Scared to go in the taxi alone

[Desperatehousewifeswasthebest]

Does anyone else have this?

I generally don’t drink much anymore, maybe the odd one and I drive or Dh does.
We have a 5 year old, I’m in my 40’s and did lots of going out in my youth.
I tend to meet friends for coffee or lunch and don’t really go out in the evenings much without family (some would say that’s quite boring 😅)
Anyway, my mums friends group have been trying to get it sorted to go out for a girls night for ages, it’s coming up. Dh will drop me off, which is fine, we’ll likely drink a bit so will get a taxi back, I’ve realised I’ll be the last on the journey so will be in the taxi alone. It’s sound so ridiculous but it’s making me so anxious
Does anyone else feel this?

Any female taxi companies near you ?

OP I was widowed at 35, so have had to travel about without a DH for the past 31 years.
When I have used taxis in Edinburgh - sometimes Uber, sometimes phoning City Cabs, I have always had interesting conversations with the drivers, and never felt threatened. We have discussed everything from Turkish politics, Scottish independence, religion, our respective children, the state of Edinburgh’s roads, to one driver’s recent bereavement and distress at losing his mentor, which turned into a counselling session. The drivers are just human beings, with their own lives, problems and interests, and not bogeymen out to get you! They certainly don’t want to lose their jobs for harassing their customers.

this thread is quite strange. A simple google news search of ‘women raped by taxi driver’ brings up so many from 2023 alone, Plymouth, Cardiff , Bradford , Bournemouth …. And it goes on. They’re not high profile, they make local news only, and it happens. I have no idea why so many people are dismissing the op’s concerns are ridiculous. Sorry op this won’t reassure you but there’s no point in suggesting this doesn’t happen. It’s really important to protect yourself when travelling in taxis alone at night. I’ve had several creepy encounters with taxi drivers, and only use companies that have excellent text communications/ tracking etc.

update I’m now 12 pages in to my google news search and the 2023 stories just keep on coming 😩

@Smoothiecarton please show your sources. If these are attacks in 2023 then given average prosecution rates and time to get to court I am a bit dubious.

OP I do get where you're coming from and have had similar worries from time to time. However it is not reasonable/rational to allow this to dictate your life. There are lots of risk management actions you can take as PPA have said. And for what it's worth my DFIL used to drive a taxi and he and all his colleagues were just nice blokes earning a living and liking to chat to people!

I had a look at some of those prosecutions for rape by “taxi drivers”. All the ones I found were either unlicensed taxis, men pretending to be taxi drivers who weren’t, or men dragging random drunk women into their vehicles on the street.
I didn’t see any for prebooked taxis operated by reputable firms.

She also leaves a hair in the car as evidence she was there.
Somebody watches too much Criminal Minds

@Babdoc looking at prosecution data doesn’t tell you anything about how many rapes occurred.

Plymsoul, the total number is not the issue for OP. She will be prebooking a shared taxi from a reputable firm, or using a tracked Uber. So she is not at risk from unlicensed drivers or random predators.
Furthermore, she is nervous and needing reassurance, not to have her fears stoked by irrelevant data referring to circumstances in which she will not find herself. Are you just trying to upset her and spoil her night out, by raising unrelated issues?

Is this helping OP?

No, I enjoy the banter with cabbies, always have. Something's got to you and made you unreasonably afraid of everyday things. You should work on it. We all get it with different things.

As long as it’s not an unlicensed cab should be fine.

In what way is it not helping?

The op doesn’t need to overcome her anxiety by pretending that there aren’t risks in life, she needs to overcome it by assessing the risk as accurately as possible and taking rational steps to mitigate the risk.

So taxi wise- use a registered cab/Uber and let someone know what time you should arrive at your destination.

Reminding her that most rapes arent in data was hardly helpful

yeah - her addiction to Law & Order SVU... 🙄

When I was younger if a mate was getting a taxi alone after a night out she’d take a picture of the license plate before she got in and text to us. You can also chat on the phone to your DH in the taxi if you’re nervous.

You've had plenty of good suggestions on here like sharing your location, doing a dummy run, using Uber instead, noting down the reg, being on the phone to your DH or a friend.

A small hairspray? What's that going to do? It's not pepper spray!

Take a pic of the reg, get in the cab, share your location with DH and enjoy your night out.

On the vanishingly small chance you come across an attacker, they're not going to give the tiniest bit of shit while you fumble about in your bag digging out a small can of Elnett.

Why is uber safer out of curiosity?

And yes... desperate housewives WAS/IS the very best!

Just keep reminding yourself how many taxis are in operation with no problems every single day. Take a photo of the license plate and do live location with someone. Or maybe could you sleep over at a friend's? Although this probably isn't best, you should face the fear really.

Of course it’s not unreasonable to feel anxious about being in a vehicle driven by a male stranger where you’re totally out of control. I can’t believe other women are so dismissive of your feelings. Ubers are tracked and are meant to be safer precisely because of these concerns. Make sure you text your DH the reg and tracking details once you’re on your way home. I’m sure you’ll be fine. Good luck!

I worry about this too OP.
I prefer getting buses or trains to getting into an uber. Also hate having to make small talk with the driver so you are not alone in feeling like this x

Agree with this.
I think of John Warboys for instance, and I worry. Particularly if my teenage dd is in a cab alone as she had to be recently, in a distant city.
I had some unpleasant experiences in taxis when I was younger so I get worried about them, I take steps to lower the risk, a local firm, calling the cab etc. i live rurally , we don’t have Uber here.

Personally I worry as much about terrible driving as assault.

Because she is better off hiding from reality? Pretending that nothing bad ever happens in the world?

The op is an adult, I’m sure she can cope with living in the real world.

Pelple are not pretending nothing ever happens. Most posters are very realistic about how small the risk actually is.

See I think trains and buses are really dicey at night, you don't know who will get on/off at each stop, have to deal with drunks, and then you have to walk at the other end with the risk of being followed. TBH the tram here can have some 'characters' on it even during the day, when it gets quiet after the main commute there are often drunks getting on and off I still do it if I have to but a taxi door to door is much more appealing if affordable!