Is it really that hard.....? 🤔

[StillGotBabyBrain]

My family is vegan, not a massive deal.

When the school has events, no vegan option, so everyone gets a bbq or food catered and we don't. Not even a dairy free alternative for hot drinks! (Primary school, high school is better).

When they go for sleepovers I get worried parents asking me what should they do, can I provide food and drinks for them...

Pubs and restaurants barely cater for adults let alone add options for the kids menu.

Went to a choir meeting the other week, nothing I could eat from the food included in my ticket price.

Am I being unreasonable thinking it's really not that difficult to provide bread and houmous or vegetable dishes? They're suitable for everyone, so isn't a waste of food! Blows my mind.

I agree with you but when attending this kind of event, sometimes I'd just roll with it. I don't think eating a processed vegan item once in a while is going to be harmful. I think it would be pushing too hard if you not only asked for vegan food but then also demanded the type of vegan food that was acceptable. (Thinking of fingerfood type catering here).

What an unbelievably unpleasant and revolting pair you are. Whilst not entirely vegan myself, we quite often have vegan meals based around South Asian or Middle Eastern cuisine which are very easy and very tasty. Ignorant dicks like you should maybe go spend a day in an abatoir/factory farm and see how you feel about animal cruelty then. That's if you're capable of rational thought and empathy let alone environmental considerations

Your opening post where you said bread was suitable for everyone (and then went on about pastry) shows that coeliacs didn't cross your mind until later in the thread.

Black coffee covers hot drinks. Not liking it doesn't mean it wasn't available.

Because it's been trendy, there are significantly more vegan options available than there are gluten free. Most people do keep meat separate from veg in buffets, but you're still going to find broken breadsticks poking out of the hummus pots and bits of cracker scattered over everything.

It didn't occur to you to consider wheat/gluten, so why would any omnivore think of vegan food?

All of the vegetarians I know choose to eat that way for ethical reasons - their cheese sandwich being on the same plate as my ham sandwich makes zero difference to animal welfare Vs separate plates.

Very different to my peanut allergic daughter who could end up in the back of an ambulance if her sandwich was next to one with peanut butter. Choice not requirement.

Good for you @Blackbyrd. It wouldn't do for us all to believe/like the same thing, would it. People believe all kinds of things in life. Your priorities are not the same as mine. And that's ok.

I've been vegetarian for decades. Over the years, the choices have got much better and far more interesting when eating out. Until the last couple of years, that is, as more and more places now offer vegan options but no vegetarian options.

Twice recently I've been out for brunch and found full English and full vegan English (with horrible vegan sausages and scrambled tofu) on the menu but no vegetarian option with healthy eggs and butter. It's infuriating! Many of the vegan choices are over-processed, tasteless and unhealthy and feature horrible fake-meat. I hope this is just a phase.

There’s not really an excuse any more - even aldi has loads of vegan options!

Just bring your own. I think if your dietary requirements are different from 'the norm' it's something you just have to do. I've been a vegetarian for 40 years and I remember the days when often the only veggie option was an omelette.
Funnily enough. my main gripe these days is a lot of restaurants/hotels/cafes have scrapped vegetarian food in favour of vegan, so I have no idea where you are eating out if there is no vegan option.
To be honest, your OP has a whiff of attention-seeking to it. Why should people giving up their own time put themselves out even more for one family among the dozens they are catering for? Just bring your own.
And that post for the person whingeing that her sandwiches were on the same plate as meat does vegetarians no favours and only illustrates why people are reluctant to make the effort.

I don’t need an excuse to not cater to vegans - I just don’t want to. 🤷‍♀️

@WhatHoJeeves our posts crossed!

And there it is.
If you won't cater to others why should they cater for you?
Vegans never see the irony in their statements.

@Katypp The vegetarian solidarity club!

Happy to cater for vegetarian, as we can all eat that too, but vegan is just not what we want to eat or think about preparing.

I went to quite a big do recently where all the catering was vegan. The food was excellent and the carnivores were perfectly happy, and generally it made life much easier for the caterers. I suspect more venues will need to go down that path as time goes on.

I found as a caterer when I provided a vegan or vegetarian platter the meat eaters often hoovered it up as a nice side dish to their meat dish or used the same serving spoons for both. Mostly unthinkingly but still frustrating for those who cannot eat meat for whatever reason. Your side dish was sometimes someone else's only choice of meal!

Yes it's not hard and yes these places are unreasonable. You don't have an allergy or anything. Providing vegetables is simple!

As a vegetarian some 40 years ago, it was a nightmare then. I went to an ICE meeting and the people in the queue for food ahead of me all wanted to try the veggie food so there was none left for me, I took salad leafs. I ate egg and chips twice a day for 2 weeks on holiday. The pea soup they tried to serve me in Scotland had ham in it. Pizza Hut cheese had animal rennet in it without declaring this. I could go on....

Op, you are being offered food, you’re just choosing not to eat it.

just take your own food with you.

my teen has allergies and is on a gluten free diet so has to take their own food everywhere as they cant pick and choose what to eat and rarely do people provide a gluten free option (or think they are but don’t realise gluten is in the sauce or the crisps/sweets they put out).

we don’t make a fuss, just discreetly eat the food we bring with us.

Im allergic to so many veggie & vegan staples that I can’t rely on either when eating out. Should I expect the pta to cater to my long list of food allergies? some of which can be fatal btw!

Exactly. Most households could whizz up a vegetarian meal from stuff in their cupboard or fridge.
Vegan food is not the norm in most homes unless you are a vegan. We have lentils, nuts, marmite etc but there is not much you could easily put together except things like Marmite sandwiches (and then we would probably be accused of being boring)
I think the unknown about things like honey, wine etc also puts people off coupled with fussing about how things are cooked.
You do you and bring your own. You can still be the centre of attention when you unpack it 😁

OP. You’d be alright at mine I think as long as you like Indian and Persian food. The only vegan dishes I really pull off well are various curried veg ,rice and dhal and veggie kebabs. I’m not vegan but I do cater for my sons halal and kosher mates and I adore curried veg. You’d be in a carb coma I expect but definitely well fed.

Oh bore off with your sanctimonious bullshit. Thankfully most people don’t give a shit.

OP this is not an allergy it is a preference. I'd get it if it was a peanut allergy etc but seriously?
Veganism is a lifestyle choice and I do question your children's ability to make that decision for themselves given the social awkwardness and exclusion that you have already mentioned comes with it.

I do hope you are telling the kids and parents you feed these alternatives too, I'd be very very pissed off if you gave my child fake vegan meat or soya. As a coeliac he is restricted already without eating more stuff that makes a lot of people react and is not what it says it is. You are very confused if you think kids can't tell the difference, they are trying to be polite to their friends crazy mum!

It’s not the case everywhere. We sell a vegetarian ticket for the School BBQ but would make it vegan if asked. It does however mean that one of the volunteers has to buy and skewer veg kebabs and go out her way to get the fresh ingredients. We provide a lolly as a dairy free alternative to ice cream(but again it’s me ordering it and storing) which doesn’t sound like much but it is one extra thing to remember when we do most of the organising between 2/3 of us. I think if you’re a regular helper at PTA/ church events then YANBU however, if you don't give your time but expect others to make these amendments then YABU.

I only read OP posts. I really want to think you're reasonable here, but throughout your posts you aren't taking account of the extra burden on others. You have to stop being annoyed about being asked to meet someone halfway.

1. The PTA - This is just other parents giving up their free time to raise money for school. If you want something different, you've really got to step up with a suggestion and some help. Dropping in the vegan BBQ plus utensils and discussing with whoever buys food which burgers are ok. Or costing out vegan wraps, tacos or chilli bowl as an alternative stall.
2. It's really not on to complain about parents asking you for input for friend visits. I always ask what kids eat, because over half of them are fussy, and most kids get even fussier away from home. One won't have food touching other food, another only likes a certain type of bread, another one only eats nuggets and chips etc etc. Why is it hard to specify a few simple examples like "houmous and pitta with salad", "anything Linda McCartney range with chips or plain bread and veg", "pizza with veg and vegan cheese", "veggie wrap with avocado instead of whatever meat you'd usually use"?