Missing my child’s birthday for new job

[PrettyPleaseXo]

I feel absolutely dreadful.
I’m a single mum and start a new job next month after waiting months and months so it can’t be put off. The day after I start is my daughters 5th birthday and I’m working 9-5 meaning I leave the house at 7am and don’t get back till 6pm.
how would you work this in terms of celebrating? presents? Cake? Etc. my mum is looking after her for me and my eldest as it’s school holidays obviously.
the plan was to take her to butlins with her brother for the day so I’m going to do that at the weekend instead I just feel awful that her actual birthday is going to be shit basically
please be nice I feel awful

I personally think it’s really strange people suggesting you move the birthday altogether I mean your birthday is when it is … I don’t think it’s a big deal just do a surprise of balloons etc when home from work maybe a nice takeaway presents and then celebrate properly at the weekend! Most of all don’t feel guilty u gotta do what u gotta do :-)

Yeah, this is what I would do. Maybe her favorite takeout and cupcakes on the day, and then a party on the following weekend, if you want to have a party.

You are probably the only person making a big deal out of this completely ordinary occurrence .
She'll not care unless you freak out about it (sounds like you are). Just chill out.
Most people miss stuff . It's nothing

Celebrate weekend before

At 5 she will understand if you tell her what’s going on and why you can’t be off that day to be with her. Make her day special with a prearranged special breakfast, buy a bunch of balloons so when she wakes she can see them, sing HBD in morning before work and come back with a cake and candles and fun dinner that evening! You can even order them lunch at your mums if there’s something she particularly likes or ask your mum to take her out.

My mum missed Christmases with us as she worked in a hospital. Our relationship has always been perfectly good.
You're missing it to go and work and keep a roof over her head, not to go drinking with mates. Dont sweat it. You can celebrate another day.

Come through the door after work on her birthday with mcdonnalds, cake and gifts and all will be well. Get your mum to do something nice with her during the day. Soft play, play farm, swimming etc to make it fun. The you can go to butlins at the weekend as her test from you.

it’s rotten having to work on special occasions but it will be fine.

Her birthday won’t be shit, she will have a fun day with grandma then presents and cake when you get home and she will be excited for the weekend. Don’t beat yourself up it’s not the end of the world she will have a great day regardless x

I think like all the others that you shouldn't beat yourself up as you are trying your hardest & these things are always going to happen . Life gets in the way of plans all the time she will be happy with all that she gets & will be excited to open her presents at any time. Please try to not feel guilty you are starting a new job & all that you do is to make sure your life with your children is better for trying your hardest & to me that sounds like you are doing just that . It's all worth it in the end xxx

I would make her a special birthday packed lunch, get her a badge for school. Maybe plait her hair the night before or curl it or if curly then pick some pretty clips to make her feel special. Maybe blow up some balloons, let her pick take out and ready her a birthday story at night and then do something with her at the weekend. Do not feel bad. I am sure you are not just workload for your own spending money and that your hard work will help her throughout the year not just for one day. Tell her how you feel. Kids understand more than you think.Maybecall it an extended birthday could do a film on tv with popcorn the night before.l.x

My daughters birthday has mostly always fallen on a school day since she started school so I've always been at work and her at school. We do cards and gifts first thing then a special tea on evening and then parties or special birthday plans always happen on the following weekend! I think this is pretty normal. I wouldn't worry at all xx

Why will her birthday be shit? Do you not think your Mom will do anything nice with her?
Do Butlins at the weekend, do breakfast and some presents in the morning, give your mom money to do something nice, nice dinner when you get home and more presents

I nearly always worked on my children's birthday, so we had a special dinner of their choice , had presents and a small cake at night. Proper celebrations at weekend.
They didn't care, as their birthday wasn't just one day.

Put up balloons and banners
Come home from work with a Mcdonalds and cake and celebrate at the weekend this is the normal for a lot of families

Just celebrate at a later date. Nothing to feel awful or guilty over. Your security and that of your family comes first. Work comes before birthdays. Only lazy fat people care more about eating cake than real priorities. Is it that you actually feel guilty or is it that you really can't be bothered to go to work/interview and prefer to stay at home with your child? Unless you have a rich husband then you have little other option than to miss out. Just do it.

In the nicest possible way you need to get a grip. It's what parents who work have been having to do all their children's lives. Plus she'll be at school until 3pm anyway right? We normally do presents etc in the morning, then cake in the Evening. I leave for work at 7.30am and not back until 6pm too. Your daughter won't care what time you get there, just that you're there.

Sorry just seen its in holidays. Your daughter won't mind what time you do cake Trust me. Just explain to her 😊

I think I worked on more of my DC's birthdays than I didn't to be honest. I wouldn't worry about it. Remember that most children have their birthdays in term time and as a result it's pretty normal for parties and celebrations to take place at the nearest weekend rather than on the day itself. I would give her cards/presents on the actual day and explain that the celebration will be at the weekend. In my experience this is what many, probably most families do if a birthday falls on a work/school day, and it's what your DD will get used to seeing at school as most parties she will be invited to will be at weekends. Don't be too hard on yourself and enjoy the weekend celebrations.

Have never made a big deal of birthdays. I'll be working on my youngest's first birthday. We're having a little "party" (cake and present opening with immediate family) at my parents' the weekend before. Have done similar things for my older daughter before.

Don't feel bad. Unfortunately we can't always get birthdays off, just as most children without summer holiday birthdays will usually have to go to school.
Set up downstairs before you go - maybe with a big 5 balloon and a banner. Then I'd leave one present for her to open (something small but fun that she can play with/do lots that day) and a card reiterating that you have to work but are so excited to get back for her birthday later, where you'll have cake, presents and a mini party and she's allowed to stay up late as a treat.
Maybe your mum can take her out somewhere fun, or she could even take her to the shops to choose treats for her 'party tea' and do some baking in the afternoon, if she's that kind of grandma. Whatever your daughter enjoys. 5 year olds find fun in all sorts. She'll have a good day and then you can spoil her when you get home.

We do birthday cake breakfast before work/school and then birthday tea and presents afterwards. I'm sure your mum will make a fuss of her all day.