Stop being shitty

[weneedhelpandlove]

Has anyone else noticed how horrible people can be on Mumsnet. It's so frustrating to see. Literally every single post I have seen where a mum is asking for some advice or support, someone out there has to be a complete arsehole to them. What is happening to the world? Why does it feel nice to some people to belittle and be just damn right rude to anyone. This site is for mums to support mums. Majority of us come here in a vulnerable state asking for help. When did being kind and understanding become a rare quality!

Sorry just a rant.

Have a lovely day

I think sometimes, people in real life can be reluctant to say anything even vaguely unpleasant.

Someone being told, 'it sounds like you are letting your friend walk all over you and you need to grow a backbone', might be the wake-up call a person needs.

It's not necessarily pleasant to hear, but is necessary.

I think a lot of the cunty posters are men.

Oh no, I think this is too simple.

AIBU (for example) has pretty much always been a bit of a cunty place, and the majority of MNetters are still female.

I always assume it's people who would love to say what they really think in real life, but can't, so use MN as a way to do that.

TBH, when I posted about a relationship issue a few years ago, the brutally honest comments were the most helpful. They were things my friends in real life would probably never have said.

I'm normally empathetic but as the person who trained me as a counsellor said, leaving someone thinking it's OK to not be OK does not help them.

Some MNrs are def too harsh imo, but this is social media so you will find narcissistic, misogynistic and sociopathic behaviour amongst us.

I think many posters trot out a 'Mumsnet learnt response', that's both unhelpful and unrealistic.

So their replies are all about how absolutely everything in the home should be 50/50 etc, and the DH's behaviour should be virtually impeccable, if it isn't then the OP should leave and so on.

So it's like reading from a textbook where you can't really argue with the logic, but the fact they're ignoring the actual reality really doesn't help the OP.

Plus, there's every chance they've made their relationship to look 'textbook' online but it really isn't that real.

I wonder sometimes if they should re-name the site. Mumsnet sounds...well, mumsy....and as others have pointed out it's not just for or about mums. What could it be called?

Non Gender Specific Net? 😂😂

Agree wholeheartedly!

Yes I think there can be real value in that. How often in real life do people agree and offer platitudes while thinking the person is in the wrong/taking advantage of someone else/needs to stand up to themselves.

There can be value in posters being told that here, and MN has a reputation for blunt advice. Don't ask for advice here and then expect hugs and kisses, it's not the way it works and it's what makes the place great IMO. I've been here over a decade and yes it's changed, there's less humour and more trolling, but MN has always had blunt advice at its core.

And never ever ever believe anyone's story on her internet, especially to the extent it gets under your skin. And never ever ever post anything on here that you think is anonymous, you're more easily identified than you think.