Parents penalised for formula feeding

[thechristmaspudding]

I just wanted to open up a discussion to find out the perspectives of other parents on this subject. I would also be interested to hear the opinions of midwives, health visitors and other health care professionals involved with families.
To give a bit of background information, I am a member of the Boots parenting club, which has many parents are likely to be aware gives you access to discounts and offers on baby related items in store. I went into my local boots today to buy my son's formula, hoping to get a good deal as I had been notified of an offer in store. Now, in my sleep deprived state I did not read the offer properly and it did clearly state that it was an offer for follow on formula and not infant first. The cashier was very polite and explained that due to government regulations shops are not legally allowed to offer discounts on infant first formula due to the government expectation that breastfeeding should be encouraged for the first six months. To be clear, I am not taking issue with Boots or any other shop, but it got me questioning whether this is fair? No, I do not believe that formula companies should be able to dissuade women from breastfeeding through aggressive marketing campaigns that encourage parents to buy their product. But surely parents have the right to weigh up the pros and cons of bottle feeding and make an informed choice that reflects the needs and circumstances of their own family? I tried really, really hard to breastfeed but found it extremely difficult and due to a lack of postnatal support gave up (the inadequate breastfeeding support in this country is another issue in itself). This is something I still regret and struggle with. However, my personal experience aside, formula feeding is a valid choice to make whether parents decide to feed this way from birth or at a later stage.
I also remember watching an episode of dispatches a few years ago on how due to the cost of formula many families resort to watering down their baby's feed or even to stealing. This is a situation that is likely to have worsened as a result of the cost of living crisis.
So my question is, AIBU in thinking that it is wrong to penalise bottle-feeding parents when it comes to the cost of formula?

I exclusively formula feed my son due to the fact he was in the neonatal / NICU at the start of his life on a feeding tube. He wasn’t able to breastfeed because of this but I pumped and we use formula to top up. Formula saved my son, he would have died without it. He didn’t want to latch, even with help and after 7 weeks of bottle combi feeding and my supply dropping due to anxiety I now formula only.

Those stating that BF babies have lower SIDS risks, all these benefits etc are correct. I really do understand why they try and push breastfeeding, if you can do it rather than formula feed and that’s coming from a FF mum.

That being said it’s also a kicker when you buy formula tins or go on formula websites and they state how breastfeeding is better than formula - knowing you aren’t able too and reading that, yes it’s true but can be hard to read. World breastfeeding week was hard for me.

So I do kind of understand why you don’t get extra reward prices on first infant milk, obviously I massively agree formula is extremely expensive. I think I go through a tin every 4/5 days.

It hasn’t triggered me. I did breast feed. I just think those comments are insulting to women that are already feeling vulnerable, disappointed, failing etc. they don’t need to be told that they didn’t try hard enough or phone enough people for help etc.

£46 doesn't seem all that much. I spend far more than that each on food for my kids.

You are absolutely wrong. You may not like the language, and that's understandable, but we take breastfeeding as the baseline, as it's the norm, biologically speaking. So any risks are compared with breastfeeding as the starting point.

I think people should be accounting for the fact that circumstances change in pregnancies sometimes and whilst £46 a month may have been affordable when trying, job losses, shit maternity pay rules etc can result in this being a huge cost.

Personally I had no idea until after my first child was born how expensive formula was. It wasn't talked about at all antenatally. I also didn't know that the formula you saw advertised on TV wasn't meant for newborns.

I acknowledged that women feel they unable to because of not having facts, support and advice.
It doesn't change the fact that it is very rare for a woman to be physically incapable of feeding.

Having children was always going to cost money though and formula companies aren’t obliged to sell their product at cost to compensate for normal life happening to people.

Formula feeding parents should be able to manage the cost of it between two adults, healthy start vouchers, child benefit, universal credit elements related to children and food banks should they need to.

Kids need feeding at some point anyway. I can't really see why formula should be different than cheese sandwiches, potatoes or bananas for older kids. Feeding children is an inevitable expense.

I think the use of artery-clogging palm oil in formula is a scandal

We need to work on helping new mothers not feel like failures when things don’t go according to plan, or indeed if they make the choice to FF from the word go.

We need to be able to talk about comparisons between BFing and FFing, about the dangers of marketing FF, without it being such an emotional trigger for so many women.

There should be no guilt involved for anyone.

The poor standard of support sets women up to struggle, because they’re given very simplistic advice, and common pitfalls aren’t discussed.

Realistic advice should include how to overcome certain issues, should absolutely cover formula feeding, how to make up bottles etc, how to combine BFing and FFing, discuss costs. If everything is out in the open and clear, then women can make an informed choice.
At the moment women aren’t told the realities and typical early difficulties of breastfeeding, it can be difficult to find decent advice, so too many women believe they are among the small number who cannot breastfeed, which should only reflect on the poor standard of care and advice, but leaves mothers, at a vulnerable and stressful time in their lives, feeling like utter shit.

The WHO recommends that counties ban advertising of formula for children under 2 years old and some countries do.

The UK took the stance that they would only ban it for the first six months, mainly due to lobbying from formula companies. Countries that have different bans don't even have follow on formula, the companies invented these to get around the ban, I wouldn't even touch follow on formula as it isn't properly regulated unlike first infant formula which is all they need for the first 12 months anyway, then you can switch to cows milk which is much cheaper.

You are not being penalised only, not given extra rewards or incentives to buy certain brands. If the government where to make it fair, they would ban infant formula advertising completely and make a generic formula avaible for sale at a basic price so companies couldn't profit off it. This would be a much better model also inventing in breastfeeding support in a big way would help. We may have the choice in the UK but there just isn't enough milk production to formula feed all infants around the world. Also supporting more breastfeeding would be better for the overall health of the nation. (Not talking individual cases here people, just the population as a whole).

. Are they still telling women breastfeeding shouldn’t hurt?

See I had the opposite. I kept telling people that there was pain and numbness and they kept saying ‘Oh it should hurt’ ‘That’s just your let down’ as though I couldn’t tell my own body. But they were wrong, there was a an issue and it led to all sorts of serious issues and my son ending up in A&E. The right latch shouldn’t hurt, the problem is people tell you to breastfeed through the pain rather than fixing the latch issues or checking for medical problems.

@ MarleyMallow, that's absolutely right if the latch is good ot shouldn't hurt. If you have a lot of pain you should seek support. Some women do manage by just getting through it, but it's often that babies get better at it as they get a bit older. But you certainly can do things to improve it from the get go.

The UK has the lowest breastfeeding rate in the world mothers who formula feed are in the Majority in the UK and Ireland.

The US, France and Spain all have lower breastfeeding rates than the UK.

Do you have a link with recent figures? It definitely used to be the UK but has maybe changed in recent years. Doesn’t surprise me that the US is low given their lack of maternity leave.

Rates in the UK are still alarmingly low regardless of whether or not they are the lowest.

I BF because it was easy for me. I was FF fed, as were all my siblings, and all my nieces/nephews for a variety of reasons. I don’t care either way.

Some of the sanctimonious preaching by latter BF posters is obnoxious. Do you think all women don’t know these things and it’s your job to educate the masses? You have derailed the thread with your own agenda.

Sometimes it’s personal preference (and why not?) and sometimes it’s challenges with BF. If that’s the case, someone spouting ‘statistically that’s v unlikely’ makes no difference to their lived experience, where help may not have been available or in a timely manner.

Why are you trying to make people feel bad? There are so many choices we all make about our DC and BF is just one of them. All have relative risks.

I think Iceland are lowering the price of first stage formula so that might help parents

The first slap in the face when my breast milk didn't come in was the cost of buying formula.

The second was being told by the women on the till in Sainsbury's that I couldn't have advantage points for the expensive formula as I should be breastfeeding.

The third slap was when I finally managed to squeeze out an ounce of breast milk but had to throw it away as the antibiotics I was taking for the horrific infection in my c-section scar contaminated my milk.

So sometimes breastfeeding just isn't impossible. It would have been nice to have received a discount at some point on the cost of formula, which, no, I hadn't factored into the cost of having a baby. (Does anyone have any idea how expensive babies are until they have one?).

Anyway.., This was all 14 years ago... why am I surprised nothing has changed?

Exactly, £46 to feed a mini human all meals, snacks and drinks for an entire month isn't exactly expensive.

I know some people have unexpected change in circumstances that throw out the best laid plans, but the vast majority don't.

Exactly! And this is what the formula companies know. New parents will just see the advert and remember the brand, not whether it's infant or follow-on. This is why the invention of follow-on milk to get by the marketing rules is so insidious, and the UK government should not have allowed it. To all extents and purposes, we still have formula advertised in this country to brand new parents.

Does anyone know how expensive babies are until they have one?

I think most people have some idea that children cost money, yes? Are you saying you were unaware of the existence of bottle feeding until you gave birth? That's quite unusual, esp in a country like the UK where bottle feeding really common.

The U.K. shouldn’t be incentivising something that is detrimental to public health. There are lots of food and drink products that are heavily taxed and/or have warnings printed on them so it’s not like formula is unique.

However, not getting reward points is absolutely not the same thing as penalising people who formula feed.

This is outrageous . Not every mother can breastfeed.