someone reassure me about this nursery decision?

[unisepps]

If I don’t return to work when DD is one, I will basically lose my job. I have enough money to last another 10 months so I could technically do it but trying to find a decent job again would be hard work (I don’t earn huge amounts but over 50k so I don’t want to snub the job).

However, found out this week that DD will be the youngest in the baby room. I feel sick. She will start at 11 months so she has four weeks to settle before I go back. I feel like such a monster. The next age up is 13 months. I know it’s not a lot but in terms of her life so far it’s a huge jump isn’t it. I am so torn up about it and really don’t know if I am doing the right thing anymore. Anyone any thoughts?

It’s the norm in much of Europe to start earlier than 12 months.

Dd started at 8.5m and it was a bit hard with tears and nap-refusal but 100% the right thing overall.

Can you start part time?

I went back to work 3 days pw but dd actually started at nursery only 2 days pw and my dh took the third day off for a while to make it work.

I think 5 days at nursery can be slightly harder because you're led by their routine instead of the other way around. But still workable.

Do not sacrifice your career just to avoid a month or two of your baby being a little unsettled.

At that age I would get a childminder.

I think the age is fine, the last one in will usually be the youngest. Mine was 15 months but they put him in the next room up so still the youngest for a while!I would advise try and do the settling in gradually, as it sounds like you've allowed plenty of time. I would try to do at least 2 or 3 short sessions (45 -60 mins) where you stay for the whole time before you leave her, to allow chance for her to get used to the environment. Don't interact with her too much but just sit quietly and let her explore and meet the staff and come back to you if she wants. On the 3rd or 4th session, leave her for half an hour after staying for half an hour. She'll probably be ok after that although expect a few tears on drop off for a few days. It's always heart wrenching when your first child starts nursery but they are almost always fine after a few sessions.

I would try and send her 2 or max 3 days a week if you can, it's worth taking a pay cut to spend time with your young baby.

It will be fine. Mine went at 10 months and loved it. After a month or so she would jump out of my arms when she saw her fave worker.

My DC1 went from 6 months as that’s when paid mat allowance ended, DC2 at 9 months. I’m clearly evil 🙄

Lots will start younger op. My DS was 7 months when he went to the childminder. Try not to worry - if the nursery is a good one then your little one will be fine.

DD2 started a month ago bang on 12 months and she's had no issues settling in. DD1 also goes to the same nursery and likes to tell me all the things DD2 got up to, as it's a small nursery and open-plan so she sees her all through the day. When I went to collect them both the other day, DD2 was throwing a balloon between her and the other babies and absolutely cackling with joy about it, I just stood at the door and watched her for a while as it was so lovely!

Also DD1 was 18 months when she started and she was harder to settle in. We had a few weeks of crying on drop-off (although she was fine a few mins later and no tears the rest of the day) and being a bit clingy when we arrived. DD2 has never cried on drop-off, I just put her down and she toddles off to join in whatever is going on! She is always very excited to see me or DH when we pick her up and comes running over, so she does like us

Both of mine started at ten months