DD Interrailing

[LeBearTeddy]

DD1 turned 18 at the end of June, she had some money from her birthday and grandparents gave her more. Now she and 3 friends have impulsively decided they are going interrailing!! They've booked flights, hostels, sorted their travel days all in the last week or so. They leave on Monday and I'm so anxious. They are starting in Lisbon and taking a sort of weird route to Vienna. I feel like because they have arranged it in such a hurry something is bound to go wrong, they will have forgotten something etc. I'm also really upset as I was looking forward to summer with her, but now she gets back A-Level Results week and the week after is going to Greece with a big group of her sixth form friends, then 2 weeks after is move in week at uni!! I feel like I have no time left with her.
DD2 is having panic attacks thinking something bad is going to happen (she is 13).
AIBU to be so nervous? Anyone with any experience Interrailing got any advice I should pass on to her? Anything she should pack she might have forgotten?

Interrail holidays are fantastic, and a great antidote to a break up! I can understand your younger daughter missing her, especially if she's leaving for uni at end of summer but really I hink u need to address her anxiety re trip. I'd have thought most 13 year olds who's sibling was going off on such a trip would be envious, imagining where they'd go etc. I think maybe given you suffer from some anxiety yourself, that you should do your best not to let her see it, and remember kids see and hear way more than we think! Hope she has a lovely trip !

When mine did this, I transferred some money half way through the time. You always spend more than you think, and it can be nerve wracking counting days v money left! Try and send her off with a smile-cry once she's gone! Avoid putting any guilt at all on her. Don't put any pressure on her to keep in touch. "It would be lovely to see the occasional picture if you get the chance"

YABU-she’s an adult. Leave her to it and don’t worry at all - she’ll be with friends. They’ll have an amazing time

Definitely. I was ill abroad and my replacement GHIC hadn't arrived and I was able to use the code on the email.

Yabu.
I went at 18 and had a great time. Well nearly fell out with my friend but we held it together and are still great friends many years on.
Some annoying experiences but no dodgy ones. Met loads of lovely people. I’d recommend it to any young adult.

just make sure she has good insurance and in it all goes horribly wrong have cash on hand to pay for a flight home.

ps When I did it it was pre-mobile phone /social media and I was asked nicely to call once a week! My parents must have fretted slightly, but never let on.

I went off to Greece with a friend after A levels for several weeks (got home the day before we got our results)

This was 1976. Not only were there no mobiles, my parents hadn't even got a landline installed so apart from writing a couple of letters home, they had NO idea how I was getting on.

Sounds fabulous, what an amazing summer she’s having.

Don’t let on you’re worried or annoyed at not spending time with her, wave her off with a big smile. It’s not about you and I mean that kindly. Be thrilled she’s so proactive and confident enough to do this.

My DD did this at 18 and it was an incredible experience.

Sounds amazing! I loved interrailing. It was one of the best times of my life.

You should be really pleased you've raised such a confident and adventurous daughter

She's with a group of friends and it sounds like she's sticking to the more developed European countries. She'll have a blast.

I did inter railing at 18 and it was a brilliant experience. I remember feeling very grown up and learning a lot about culture on the various walking and cycling tours. I also have a memory of cycling through Tiergarten in Germany and almost crashing at the shock of all the old naked men!

Sounds fabulous. The only things is get her to do are to make sure she leaves you with photocopies and digital copies of her passport, ghic, insurance documents and ticket(s) and maybe any credit card/etc too, so that if they do encounter a problem you will be able to provide some support. Likewise if you have a copy of her travelling companions' details and they have their parents having your dd's details. And she needs to take a photocopy of her details with her and have them accessible online (eg in a Gmail account) so that she can access them too if needed - if she does have a problem and loses her passport it's much easier to get it reissued and sorted out if she has all the info with her.
If also get her to have a money belt and/or money scrunchie/etc that she can put some money and cards in - she's not going to want to rely on just keeping things safe in her main bag and day bag!

Also make sure she knows what to do if she does have a problem - something is lost or stolen, will she need to report it to the police, get a crime number, report from the hostel or anything else? If she wants to claim on her health insurance, will she need to use her ghic first or does she need to call the insurance 24 hour helpline before doing anything for a claim to be valid? And so on... Different situations, different policies, different countries etc - just so long as she is aware of all the'obligations' that some of these things come with - if she were to have her bag stolen it would be gutting to discover that she wasn't covered because she didn't get a crime number at the right time or that her health cover didn't cover the initial treatment because she hadn't phoned up before going to the hospital...

Also try to persuade her to take pictures of lots of the little details as she goes around - tickets, name of places, attractions, stations, snacks, being in supermarkets or food shops, places where she stays, as well as the main sights and her friends - it will really help her remember her trip when she comes back and make for a much better photo book if she decides to go down that route for making her memories afterwards, bit will also be nice to talk through and show you and her sister on her return, without putting pressure on her at the time. If she is able to upload it to something like Instagram or Amazon prime photo storage (if you have Prime? It's got good free photo storage!) as she goes, and you're able to see what's going on then that's a bonus for you :)

Make sure she leaves plenty of space in her rucksacks and bag before she goes on case she wants to buy any souvenirs or gifts, and that she takes at least 1 plastic wallet that she can seal watertight to put all her leaflets, brochures, tickets, maps, guides etc in as she travels around.

Encourage her to have a fantastic time and say that you and dd2 are looking forward to hearing all about it on her return. Can she do anything to get dd2 interested or involved rather than worried? Even if it's just too take pictures of dogs that she thinks she will find cute or the biggest cream cakes she spots in each destination... Something that will change the narrative around and not make it as worrying...

Sounds fabulous- I am jealous. They will have a great time & get loads of life lessons.

Just make sure she does have travel insurance (easy to forget) and let her enjoy this time. You can buy things in Europe if you need stuff (although less is better imho).

I went to Greece for 3 weeks at 19 in 1984. Managed to phone home once when one island had a public phone line. Otherwise no contact. Looking back my parents must have been nervous. My sister is 8 years older than me and inter-railed in one of her uni summers so they’d had practice.
she’ll be fine. It’s no unreasonable to be nervous for her. It would be unreasonable to let her know you are. And you should try to reassure your younger DD too.

Like others, I went inter railing for 30 days long before mobile phones and long before the internet.
We just had a train pass and a budget of about £10 a day/night for all accommodation, food, treats, entrance to places etc. That was back before the Euro so we had to spend all coins each time we moved country and get currency for the next country. No contactless then and we didn't have credit cards etc.
We sent my Mum one postcard, and I think sent my Gran one postcard and that was it. We didn't have an itinerary, so our parents had no idea which country we were in even.
It was a different time, but so much easier for us as parents now than it must have been for my parents to wave us off.
My dc has just got back from inter-railing and they had been able to look things up beforehand on the internet, and they had contactless cards for spending, and had things like Google maps to search for anything. It is SO much safer than it ever was.