To think we need an antidote after the "What is going on with British kids?" was one of the nastiest ones on here for ages

[Poolnoodlepoodle]

The "What is going on with British kids?" thread is full (thank god). I read the whole thing which I know was silly when it was pissing me off but there we are.

It was full of a lot of judgemental posts about families who (gasp) don't eat at the table which somehow morphed into a pretty shocking discussion on families with ND children.

So please can we have a thread of lovely stories about kids and families being nice to others? An antidote, a bit of positivity.

I'll start, there's a little girl in my dd's class who is blind and in a wheelchair (she can crawl a bit). At the last all class birthday party a group of the kids helped her into the bouncy castle slide thing, they'd learned to tap the floor so she knew where to go, they helped her climb up and slide down and made sure she was included in all the games (pass the parcel / musical statues etc.) It was so lovely to see how they made sure she wasn't left out. My heart grew a little bit ❤️.

I'm a primary teacher and I am constantly impressed by the children in my classes. Yes, you sometimes get rude behaviour, but that is the vast minority and often it indicates something else is going on.

Well I for one, don't judge you. It's kindness Saturday xx

My kids set up an LGBTQ+ group at their secondary school, completely run by and for students to have someone to talk to about any worries they had, they researched and created information booklets, and websites of organisations to speak to about all kinds of things from mental health issues, to which teachers to talk to if they have concerns. They got local speakers to come in and over all created a lovely safe space in their school.
My son is autistic and really struggles with social interaction but this year won a national competition at his college for catering, against able bodied competitors. It was tough for him as it includes a spoken q&a portion and he is non-verbal but his friend volunteered to interpret his signs for him to the judges. That really touched me as he didn’t have to do that.

kids are great, as long as you give them the opportunity to be great.

One quiet Saturday, a long time ago, I had my pocket picked when walking through a group of French schoolkids in a deserted City of London. It cured me of keeping my wallet in my back pocket, but what shocked me was the coordinated way that some 'accidentally' impeded my progress while another did the dipping.
Still, remaining positive, I can attest to Gallic teamwork achieving tangible financial outcomes.

As if European kids are any better.

Just to be clear the other thread pissed me off ALOT. I didn't mean this to be a French children bashing thread.

I really just wanted some positive stories after all the negative ones.

There are some gorgeous ones on this thread thank you so much to everyone who has contributed ❤️.

My son was filling out a questionnaire for a dyspraxia assessment. He's 14. One of the questions was about how good he is at following adult instructions. I was in the room, but only observing.

He told the assessor that he is very good at following instructions, and that this is really important to him, as he wants to maintain the respect of his teachers.

He's such a lovely boy 😍

Oh I'm glad it's cheered me up too. The lovely stories about teens especially I'm always low key worried about when my dd becomes a teen it's nice to hear the can be so lovely 🥰

We went to France for May half term. My youngest was crying after hurting himself. A bunch of slightly older French kids took him under their wings, and gave up their game to play with him, even offered some of their "gouter".

I didn't recognise any of the nasty behaviour I read on the other thread from my (limited) experience travelling in France, being an au-pair there and working with French colleagues.

I love kids, They make me smile and are far superior to most of the adults I know.

My kids have a range of disabilities and screens have been a lifeline.

I only ever hear what a joy they are to teach and I am so proud to be their Mum.

My most disabled child will never live independently but he makes us laugh every day.

I have not once been embarrassed of my kids or ashamed at the way dh and I parent. I have done good.

Conversely, my parents raised four kids who made French kids look riotous. We were well behaved because their parenting was based on physical and emotional abuse.

I got on the late train yesterday and a bunch of late-teens got on too. They'd clearly been drinking, they were a little loud, all was fine. Because they were loud I realised they were on the wrong train, because they'd missed the last one to go to their town. No biggie.

At one point, one of them caught my eye and apologised for being loud. No bother, I said, but I couldn't help overhearing you were on the wrong train, are you OK for getting home? Yep, all was fine they'd sorted a lift.

I got up to go at my stop and then they asked me if I was OK to get home and was someone picking me up. And as I went past one of them said, we just need more people like that lady in the world, people who are kind to the teens instead of shouting at them.

They were actually the best.

Yes, let's not go from bashing British children to bashing French ones.

We spent every summer on a French campsite from when my eldest was five until she and her sister were in their early twenties. They made friends from all over, and when they were little they were pretty much adopted by French teens.
All got along wonderfully and they made friends for life.

There are lovely kids from every country and culture. We might all parent them slightly differently, and cultures might very a little. But demonizing another nationality to defend our own, is being as bad as those at the start of the other thread.

One thing that struck me when I was pregnant was the number of much-maligned teenage boys who either gave up their seat, or asked others to. Teenage boys in London have a bad reputation at times, but they were so polite and helpful.

haven't you noticed that the MC think everything European is 'better'? Especially France. It's bizarre.

The MN default is that absolutely everything is better in Europe and that the UK is some kind of backward shit hole. Those who say this have clearly never actually lived or worked in any part of Europe and probably holiday in Europe in very particular enclaves which they never venture out of so have no interaction with the people of the country they are in bar those who serve them.

I've lived in France, have lots of friends who live there and my DH is Belgian so I spend lots of time in France. Some things are great, some are awful. The people who fawn the most over Europe are usually those who don't really know much about it other than a holiday there! Apparently the kids are all perfect and the women are all thin and chic. Trust me, definitely not true. 😆

Quite, I agree with you having experienced life in many European countries. Some things are better some are much, much worse. Those on MN who believe the UK is a terrible, racist country and think European countries are a utopia of tolerance with no racism are utterly deluded.

At my sons’ school in Australia, the first few years are pretty small. There’s a boy who is autistic, very smart but at sports he just daydreams away, strolls etc. Anyway, when he was in year 2 I believe, I went to watch their school “cross country” (a run around the school finishing up on the main oval). This boy was miles last, jogging around, waving at the parents etc, and completely unprompted, the other boys in his year made an arch with their hands at the finish line for him to run through. It was so downright lovely to see 7 year old kids behaving so nicely.
My boys are older now - my 10 year old always has tiny children adoring him and he always says hello, high fives them, smiles etc because he knows it makes them happy.
My older boy isn’t “sweet” but he’s feisty and I’ve noticed he’ll always quietly look out for younger kids if they’re being picked on and he’ll happily weigh in and tell other kids off in such a calm and diffusing manner that just de escalates things so effectively.

Teenage boys on mumsnet have a terrible reputation
I can only speak from my own experience of having teenage boys ( my youngest is severely disabled so not typical,) but my sixteen year old is lovely, polite and and a pleasure to be around mainly all.though he did complain to.his Dad I was forcing him.to.eat his veg😂
And my two nephews now aged 21 and 19 are nice lads, too.

I have a 14 year old boy and him and his friends are on the surface always taking the p out of each other and behaving generally like you might expect a bunch of 14 year olds to. I thought they were all just a bit daft to be honest
One of them recently had a party and one of the other Mums is actually a teacher at their school (I didn’t know that). She told me that they are known as a really lovely kind and inclusive group and if someone is new or struggling with friendships they send them in the direction of that group and they just get happily absorbed.
It was one of the nicest things I could have heard about my son

Pretty much

British kids are fab. My daughter is so shy and really takes a long time to warm up to people. Her group of friends at school are so kind with her - they never leave her alone if she’s uncomfortable and will hold her hand if she’s feeling nervous. At sports day when she was worried about not being good her group came over and cheered her on. Her little face! I had to really bite my cheek to not cry so I didn’t embarrass her.

Lovely, lovely children.

If you're not classist why mention the tattoo? It was certainly a dog whistle.

Because it’s what other people class as being embarrassing judging by many comments I’ve heard including those on MN.

But you knew that, you just fancied being obtuse

I didn't read the entire thread just the beginning, my cousin lives in France and her DD has autism, from what I've been told they are incredibly backwards over there with how they treat children with ND.

We are out of the push chair days now, but I very often found it was groups of teenagers opening shop doors for me, or telling their friends to make room for us to get past. Definitely not conforming to the stereotypes.

I genuinely think that a lot of the kids who were labelled as bad or naughty when I was in school were neurodivergent and either overwhelmed or lacking impulse control. Things seem to be heading in a much more inclusive direction now. My eldest always came out to eat and behaved impeccably. My youngest can't cope with crowds, queues or waiting and we very rarely eat out now. I guess by the other thread standards I am only half a shit parent!

On more than one occasion, when the DC were small, I left my car sitting on the drive with the doors wide open. It was always a teenager from the (poor reputation) local comp who rang the doorbell to let me know.

My ND child has always loved going out to cafes and restraunts and asks to go. Occasionally when he was younger he would get overwhelmed and have a melt down.