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AIBU?

DD's uni costs

753 replies

WarriorWalrus · 10/07/2023 11:26

DD1 is 17, 18 at the start of August. DH and I can't agree on what costs we should be covering while she is at uni and what she should budget for herself.
Due to our income DD only qualifies for the most basic maintenance loan. We have savings for her, so it won't be out of our monthly income (though I intend to keep putting money into her savings while she is at uni). Her grandparents have offered to pay for her accommodation (£350 a week).
So far we haven't figure out how much her monthly allowance from us will be, but we disagree on what this should cover. DH thinks the amount we set should cover everything, food, clothes, socialising, club fees, holidays etc.
I think food, socialising and day to day clothes sure, but she plans to join one of the sports teams so I think we should pay for the initial registration cost and kit costs, allow her to use money from the savings for travel, she currently gets private coaching in her sport, I think we should pay for this to continue at uni (I know she wants it to) and step in with extra money for more expensive clothes for events or such.
We don't want her to and she doesn't intend to get a job (Uni, Socialising, Sport and extra work to help future career should take up most of her time). But we do want to teach her to budget.
AIBU to think the additional things should be covered by us, anyone with Uni aged kids got a rough idea of how much she will need monthly?

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

557 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
82%
You are NOT being unreasonable
18%
CostelloJones · 16/07/2023 17:46

I don’t really get all the continued fuss on here.

if someone is only entitled to X amount compared to others and their parents are happy to help them out so they have a well rounded uni experience… fine? Would you not give your kids a hand if you could easily afford to? It’s not like any money they give their child would no otherwise go to someone else

Happywe1 · 18/07/2023 16:24

Totally agree with you on that one. she'll be out of touch!

TizerorFizz · 18/07/2023 20:32

Out of touch? With whom? People tend to make friends people like them. Often everyone blends together at work but socialise with friends. So as long as they fit in where they need to, that’s ok. In this case, the tennis club.

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