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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not make use of our last opportunities for a cheap family holiday abroad?

72 replies

OrangeySnicket · 26/07/2023 08:06

I have three DC: three year old twins and a baby nearly a year old. The twins will be starting school in September 24.

We've never been on a holiday abroad since having children, and if we want to do it we really need to before September 24 when we'll be restricted to school holidays and so paying a lot more.

At the moment, we've just done breaks in the UK with Butlins etc which my kids adore because of all the shows and entertainment, and the pools. We can also drive to nice places on the coast within about 90 mins so the traveling is stress free.

Going abroad would bring us more reliable weather for the beach, outdoor splash parks etc but we'd have to pick carefully so it wasn't somewhere too hot especially for the baby.

I want a holiday to be a holiday, and as easy as possible, so if we went abroad it would be to an all inclusive resort which we'd be unlikely to leave more than once in the week for a day trip somewhere.

We could do 4 or 5 midweek Butlins trips next year (with food included) for the price of one week to an AI from our local airport (Spain/Greece/Turkey/Canaries).

DH is really keen to go abroad over the next year but I think we'd be much better off having multiple trips to Butlins etc. I don't think DCs will care about being abroad and would prefer more trips. With school holiday prices and then having to pay for a seat on a plane for all three kids/needing accommodation for three kids a holiday abroad will be out of budget after next year.

AIBU to make us miss out on our chance to go abroad next year in favour of UK trips?

OP posts:
Loobydoobies · 26/07/2023 08:14

In a similar position, but with only one. We are opting for a mix of things, but I think the key is to work out what is important to you, and what will make the best memories.

YouPistonWhat · 26/07/2023 08:15

Do you want a holiday in the warm watching the dc splash in a pool, play on the sand etc? They would be happy in butlins or abroad at those ages.

Ricochetsandwhich · 26/07/2023 08:15

I would let DH have this one. His voice is just as important as yours and if you’re not going to have the chance to do a holiday of his choice for the foreseeable future I’d take the opportunity now. You may be right in that the kids will have just as good a time at home but it’s not just about the kids.

Finnegans · 26/07/2023 08:17

Ricochetsandwhich · 26/07/2023 08:15

I would let DH have this one. His voice is just as important as yours and if you’re not going to have the chance to do a holiday of his choice for the foreseeable future I’d take the opportunity now. You may be right in that the kids will have just as good a time at home but it’s not just about the kids.

This.

Original poster
OrangeySnicket · 26/07/2023 08:18

YouPistonWhat · 26/07/2023 08:15

Do you want a holiday in the warm watching the dc splash in a pool, play on the sand etc? They would be happy in butlins or abroad at those ages.

That's the thing I can't work out. Absolutely loved being abroad before kids, but more reading a book on the beach drinking a cocktail! Can't work out if it will be lovely watching them play or just a massive stress over everyone getting burnt/too hot etc!

OP posts:
CalistoNoSolo · 26/07/2023 08:20

You've done multiple butlins holidays already and you want to stop your husband having a holiday abroad so you can do multiple more butlins holidays? You are being very very unreasonable.

PragmaticWench · 26/07/2023 08:20

For the next year you won't need a separate seat on the plane for your youngest. Bit less cost.

billyt · 26/07/2023 08:22

And if you go after schools go back, but before your little ones start, the cost will be better than during the school holidays.

I'd go for the holiday abroad, you can do Butlins anytime.

bibbityboppityboo · 26/07/2023 08:23

It sounds like you've already done the UK breaks several times, I'm sort of with your DH on this one - it'd be nice to have one holiday abroad when you know your future will be similar to what you've already done for the past few years.

NameChange30 · 26/07/2023 08:24

You could travel by ferry to Holland or northern France, and stay in a holiday park type place, which has swimming pools (indoor/outdoor), play areas, restaurant and shops on site. Some of them have a kids club that your twins could go to. Ferry is generally cheaper than flying and less stressful because you can fill the car with all the stuff you need for 3 little ones. It'll be similar-ish to butlins except more interesting because you'll be abroad with different food to try and places to visit. Why not give that a go?

continentallentil · 26/07/2023 08:24

Ricochetsandwhich · 26/07/2023 08:15

I would let DH have this one. His voice is just as important as yours and if you’re not going to have the chance to do a holiday of his choice for the foreseeable future I’d take the opportunity now. You may be right in that the kids will have just as good a time at home but it’s not just about the kids.

This.

Plus I can remember loving warm sea and sand age 4 - they’ll love it.

petitdonkey · 26/07/2023 08:26

I regret not taking advantage of going abroad more before mine started school. You also could go in may or October before it gets super hot if you’re worried about them burning. All inclusive sounds like bliss with children (I’ve never done it)

Arewehumanorarewecupboards · 26/07/2023 08:28

I’m with your Dh. You’ve done kid’s holidays, now is a perfect time to go abroad before school etc.

NameChange30 · 26/07/2023 08:28

Duinrell in Holland is on my wish list but we're restricted to the summer holidays so it's expensive, especially for the accommodation I want (it's cheaper if you camp!)
https://www.duinrell.com/holiday-park/duingalows

If you're up for northern France check out Yelloh village, the one we go to is fantastic. Most of the accommodation is static caravans.

Duingalows - Bungalows at Holiday Park Duinrell

Our comfortable cottages (Duingalows) are the ideal family-friendly accommodation. A stay includes free entrance to the Amusement Park and Water Park!

https://www.duinrell.com/holiday-park/duingalows

continentallentil · 26/07/2023 08:28

NameChange30 · 26/07/2023 08:24

You could travel by ferry to Holland or northern France, and stay in a holiday park type place, which has swimming pools (indoor/outdoor), play areas, restaurant and shops on site. Some of them have a kids club that your twins could go to. Ferry is generally cheaper than flying and less stressful because you can fill the car with all the stuff you need for 3 little ones. It'll be similar-ish to butlins except more interesting because you'll be abroad with different food to try and places to visit. Why not give that a go?

I wouldn’t do that - the weather is no better than the Uk.

It’s a short flight to S Europe. The 4 year olds will just be excited by a flight and if the toddler whinges so what - people are used to it.

LosingTheBelly · 26/07/2023 08:30

Ricochetsandwhich · 26/07/2023 08:15

I would let DH have this one. His voice is just as important as yours and if you’re not going to have the chance to do a holiday of his choice for the foreseeable future I’d take the opportunity now. You may be right in that the kids will have just as good a time at home but it’s not just about the kids.

Exactly what I was going to say.

RoseBucket · 26/07/2023 08:31

I didn’t take my daughter abroad until she was 8. But that’s because I can’t lay on a beach or by a pool all day and like to explore. Since then she has been on several trips overseas.

Before then UK holidays were perfect, we did Butlins and Centre Parcs a few times and outside the school holidays they were so much cheaper! I don’t think kids care so it’ll be more of a decision for you both but I can understand your point of view.

BrawnWild · 26/07/2023 08:34

How much parenting is DH likely to do 9n the abroad scenario? Is he going to put his feet up while you run ragged chasing 3 kids and worrying about water safety?

Or will you benefit for a good chunk of rest and relaxation?

If rest and relaxation isnt the main point of the holiday (and with kids, it rarely is) youd be better off at butlins where dad micks in, kids have fun and you have more cash in your pockets and less travel. Basically you are in the throes of kids holidays for a while and an all inclusive holiday now isnt what is would be be pre-kids.

My advice is to book yourself into Bluestone and treat yourself to a a few hours in the spa and then give DH some downtime to chill in the lodge. Take turns to rest and just accept holidays arent a break for a few years xx

Clymene · 26/07/2023 08:38

I'd take the opportunity to have a lovely holiday in the sun while you can afford it. Holiday like the locals - have a siesta after lunch and a late dinner

Lockdownmummy · 26/07/2023 08:44

Similar situation - DC1 starts school Sept 24 and DC2 Sept 25. Only done UK breaks so far.

We've booked a week AI for Sept. Short flight (Menorca), family oriented resort. Hoping to get them into kids club for a morning (or 2!) for some relaxation 🤞🏻

But how this holiday goes will determine what we book for next year.....

gallop17 · 26/07/2023 08:47

I'm with your DH, would you even want to do Butlins 4 or 5 times in 1 year? If you work it out like that there are loads of things you could do for that money, for me a holiday abroad is worth the money.

WimbyAce · 26/07/2023 08:50

Remember you can take the kids out of school before they turn 5 without being fined. And then after that it would still work out cheaper even if you do get fined so I wouldn't let the school thing be a deciding factor.

NameChange30 · 26/07/2023 08:50

continentallentil · 26/07/2023 08:28

I wouldn’t do that - the weather is no better than the Uk.

It’s a short flight to S Europe. The 4 year olds will just be excited by a flight and if the toddler whinges so what - people are used to it.

Show quote history

Well if you want guaranteed sun and heat, then you wouldn't go to Holland or northern france, no. However, with young kids (or indeed for myself) I don't actually like it when it's too hot, I prefer warm enough for beach/pool but not boiling. I suggested it because it seems like a good compromise to me.

I do fantasise about all inclusive somewhere hot but in reality it would be really hard work with my two, I think. My oldest isn't the type to happily go off to kids club and my youngest is still too little. And with two 4yos and a baby/toddler, neither parent would be able to chill, not unless the 4yos went to kids club.

Springbaby2023 · 26/07/2023 09:01

We’re in the same position (three yo and baby) and I’m torn. I think I’m leaning towards several little uk trips as DC will enjoy them just as much and they’re still cheaper in term time. I think I agree with you that it’s better to spread the cost on a couple of nice breaks than just one big one. We did go abroad last year and while it was nice, it’s quite stressful with a young child (and that was when we just had one!)

Planetegg · 26/07/2023 09:03

Jet2 were offering free kids places for under 4s not too long ago. Not sure if it is restricted to 1 place per holiday, but I would definitely have a look at prices for Southern Spain/Balearics in mid Sept. Quieter and less hot than summer holiday times. Definitely go all inclusive and check reviews!

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