I hate the cat

[WarriorWalrus]

DD1, 17, got a cat for her 15th birthday, she had been begging for years and loves the cat to pieces, it was a joint bid for the cat, DD1 promising all the care until she left for uni, DD2, (now 14) promising to take over and DH saying he would do care when they aren't around.
Well DD1 just finished her a-levels, left to go travelling with her friends, not back until mid-August (she turns 18 at the start of August). DD2 hates the cat (the cat also hates her, I'm not sure why they have beef but its a no go, the cat just scratches DD2), DH feeds him and changes the litterbox but the cat seems to have decided in the absence of DD1, he wants me, we might have the only clingy cat in the world, but he waits for me to get home, follows me for a bit the goes to lay in DD1s room. Can't say DD1s name in earshot or the cat comes running and follows me again. Middle of the night he scratches my door to be let in, then sleeps in-between DH and I, he loves it, I hate it!!
7 days into DD1 being gone, I've heard from her 4 times, each time "How's Socrates (the cat), Can I see Socrates, show Socrates this video so he doesn't forget me", I send a response (pic of the cat usually) she reacts to it, I ask how she is and get left on read?? Like she only misses and cares for the cat!!!
And to think she is off to uni halls in sept, so this is just my life now!!
AIBU to hate the cat, do any cat whisperers have tips on how I can get the cat to give his love to DH or DD2 and leave me alone???

Cats hate change. He will be feeling anxious and unsettled, hence following you everywhere.

Does anyone play with him? They need stimulation, about 30 mins of playtime a day. It also helps them bond with the human, so DD2 and DH could take on play duties.

If he's scratching at the door, ignore him. If you give in it just reinforces the behaviour. He needs a good play before bed to tire him out.

If he's up on your desk when you're working, put a cat tree or a bed he likes in your office and put treats in it every day so the tree/bed becomes more appealing than the desk. When he goes into his designated place then give him a fuss - positive reinforcement. If you don't like the behaviour, ignore it. If you like the behaviour, give him attention.

I know this is probably a lighthearted thread but there are things you/DD2/DH can do. It's frustrating when people get annoyed with cats' behaviour but don't put effort into training them. Look up Jackson Galaxy for training info.

I don't mean this in a snarky way, but cats are pets that require bonding, attention and effort as much as any other animal, and yes, as much as a dog would. I think people often believe a cat is such an easy pet that you can just have one in the house with you and it'll be fine. You say "we might have the world's only clingy cat", well, no, many people have cats that are attached to them! My cat is very closely bonded to me (had him since his birth), and now to my partner. He would become very bothersome if we neglected to spend proper time and effort on him, because his needs for companionship and stimulation wouldn't be being met.

With respect, you took on an animal - you now have to put in the effort to bond with him and stimulate his mind properly, or yes, you'll have a very "annoying" animal on your hands.

We don't even have any actual cats, but started feeding one very calm feral boy who wasn't being fed, then started feeding 3 feral kittens when their mum got run over, then two barn cats [one a kitten] decided to steal any remaining food at night, and then a mother cat brought her kittens to our garden as she knew we'd give her food...I can't do anything in the garden without beween 1 and 5 cats/kittens following me/running around playing hide and seek with me/leaping onto each other/meeping at me for food.

And the original calm boy sleeps over regularly, snoring and starfishing on my bed the little bugger.

So just the one, meh - amateur hour.

Poor baby just wants a little affection. My dd also phones just to see how her cat is.. so she loves it.. so what? Just show him a bit of love of if that's impossible, get another cat for him- he'll leave you alone then.

I video call my dh to speak to our cats when I'm away with work 😬 after 2 weeks girl cat hears my voice on the phone and will bump her head on it.

I love our fluffy owners, not helpful at all to you op. You just have to come to terms with the facts. You do not own the cat, your cat allows you to live in his house pay all the bills and be at his beck and call. There are no boundaries.

After my dad died my parents cat decided I was his person now. Every single sodding time I'm at the house I have a needy furball trying to get on my lap/get my attention/following me everywhere.

The furball gets plenty of affection and attention from my mother, who loves cats. But it's determined to get the same from me...I'm at best indifferent to the existence of cats - I worst I actively dislike them.

YANBU for being irritated that the cat has decided to pummel you with attention.

God I understand because I have the same problem! I don't love cats but the cats (which I had no part in buying) LOVE me and only me. Sometimes they're cute but it's very annoying how clingy and disruptive they get.

My DS (cat lover/expert) says cats tend to gravitate towards non cat lovers because they're calmer and less grabby. Cat lovers tend to want to stroke and grab and fuss a lot. So maybe we need to start cooing over the cats to make them stalk off lol

I also don't understand all the crazy cat ladies on here who dictate that everyone within a 1km radius of cats MUST worship the animal's existence

I genuinely find lizards and snakes (especially when they're shy) cute but if I brought a bloody snake home, promised to take care of it alone, and it decided to latch on to my DH, he would be within his rights to get annoyed wouldn't he, it's not his pet

Also just to add, it interrupts my Zoom calls and screams like a baby being dismembered... When the rest of the family are trying desperately to lure it towards them to play!

You’ve been chosen! My DH grew up with dogs, was 100% not a cat person. I had a cat when we met. She adopted him before I agreed to marry him and sleeps on him every night. He is now a cat person. Just accept your fate 🐱😅

I'm envious I'd love a cat like him.
My existing cat is the affectionate type and you just have to go along with it.
Cats are generally social animals and most crave attention wherever they can get it.😁

Oh my, he is stunning! Your post made me laugh, the thought of the cat having "beef" with your DD2 😂no advice from me, I'm afraid, but as pp have said, you ARE the chosen one!

My cats love whichever person feeds them at any given meal.

Bribe him with food (or get DH or DD2 to bribe him)

Also another cat - which probably feels quite counter intuitive - could work. My little cat bothers my big cat and not me. Although big cat still bothers me so it hasn't really solved my issue and I have double the cost and double the cat fur 😂 (but double the joy!!)

I know you clarified you don't hate the cat @WarriorWalrus but your thread title is literally "I hate the cat" so I can see why some posters have taken it to heart.

I think your ‘joke’ hate for a friendly cat has backfired.

Omg this upset me, genuinely if you don't want the cat I'd take him. I couldn't imagine hating my cat I got her when I was 17 too and she is my world.

Cats are always attracted to people who don’t like them. It’s another one of their niche features which make them cats. Sorry. You need to learn to love the cat.

I think people are taking this post far too seriously in calling you unfair for hating the cat, and not in the humorous manner it was intended 😂.

You’ll grow to love the cat…they have a way of weaselling their cute little way in eventually 😆

Poor cat. He sounds lonely. I have two Siamese and originally had one. I quickly realised he needed a pal. But he adopted me as his chosen one and has been glued to me ever since. My son is 18 months and he's adopted him as a chosen person too 😹. My cats are extremely needy, loud, loving, destructive if they don't get enough attention. But I love them soo much. If you don't love the cat maybe look at rehoming him. Attached a pic of my two Siamese boys.

This haha it’s clearly tongue in cheek and she’s not abusing the cat FFS!

Omg If I considered rehoming the cat DD would disown me, I'm have been joking about hating the cat but very serious about DD disowning me.

Sorry to inform you OP. Your cat is either purebred Norwegian Forest Cat or has some Maine Coone.

You are fucked. These cats HAVE humans - I know as I am the faithful servant to one. They are vocal and needy. Day and night. My girl is 15 and is obsessed with me.

You have two options:

1. Rehome Socrates- it's what I would do, if I were you.
2. Learn to love your little shadow, as you won't be given a choice. This is what I have done.

Your DD needs to take responsibility for the welfare of her cat and understand that this animal needs more than she can offer.

Get your younger child to feed the cat and give it treats that will do the trick. Every meal for a few weeks.

Bollocks. There's something wrong with someone who makes stupid statements like yours though.

#teamSocrates

The looney MN Cat Fanciers are well triggered though.
Reason #2367 why I will never, ever get a cat.