He's given me an STI... Do I tell his ex...

[sprayme]

A man I was dating had given me an STI. It's been confirmed it's from him, he had it too and was treated .
I've finished with him for other reasons.
There is no doubt that he got this from his previous partner for many reasons but he definitely did get it from her.
He is refusing to tell her in case she turns this around and starts the whole abuse cycle again. Long story.
Do I tell her?
It has the potential to render her infertile and scarred.
Or would that he interfering.
I expect she either doesnt know she is carrying it or else has it treated didn't tell him. She was cheating in the last six months and he found out.
Thoughts?

That last post didn’t make sense. She’s slept with someone who turned out later to by HIV+. Both friends of mine so it was tricky.

I’m in the same boat however he won’t tell me anything however I am awaiting results I think you should reach out and show her your test results n his message to prove your only doing it in a friendly manner if his sleeping with multiple women unprotected then it’s clearly him passing it around and blaming it on the other woman I have multiple partners but i always get tested after each

You never truly know what people get up to.

I had to fight the urge to tell some bloke who would turn up sporadically over the past 4 years between me and his ex when they would split from each. HPV diagnosis involved but his ex would have been of the age to very likely get the hpv vaccine but thinking about it now he could have sleeping with all and sundry. Not to mention a men cannot test for HPV. There could have been other women, really makes you think.

^ if not anonymous message?

Just to clarify, sexual health clinics can usually do partner notification where they will contact any previous sexual partners saying they might have been exposed to an STI and inviting them/giving directions for testing with no names mentioned. They don't tend to go beyond the partners of the person affected by the STI.
https://www.bashhguidelines.org/media/1035/pn_pil_digital_2016.pdf

@IwillwearwhatIwant thanks for clarifying, I was a bit 😯reading your first post as if you/he knew his status at the time he'd likely be on medication and unable to pass it on to your other friend. Hopefully she tested for HIV afterwards anyway if condon's weren't used, or when he was diagnosed the clinic discussed notifying her