once has my husband had to look after our children while I'm there nor has it made a jot of difference to his schedule.

Last night he got really angry with me about going in to school in the holidays. He said I shouldn't be doing it and should do it in September (When? We have two full days of training and then the kids are back in!). He was really cross with me for not taking a stand and refusing to sort my classroom in the holidays.
This has made me feel so fed up as obviously I would rather not go in but the classroom needs to be up to standards for the class to come back in. I find it so frustrating that he can't see it from my point of view at all and just insinuates I'm weak for going in.
For what it's worth, he works in the private sector and gets paid a nice amount for over time and has some really good perks.

OP posts:
Screamingabdabz · 15/08/2023 17:17

Beamur · 15/08/2023 11:17

This may be part of the expectations around teaching and it probably is necessary - but the fact that teachers consistently have to work many hours beyond their contracted hours is a problem. Your professionalism is admirable but it is exploited by the system.
Really you shouldn't have to work in your time off because the way schools operate doesn't facilitate you sufficient time to do this - or have the staff to do this kind of task.
Your husband shouldn't be angry at you but he has a valid point.

Exactly. Dumb and exploitative expectations of unpaid hours and superhuman levels of keenness and enthusiasm are what is driving loads of newly qualified teachers to leave the profession and burned out teachers to experience unholy levels of mental ill
health.

Your DH is right to be angry and it’s a shame that so many teachers are so blind to the fact that their desperate need to be conscientious actually exacerbates the problem.

Dee9409 · 15/08/2023 20:18

Seashor · 15/08/2023 17:01

I’m with your husband. I work hard during term time but I refuse to go in during the holidays. I don’t see it as my classroom but a class that I teach in. Any preparation that anyone wants me to do to the classroom is NOT done in my own time.

Exactly right Seashore this is how it should be. I am with you on this one.

Dee9409 · 15/08/2023 20:22

Screamingabdabz · 15/08/2023 17:17

Exactly. Dumb and exploitative expectations of unpaid hours and superhuman levels of keenness and enthusiasm are what is driving loads of newly qualified teachers to leave the profession and burned out teachers to experience unholy levels of mental ill
health.

Your DH is right to be angry and it’s a shame that so many teachers are so blind to the fact that their desperate need to be conscientious actually exacerbates the problem.

Show quote history

I have seen brand new actually fantastic new fresh trainees one after another just have not choice but to leave due to pressure to perform day after day with a smile on their faces while being expected to plan, be trained, given unrealistic workload, they are completely exploited and managers walk into their lessons criticising and then placing more pressure. When they have had a breakdown in the office then being told it is unprofessional to do so then they hide it and they feel depressed that they can’t come in anymore it literally causes anxiety.

Zonder · 15/08/2023 21:15

Seashor · 15/08/2023 17:01

I’m with your husband. I work hard during term time but I refuse to go in during the holidays. I don’t see it as my classroom but a class that I teach in. Any preparation that anyone wants me to do to the classroom is NOT done in my own time.

Are you a secondary teacher?

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