Do you have the energy to go out/do things in the evenings?

[Whenwillthebuildingnoisestop]

I don’t.

I’m 45 with a 5 year old dc

Pre child and pre 40, I used to work full time all day, come home and often go to the beach until 10 pm ish or happily walk the dog or workout.
Now I just feel too tired and watch tv on the sofa.
The will is there in wanting to go out, I’m not depressed etc, I just get to the point where I can’t be bothered/just want to stay in.
I often feel too tired to walk the dog after 6, it’s becoming ridiculous as I love to do these things or used to at least.
Is this normal?
Is it age? having a 5 year old? Or something else?
Anyone else like this?
I just want to live my life!

I've not long turned 28 and I felt that way when I worked full time. I had a very social role and had to put on a service constantly and that drained me.
I'm on maternity leave at the moment after having my first and even with a young baby and WAY less night sleep than I had when I was working, I have more energy now than ever.

Working full time and so intensively was sucking the life out of me. Home for half 5, make dinner and eat by half 6 usually, shove a load of washing outside or on the airer, do a couple of bits and bobs to keep on top of the cleaning (because who wants to spend a precious weekend day doing it). Maybe have a bath or if not slob on the sofa for the remaining hour and in bed by 9 to get up at 6 the next day.

It was killing me. Not sure if it's normal but I had no deficiencies and had a reasonable diet. Time to exercise in the week just seemed laughable, I do more now with a 5 month old.

I sometimes go out with my cousin for dinner but other then that, rarely anything. I have autoimmune diseases but even if I didn't, I still think I would prefer a quiet evening in. A lot of things cost money too which I don't have to splash around.

I’m early 40s and am generally tired in the evenings. I force myself to do a light workout or yoga most evenings but like to be in bed by 10 pm.

I also force myself to go out in the evenings every couple of weeks as I don’t want life to pass me by - but I don’t like staying out too late. If someone suggests dinner at 8 pm I’m a bit horrified ! I like to eat dinner at 6 pm ish these days (since lockdown).
im putting it down to age and two young children who take it out of me.

Unless there is an underlying physical reason, I think activity encourages activity. Sometimes it feels hard to get off the sofa and out of the door but once you've made the effort it is all OK.

It is worth bearing in mind that there are so many health benefits from not sitting down for too long, even just standing for five minutes while watching TV is better.

I like to do something with my evenings, walk, swim, meet a friend, etc. I also do a hobby once a week which means going out.

Earlyish 60s though so no small children to tire me out nowadays.

I have a mental illness and a physical disability and I have chronic pain. I am in my late 40s and due to lack of sleep struggle to go anywhere in the evening but we do go out at the weekend in the evening sometimes and I time my pain meds so they are at max effect when I get there. I can't get up and dance anymore but I like watching bands etc. My children are in their 20s and live with partners. A friend had a child very young and one in her late 30s. She said this time around it's much more of a struggle in terms of energy etc.

I leave for work at 6am and get home at 5pm. Bed at 9pm asleep by 10pm. I neither have the time or the energy to go out 😭 I'm 50 something x

I think it's normal to feel tired when your 45, working full time and looking after a 5 year old. Don't be hard on yourself. You could also be menopausal too.

If you can afford it, why don't you treat yourself to a full BUPA medical with all the tests they do. Then take it from there. Could you manage one night out a week? Maybe something really easy like a film club or book club?

I’m 32 with a 4 year old and 2 year old. It takes a lot for me to do anything other than lounge on the sofa once they’re in bed. Parenting is exhausting and I’ve been so close to burn out before that I’d rather not get there again!
Get your levels checked but chances are you’re just a knackered parent!

I go out once a week to put the bins out. That feels like an achievement sometimes. I often feel completely tired out tbh.

I'm a lot younger but yes I go out. Are you taking vitamins? I suggest B vitamins and MSM

I could have written this post although it’s not just tiredness- I don’t want to go out! I have a dc (5) and I’m happy to stay in and watch tv. I’m happy so why force myself out?

I sort of understand. I go to the gym one or two evenings/week as well as during the day at the weekend. I love it when I’ve been and feel really invigorated but if I don’t go I often fall asleep on the sofa!!

I'm 44 with a 5yo and 1yo. I have the energy to do things, but I don't go out as 1yo doesn't sleep well and I like to be there when she wakes. But I'm usually awake until at least midnight, often doing the housework, admin, study and chores. I don't work and have 1yo with me all day, and currently the 5yo during the summer holidays, and we have very active days (lots of walking as no car).
Pre-dc I would be out at evening classes/gym 3-4 nights a week. I'm already planning my evening schedule for when DC2 sleeps more reliably.

I work when DC are in school, stop at 3 and restart at 7-11 when they're in bed. I can do that - mainly laptop work but I have 0 will to go out and do anything. But then I never really did in my 20s or 30s either.

No, never go out after 6 unless I've had the day off

I don't do evenings, I'm an early bird and up at 4am.

45, two DC (a bit older then yours).

My life is literally - take DCs to school, work, take DCs to clubs, put DCs to bed, work some more, go to bed .

I go out maybe twice a year with friends. And only because I feel guilty otherwise. I dread going out (though have fun when I am actually out) and would rather be in bed!

You r not alone! I dream of bed from the moment I wake up! My son asked me today "what's your passion mummy?" I said "sleep" zzZZZ 💤

I get to the end of my day and can barely say my own name never mind ‘go out’. Tonight I wanted to go for a swim, knew it would be good for me but didn’t trust myself to drive there safely I was so tired.
I am in awe of people who go the the theatre and out for meals on a school night. I like you am not depressed, just work bloody hard all day, usually without any break at all and I’m just knackered.
I agree though it’s wasting life.

@InSpainTheRain This really made me laugh!

I am 45 no kids. I work from 8am to around 6pm and am exhausted by the time the evening comes!

I had a nap tonight from 8pm to 9pm. Now reading work emails.

need to get myself some energy!

Same but although I have things I want to do still I packed a lot in when I was younger so am happy to stick to weekends during the day and in the day on holidays or if off work

I would rather be at home watching TV on a night even in a hotel

I find taking dinner out with us is the hey. Stir fry straight into the food flasks, chilli or spag bol is the same one flask of sauce the other with the carb, jacket potatoes cheesed and wrapped in tin foil and salad in a box etc. Straight in the car and to our local beach. Then we eat, often in the car or take camp chairs and then go for a walk or just sit and DD would play in the sand whilst I read a book and had a hot drink.

DD is in her teens now, has an ASD diagnosis and much prefers walking in the dark, she feels less self conscious and seems more carefree so that's what we do, we've just got back from doing just that and I feel loads better for blowing the cobwebs away after WFH all day and staring at a screen.

It’s surely fair enough to want to go to bed early if you are up at 6am or whatnot. I have been both a night owl and a lark in my lifetime. When I was younger I couldn’t get out of bed and was constantly late for work, but would want to stay up all night if I could.

Now I haven’t set an alarm clock in years and am usually out jogging at 7am. But I’m in bed now and it’s just after nine!

it’s just down to your circadian rhythm whether you come alive after 8 or not and doesn’t have much to do with your personality or outlook on life.

Agree. It doesn't really matter how much I exercise or what I eat or how positive I spin it - I am a natural 8am waker with a 6am waker child. 5 years in and I am still struggling.