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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that the rules are RIDICULOUS and infantilising?

398 replies

OhBling · 09/07/2023 18:37

Was just in a Co Op buying a few bits. DS negotiated with me that I'd buy him a Monster, and he'd drink half (they are such huge tins it drives me mad)....

... the man in co op would not sell it to me because I was going to give it to a child.

FFS. I'm an adult. He is my child. I can decide what he can and can't have. And caffeine is NOT illegal for children.

I'm also fully aware that lots of people will say I AM BU because no child should ever drink anything except fresh water, preferably from your local stream.... But I'm extremely annoyed. These rules are ridiculous.

OP posts:
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7
Goldencup · 10/07/2023 05:50

OhBling · 09/07/2023 21:13

This has been entertaining. Had no idea the response would be so intense!

He is 13 - but tall for his age.

As a pp mentioned, we are not too stressed about some caffeine as a short term support for inattentive adhd and overall I don't mind a bit of caffeine anyway, although not a whole can of Monster! Based on the wide variety of healthy, academically successful, pleasant and polite children I meet regularly through my children and friends, I feel pretty confident I am not the only who feels this way, notwithstanding this thread!

To all those frothing about me wanting to get the assistant fired etc etc - projecting much?! I was complaining about the rules, not the polite young man who was enforcing it! He certainly did the right thing to enforce the store policy as its his job on the line I assume. I still think the rule is ridiculous.

Haha re co op not being open. Its 2023!

Being accused of being a wind up has been bizarre but strangely entertaining! Not least because I've been on here since at least 2008, possibly earlier! Certainly never been accused of that before!

So you are proxy self medicating your son with energy drinks age 13 ?
OMG this just gets worse. Take it from me this ain't going to help his ADHD at all.

I actually think your mad.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 10/07/2023 05:57

Who wouldn’t want this as part of their child’s diet? 🤨

  • Carbonated Water, Sucrose, Glucose Syrup, Acid (Citric Acid), Flavourings, Taurine (0.4%), Acidity Regulator (Sodium Citrates), Panax Ginseng Root Extract (0.08%), L-Carnitine L-Tartrate (0.04%), Preservatives (Sorbic Acid, Benzoic Acid), Caffeine (0.03%), Colour (Anthocyanins), Vitamins (B3, B6, B2, B12), Sweetener (Sucralose), Sodium Chloride, D-Glucuronolactone, Guarana Seed Extract (0.002%), Inositol, Maltodextrin
electriclight · 10/07/2023 06:00

Some people really can't cope with being told 'no'. Go and buy it elsewhere lest your child experiences unacceptable levels of disappointment. That way he learns how to deal with rules he disagrees with. Obviously, one day, it might be your rules he disagrees with and seeks to circumvent.

RatatouilleAndFeta · 10/07/2023 06:20

Bababear987 · 09/07/2023 19:13

Jesus there should be some sort of test before people are allowed to have children? Why on earth would you give something like that to a child?

Yep

Fireandflames666 · 10/07/2023 06:22

Energy drinks are bloody awful and should be banned. Children shouldn't be touching the stuff, it's way too much for them.

violinviolet · 10/07/2023 06:40

He's doing his job as the law states

Sirzy · 10/07/2023 06:50

Codlingmoths · 10/07/2023 04:45

I think it would be really helpful for a study or article to explain if kids with adhd whose behaviour can benefit from caffeine are still subject to all the health negatives. It’s easy as a parent to go well it helps with this so then forget about all the downsides that are why many parents wouldn’t let their kids touch the stuff. If I were letting my kid have caffeine earlier than I would normally due to adhd (which I may be doing when my oldest is about 10,12) I’d make sure it was stuff that came with minimal levels of synthesised crap, and ideally not too much sugar. Buy a good coffee machine. Let them make a coffee.

I have just done a brief google scholar search and (without delving beyond the abstracts because it’s way to early in the morning for that) from what is available it seemed to suggest there is not enough evidence to prove any clinical benefits from self medicating with caffeine and for young people it is best avoided because of the documented side effects from use of caffeine

dollybird · 10/07/2023 07:10

I'm with everyone else on energy drinks for kids (or anyone!). Just no. Although 17 year old DS was refused when wanting to buy Irn Bru once 🤷

Codlingmoths · 10/07/2023 07:30

Sirzy · 10/07/2023 06:50

I have just done a brief google scholar search and (without delving beyond the abstracts because it’s way to early in the morning for that) from what is available it seemed to suggest there is not enough evidence to prove any clinical benefits from self medicating with caffeine and for young people it is best avoided because of the documented side effects from use of caffeine

Show quote history

Wow thank you, that’s really helpful! definitely means I’ll look into it before thinking oh it might help, let him have one.
@OhBling you might be interested.

VegetablesFightingToReclaimTheAubergieneEmoji · 10/07/2023 07:35

dollybird · 10/07/2023 07:10

I'm with everyone else on energy drinks for kids (or anyone!). Just no. Although 17 year old DS was refused when wanting to buy Irn Bru once 🤷

Not Scottish enough?

HeadacheEarthquake · 10/07/2023 08:04

NeverDropYourMooncup · 09/07/2023 19:41

The one round the corner from us is open until 10.30pm.

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All of them - they close at 10 or 11

dollybird · 10/07/2023 10:09

VegetablesFightingToReclaimTheAubergieneEmoji · 10/07/2023 07:35

Not Scottish enough?

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😆

Newnamenewname109870 · 10/07/2023 11:55

Goldencup · 10/07/2023 05:50

So you are proxy self medicating your son with energy drinks age 13 ?
OMG this just gets worse. Take it from me this ain't going to help his ADHD at all.

I actually think your mad.

Show quote history

I agree!!! Op this is going to be awful for his adhd!!

BCCoach · 10/07/2023 12:06

motherofawhirlwind · 10/07/2023 00:37

I was totally against these drinks but then DD had one (OH bought it), said her brain went quiet, and we realised she had ADHD. So they're not all bad....

Her psychiatrist days this is common and meant the meds would help her. She still has an occasional can, but not plus the meds. That way madness and death by chattering incessantly lies. Grin

DS started stealing our coffee aged 8 which is when we realised. Now 12 he has a strong coffee every morning with breakfast (along with his ADHD meds), and another one at lunchtime (his school canteen has a coffee bar).

bronzepig · 10/07/2023 12:32

Newnamenewname109870 · 10/07/2023 11:55

I agree!!! Op this is going to be awful for his adhd!!

Show quote history

@OhBling If caffeine appeared to be helping his ADHD symptoms, I'd be wanting to speak to a pyschiatrist/HCP who could advise on whether this is overall beneficial (I'm sure there are other negative impacts of caffeine?) and if so how best to do it.

I doubt Monster is the best vehicle for caffeine given all the other stuff in there - I'd be far more comfortable with giving him an espresso if indeed I was advised it was a good idea.

Is he on other ADHD meds?

Original poster
OhBling · 10/07/2023 12:47

Don't worry, I'm not giving him Monster for ADHD. I just made the point that we are less stressed about SOME caffeine than other people are, and yes, we will absolutely be speaking to a doctor when we get our assessment in a few months time! We can't wait! Although maybe he doesn't have ADHD but rather has been permanently damaged by being allowed to try Monster 3 or 4 times!? Grin

I can't remember who did a deep dive on my posting history (bizarre) but yes, I fudge my children's ages on here regularly! Genders too. Also, my age, DH's age, and the number, gender and age of my siblings! I thought everyone did that for privacy reasons?

Thanks for everyone's responses. Notwithstanding your views, I feel pretty confident I'm not a terrible parent and I'm actually quite proud of how we've supported DS over the last few years, but it's been interesting to read and food for thought.

OP posts:
MonkeypuzzleClimber · 10/07/2023 15:20

It was me about the age. Not really a ‘deep dive’ as you post a lot, and have said he is 12 multiple times in recent of months. Easy to see right away with with the quick look I did before deciding if it was unreasonable before you had posted his age. Only relevant as it’s actually relevant to the AIBU.

To be honest, I’m actually slightly on the fence about this one. Not about them refusing you. I don’t think it’s at all unreasonable for shops to have rules about selling energy drinks to kids as there are proposals to make it illegal to sell them to kids in the pipeline, and I don’t know about Monster, but Prime states on it’s website they are not suitable for under 18s. Initially I was slightly horrified at the thought, but to be fair my daughter of a similar age was absolutely shattered after a relentless week and had another concert this weekend. She was completely wiped out after the rehearsal so I gave her 2/3 of my coffee to see her through the concert (she is normally only allowed decaf). Less caffeine than half a Monster, but she’s tiny so probably not half the size of your son, so maybe the caffeine is comparable for body weight? I guess the difference is you don’t ever hear of kids ending up in A&E from too many lattes. It’s only a cultural difference (apart from all the other crap in it) but maybe it’s actually an important one in terms of setting an example and safe boundaries?

lieselotte · 10/07/2023 16:27

Fightyouforthatpie · 09/07/2023 19:40

I've no idea why we're all so silly in this country about ID cards

I'd hazard a guess it's all the awful fuck ups any government agency makes in this coountry - you'd have to wait 3 years for your "card" due to "unforseen staff shortages" and then it would be in someone else's name and the quickest way to sort it out would be to steal their fucking identity.

Fair point, but this was back in 2010ish before we had this shower for a government :)

Mumof3girlygirls · 10/07/2023 17:46

I wouldn't feed that poison to myself let alone someone I care more about..... my child!!! Shocking you think it's OK and the shop keeper cares more about your son than you do apparently🙄

celticprincess · 10/07/2023 17:59

Is it a cO op rule or a government national rule/law. Like the one about not serving alcohol to an adult if they have a child with them (although I’m curious to the lower limit for age requirement on that one as I’ve had my younger children with me doing the weekly food shop containing a crate of Guinness so wonder if it is any child who’s could be teen upwards who’s parent could be buying the alcohol for them?)

GoodChat · 10/07/2023 18:00

So is he actually 13 @OhBling?

TheOrigRights · 10/07/2023 18:00

I wish our local shop challenging kids buying this stuff.

Peppermintpatty24 · 10/07/2023 18:02

These drinks are bad for the heart, and have up to 20 teaspoons of sugar per can. I think monster in particular has 19 teaspoons of sugar.

Carpediemmakeitcount · 10/07/2023 18:02

I wouldn't put that shit in my body. You might as well buy him coca cola or if you really want to give an energy drink there is healthier alternatives.

Montbab · 10/07/2023 18:04

Energy drinks are actually age restricted so he was just doing his job