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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you allow your 12 year old to have acrylic nails?

206 replies

Icantremembermyusername · 31/07/2023 22:22

Just that, really?
Am I being mean?
DD - Can I have my nails done?
Me -yes, we’ll have a manicure during the holidays.
DD - No, I meant can I go to X place and have acrylic nails FOR MY BIRTHDAY
Me - No. I’ve already organised your (very expensive) birthday present (and those from both sets of grandparents and your extended relatives) and agreed to pay for a movie night with your mates plus a pre agreed day out with your best mate. We can maybe have a manicure at a salon (no acrylics) later in the hols.
DD - massive sulk and went to bed.
i feel like she’s taking the absolute piss!
Aibu? Yes - she should have the nails. No - she’s being a brat.
Thank you!

OP posts:
Tryingmuchharder · 02/08/2023 07:59

clairea123 · 01/08/2023 23:56

Im going to let my 15 ( nearly 16) yo dd have her nails done for the holiday,
She has asked, I said no unless she paid for it herself, but she's helped me out loads with ds this holiday whilst I've worked so going to book it as a surprise.

Im surprised how many people have mentioned the look of it- tacky etc. surely as women we should be telling our young girls that they can look however they like? And we shouldn't be judging others on how they look? the comments re damage to nail are different but the ones about how they look. It would be boring if we all liked to look the same.

I've been having my nails done for over 25 years and am CEO of a charity- I'm yet to find a task I can't do with my nails on and it doesn't impede on any of my day to day life.
My dd will continue to compete in sport 8 times a week with her acrylic nails.

some of the stereotypes on this thread are very depressing and a real blast from the past. I thought we were better than this in 2023.

Maybe some of the reasons are due to the type of glue that they stick acrylics on at some nail bars? It can and has caused damage to the nail bed. Some less than reputable salons, the rock up and sit and wait type, use glues that are banned, file the nail bed before attaching the plastic nail etc.

Willmafrockfit · 02/08/2023 08:25

dd had some sort of special nails for her prom, so the age of 16.
she has your plenty of time in future for this

Frazzledatfifty · 02/08/2023 08:47

Absolutely not! Inappropriate for a 12 year old…. The odd normal manicure with fun colour polish in the hols - fine… My daughter had her first set of acrylics when she had a holiday job and could pay herself… As for the sulking…. wouldn’t have that either - needs to cheer up fast or the offer of a normal manicure later in the hols taken off the table too…

Sennelier1 · 02/08/2023 08:49

Nailpolish o.k., anything glued on, no.

Toddlerteaplease · 02/08/2023 08:50

No because false nails look awful.

Pottedpalm · 02/08/2023 08:51

I don’t like my daughter having gel nails, and she is in her 30’s 😬

OhBanana · 02/08/2023 08:52

Normal manicure fine, probably wouldn’t allow my child acrylics or shellac until they’re 14/15. But even then very occasionally as it damaged your nails.

NewDogOwner · 02/08/2023 08:59

Gel nails or BIAB nails as a treat but not acrylics. They damage their nails, make writing and typing more difficult, make PE more dangerous, are so easy to damage, and look terrible when some are inevitably damaged or fall off.

SaturdayGiraffe · 02/08/2023 09:01

For the kids getting gel nails, are they wearing sunscreen for the UV light?

k1233 · 02/08/2023 09:07

Gel and acrylic both have the potential to cause life long allergies that mean, amongst other things, you may not be able to get fillings because they use the same compound. On that basis alone it would be a big no from me.

I would tell her that if she wants long nails she can grow and paint her own. That's what I do. It's really fun with all the nail art around these days. I redo mine weekly, which lets me do so many styles. I see people at work with gel nails and they're the same thing for ages. Much more fun changing colours weekly and dressing to match your nails 😊

flutterby1 · 02/08/2023 09:07

No

MojoJojo71 · 02/08/2023 09:18

I let my 10yo get some glue on nails from primark first week of the school holidays in the hopeshe would see what a massive pain they are for an active child like her and it worked a treat. She couldn’t tie her laces, wipe her bum or wash her hands properly so she took them off after a couple of days 😁

stimpy1 · 02/08/2023 09:27

How about nail wraps, they sell them on etsy, lots of different designs and they peel off like stickers yet wipe off with nail varnish remover. My daughter loves them, they are cheap and you can change regularly but they will last 1-2 weeks

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 02/08/2023 09:34

I might, short ones! - but only if the 12 yr old was a habitual nail-biter - to let their own grow up underneath, in the hope of breaking the habit. I’ve known that work in an adult.

Otherwise no way.

NotLovingWFH · 02/08/2023 09:40

I said DD could try glue on ones first (the glue dissolves if you soak them) as she has wanted long nails for ages. They lasted about a day before she removed them because they stopped her doing anything and she’s not mentioned them since.

I also said she could have gel nail polish done for her birthday but that too lasted just a few days before she picked it off.

Don’t see why either of these are a biggie for an occasional treat. Ordinary nail varnish any other time if she wants to.

Only think I’d probably draw the line at for this age would be the eyelashes. I think they look daft on the majority of people who have them and they’re definitely not good for your own lashes. Plenty of time for that when she’s a few years older.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 02/08/2023 09:56

I have had natural long nails most of my adult life and long nails do impact the way you do things. One of my cut off points (excuse the pun) is when my nails start hitting the the next row of keys when I’m typing. If you are not used to long nails it is really easy to catch or bash them. I really wouldn’t recommend them for a child. A manicure or easily removed glue on nails to see what it is like is one thing but acrylics is too much.

I also have a walk in centre tale - when I was there there was a teenage girl where an infection had got under the acrylic into the nail bed (the mum thought it a bad technician who had damaged the cuticles then put the acrylic on anyway).

clairea123 · 02/08/2023 10:18

Tryingmuchharder · 02/08/2023 07:59

Maybe some of the reasons are due to the type of glue that they stick acrylics on at some nail bars? It can and has caused damage to the nail bed. Some less than reputable salons, the rock up and sit and wait type, use glues that are banned, file the nail bed before attaching the plastic nail etc.

Show quote history

but many of the comments are no they look awful/ no they look tacky/ and making judgements about what people with nails on are able to do or not do.
I can understand some people worrying about the nail/ nail bed etc. but this is something different.

Mumof2teens79 · 02/08/2023 10:22

I let my 15yr old have nail extensions for for time for holiday this year.
12 I think is too young.

Apart from looking tacky (certain nail extensions in particular are a certain "look") on young kids they do damage their nails. So I have always encouraged mine to try and grow their nails naturally instead.

k1233 · 02/08/2023 10:36

Ha ha @ChazsBrilliantAttitude One of my cut off points (excuse the pun) is when my nails start hitting the the next row of keys when I’m typing.

That's mine too LOL If mine get too long they actually get uncomfortable. I think it's due to the rule of thirds - you should be able to mark your nail into thirds and the length past the tip of the finger should be a third. Any longer and you risk tearing off painfully. I watch a lot of nail videos that explain it eg the one below

https://www.tiktok.com/@nailcareer.education/video/7178993243831405830

Cordeliathecat · 02/08/2023 10:49

I don’t see the issue with it personally. Have let my daughter get her nails done as a treat before. But only at my place where I know they’ll do a good job. But it’s all about balance. My daughter is very much into nails, hair, skincare and make-up but also incredibly sporty and hard-working in school. In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter if she starts getting her nail done occasionally at 12 or at 14? She’ll get them done eventually anyway

luckylavender · 02/08/2023 10:53

No. But then I don't agree with acrylic nails at all. They're very bad for you. And I wear nail polish all the time.

toomuchlaundry · 02/08/2023 11:31

@Cordeliathecat why will she get them done eventually? Do all females have to get their nails done?

dancingdaisies · 02/08/2023 11:34

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the request of the poster.

toomuchlaundry · 02/08/2023 11:36

@dancingdaisies are you happy for her to ruin her nails?

dancingdaisies · 02/08/2023 11:38

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the request of the poster.