Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To change our break away so short notice?

66 replies

riannabb · 08/08/2023 13:25

Me and my boyfriend are off next week.
We have our main holiday booked in 12 weeks time to Gran Canaria which I'm really excited for and can't wait for sunshine but seeing everyone going away now has made me not want to wait.
So I mentioned last week to partner I wouldn't mind going away.
Obviously I'm looking at last min breaks etc and he comes home and tells me he has booked us 3 nights in Ireland.
Cue me being Mega disappointed
I don't want to look ungrateful but I'm disappointed
He has paid for the flights already but hotel is pay on arrival-he has Also booked us to go to the zoo
Would it be so bad if I went ahead and booked a last min holiday abroad instead?
And just took a loss of the £100 flights and £35 zoo that he's already paid for.
Like I say I don't want to seem ungrateful
We were abroad In April too but that was only 5 nights and November thankfully is a week but November is so far away.

OP posts:
Movinghouseatlast · 08/08/2023 15:51

buzzlightyearsgloves · 08/08/2023 15:20

Sorry but you sound awful. YABU

Does adding 'sorry' make you feel that making a nasty comment to someone you don't know is OK?

Do you say 'you sound awful to people in real life, out loud? Or would you not say it because you know it's a really cuntish thing to say?

OldTinHat · 08/08/2023 15:56

What an ungrateful mare you are! You sound extremely shallow. Tell your DP that I'll go with him very excitedly because it sounds like great craic! I'd rather that than Tenerife any day.

mumda · 08/08/2023 15:58

You could just dump him now.

Go on holiday. Be happy. You always take the weather with you.

GolgafrinchamB · 08/08/2023 16:04

Like I say I don't want to seem ungrateful

Too late, you are ungrateful.

He booked a few days away to an interesting destination and you're having a moan because it's a natural wonder of the world (Giant's Causeway) rather than a beach?

Zanatdy · 08/08/2023 16:07

Why not go and try and enjoy it, there’s more to holidays than lying on a sunbed all day

Mummyoflittledragon · 08/08/2023 16:08

Yabu you get to have 2 sunshine holidays this year. Your bf wants to do something else.

ObiKenobi · 08/08/2023 16:15

How very thoughtful if your BF. Why don’t you go Ireland, then book another holiday with your money for a later date.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 08/08/2023 16:18

I think most people would like something different for a 3rd holiday in a year rather than all the same, especially as the other 2 are both in the Canaries.

Maybe he should just sit back and let the OP choose, then you can moan because you have to carry all the mental load and do all the life admin in the relationship

Caroparo52 · 08/08/2023 16:23

I've been to Ireland a couple of times and had a fantastic time. No it's not sunbed holiday, but was beautiful and relaxing and great fun. Go on ... you'll be surprised

mast0650 · 08/08/2023 16:26

I'm a bit more sympathetic. You clearly don't really want to go on a break to Ireland as you are looking for some sun. It was very unreasonable of him to book it without discussing it with you first!

You have to now talk to him about it openly and discuss your options, taking into account both his preferences and yours. Once you talk to him you might realise that a) he really wants to go to Ireland and b) you might actually quite enjoy it too. As others said, maybe he wasn't quite as keen on the sunshine holidays that you chose.

Or maybe you decide that he should do the Ireland holiday with a mate and you should do another break on your own or with a friend. Or maybe you can squeeze in two holidays. Or maybe you both decide together that actually Ireland was a mistake and the best thing to do is write off the cost rather than go through with a holiday that you are pretty sure you won't enjoy. That would be a silly waste of money.

But you can't just decide unilaterally. That's not fair.

pontipinemum · 08/08/2023 16:35

He shouldn't have booked without telling you, but you booking without discussing it with him isn't going to fix it.

But did he think he was doing something nice for both of you? If you just go and book something different you are doing it just to please you.

Ireland is lovely btw.

AndIKnewYouMeantIt · 08/08/2023 16:41

Belfast and Dublin are indeed lovely but I was there this time 7 years ago and it rained for all 4 days, which did somewhat take the shine off. Hopefully the forecast will improve.

StonwEd · 08/08/2023 18:04

Each of my parents are from one of them soo know them both really well and not always the tourist stuff.
Hire a car in Dublin and head out to Glendalough, it’s next level beautiful. The coastal roads between Dublin and the north are stunning, breathtaking.
Stop at carlingford loch between them.
Get the train from Dublin to howth for the day.
Giants causeway is an obvious one well worth doing.

Rtc12 · 08/08/2023 18:09

I'd be annoyed he'd booked it without discussing it with me, it doesn't sound like it was a surprise with you having said last week you wanted to go away, so why did he just go and book it?... I have been to Dublin though and loved it, it was v boozy as it was a hen do, temple bar area had a great atmosphere! I'm sure you'll have a fab time even if it's not what you wanted to book.

JudgeJ · 08/08/2023 18:10

mumda · 08/08/2023 15:58

You could just dump him now.

Go on holiday. Be happy. You always take the weather with you.

Or maybe he should be the one to LTB who sounds incredibly controlling, it's my way or the highway type.

ohsoso · 08/08/2023 18:13

Your poor boyfriend! Trying to do something nice and this is the reaction!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread