Parents penalised for formula feeding

[thechristmaspudding]

I just wanted to open up a discussion to find out the perspectives of other parents on this subject. I would also be interested to hear the opinions of midwives, health visitors and other health care professionals involved with families.
To give a bit of background information, I am a member of the Boots parenting club, which has many parents are likely to be aware gives you access to discounts and offers on baby related items in store. I went into my local boots today to buy my son's formula, hoping to get a good deal as I had been notified of an offer in store. Now, in my sleep deprived state I did not read the offer properly and it did clearly state that it was an offer for follow on formula and not infant first. The cashier was very polite and explained that due to government regulations shops are not legally allowed to offer discounts on infant first formula due to the government expectation that breastfeeding should be encouraged for the first six months. To be clear, I am not taking issue with Boots or any other shop, but it got me questioning whether this is fair? No, I do not believe that formula companies should be able to dissuade women from breastfeeding through aggressive marketing campaigns that encourage parents to buy their product. But surely parents have the right to weigh up the pros and cons of bottle feeding and make an informed choice that reflects the needs and circumstances of their own family? I tried really, really hard to breastfeed but found it extremely difficult and due to a lack of postnatal support gave up (the inadequate breastfeeding support in this country is another issue in itself). This is something I still regret and struggle with. However, my personal experience aside, formula feeding is a valid choice to make whether parents decide to feed this way from birth or at a later stage.
I also remember watching an episode of dispatches a few years ago on how due to the cost of formula many families resort to watering down their baby's feed or even to stealing. This is a situation that is likely to have worsened as a result of the cost of living crisis.
So my question is, AIBU in thinking that it is wrong to penalise bottle-feeding parents when it comes to the cost of formula?

Oh come on, that must be so insanely rare and difficult to come by.

I can’t say I’d ever have let my babies be fed with a random’s donated milk.

It’s not that black and white though is it? I breast fed one child until 5. The other was combi fed from birth. Why? Because I was literally unconscious in ICU. Was it impossible to feed? No. Was it a realistic expectation for someone with the the health issues I had? No. Was I penalised? Well that depends on your view. Kid who was BF free. The other where I was gravely unwell cost me money. So yeah it did feel a bit like a punishment.

What I would like to see is a system where mothers are prescribed formula at a cost to the NHS when it’s not a mothers choice but difficulties establishing breastfeeding. if nothing else it will incentivise CCG’s to actually support mothers to feed.

But modified cows milk is absolutely fine?

Yes I agree.
Not sure the government are going to care about this any time soon though!

Everything says "you MAY be entitled" or "you MAY be able to claim". We applied. We were told no. You sending me a screenshot isn't derailing anything. Feel free to speak to the government about what I'm entitled to though.

And the picture you sent is talking about a charge you may have to pay if you earn over 50k. Doesn't actually say everyone who earns under a threshold is entitled to anything.

@willywallaby when my child was a baby we used Aptamil from the very beginning and then tried to switch to Cow and gate as apparently same but cheaper.
I don’t believe it was same as my child was ok on Aptamil but not ok on the Cow and gate ( same type of milk) so went back to Aptamil.
I still remember having the half tab of Cow and gate and binning it.

I do think it's quite disappointing that the rules say no discounts on formula milk. I do understand the reasons but it does make life more expensive for those who are using formula feed and I can see that people could end up tempted to water it down to eke it out.
I had to rely on formula milk when my son was born as I never produced any milk at all. It caused me a great deal of disappointment and anguish at the time. Having the added (and at the beginning very unexpected) expense of formula milk didn't help that any!

I never understand why there are not more angry calls from formula feeders to get companies to reduce profits rather than Boots to gove them points? The formula companies are fleecing mothers.

A very recent study on formula marketing, across a rang of countries including the UK, has been shared by UNICEF and WHO showing just how much effort these companies put into manipulating mothers, distorting science, leveraging online influencers and sabotaging breastfeeding by undermining women’s confidence.

It’s not about penalising you. At a macro health level, breast feeding has better outcomes for mothers and children, including reduction of breast cancer. This is at a macro level (which is what the government care about- an important point to note if you want to understand the why), and doesn’t mean there won’t be individuals where outcomes do not fit within this.

Ultimately it saves the government money and so is encouraged for mums and so there is a reward system (of sorts) in place. You aren’t being penalised- you’re just not getting a discount. Why should you? And it’s not about denying a choice either. You had a choice and you made that. There is reasoning behind it, as unappealing to your own personal situation as that may be.

If someone had medical difficulties preventing them from emptying their bowels would you parrot “in the loo is best?”

Wow,@Dasisr you sound utterly terrible. They’re people too, you know. And it wasn’t just “50years ago in Africa”.

Merseymum seems a nice person. Why is it that rabid breastfeeding fanatics are often such horrible people?

Um, no not at all? I’m not lying? I’m putting about it here should anyone need the help. It’s actually fairly common. I am on a huge breastfeeding group on Facebook and lots of people donate their milk. I think they’re amazing for doing so, I would if I could but I could never pump. It was especially important where there were formula shortages and especially in America when formula was really short for a while.

That’s up to you if you wouldn’t accept a donation, but lots of mums appreciate it because they have babies with dietary issues or because they want to use breastmilk but can’t produce milk themselves or because formula is expensive. It’s a wonderful thing.

You think advertising doesn’t have an impact? Why are people paying £5 more for a tub of formula (Aldi vs Aptamil)

Oh aren’t you pleasant. I meant derail the thread. Was trying to help but you do you hun

Again - difficult is not impossible.

If a woman said to me ‘breastfeeding is so hard is making me depressed’ I’d say ‘fuck that for a game of soldiers’ and match her to the nearest Co op for formula milk. This is why I don’t like ‘breast is best’ - because whilst breastmilk as a substance is for the average baby more beneficial, that doesn’t mean breastfeeding is holistically a better experience. A Baby whose mum is on the brink, who is lactose intolerance, etc will not have a better experience is she continues a struggle than if she just switched he’s to formula.

however - it’s still a choice to formula feed in those circumstances. that’s not nasty - it’s just fact. What is wrong with telling women they chose to feed their baby formula? It’s a valid and perfectly decent choice.

I also think better BF education would reduce the stress and depression many women feel. I know so many women who believe their milk dried up when actually it was just their supply had been established meaning no more leaky Barbie boobs. But they don’t tell you that - you have to go hunting for that information. Breastfeeding education seems to amount to handing you a leaflet with green notes and it only serves to seriously damage women who end up struggling to feed. they need HONEST (such as doing away with this ‘it shouldn’t hurt’ bollocks) and practical advice for mums including what happens when it goes wrong. My MW friend told me they don’t cover ‘when breastfeeding doesn’t go to plan’ incidents with pregnant women because it might put them Off 🙄apparently far better to throw them under the bus and let them struggle

Quite possibly because most people want the best possible for their baby. Didn’t you?

I'm sorry you think me giving you an account of my experience, which you keep telling me is incorrect, is unpleasant. I'm just being honest.

Getting reward points, or being able to spend them in formula is a far cry from people dressing up as nurses giving free sneaky formula

True.

But the reward points are just the thin end of the wedge. Give free reign, formula companies would push and push and cross every boundary they could

Don't you think it should be cheaper across the board?

Why should new parents have to potentially travel to get cheaper formula at a shop offering points rather than just buy it at a fair price at their closest retailer?

Well said!

If you want to argue that you're being penalised because you can't get formula cheaper in a promotion then aren't you being penalised by having to pay for it in the first place?

Because they aren't exactly the same and most of us will give our babies the one that suits them best. We tried a few different ones before her stomach settled down with Aptimil. Trust me, I'd rather have paid less. Couldn't.

It’s a valid and regulated choice.

I've heard about this. Facebook has several groups dedicated to donating breast milk.

It isn't something I'd do either.