I can do what I want..

[anony3mous]

How can I respond to this comment from DH.

Background:
he does nothing at home to help and I literally mean nothing. I clean, cook, take kids to schools and pick them up. Do the shopping, sort out social things for kids and family. I’ve had enough of him. I work full time now too. Usually I did temping so could take a day off for childcare when needed but now in new job I can’t take time off. DD school is finishing next week, I still have to work for 3 more weeks. I’ve sorted childcare for the last 2 weeks but next week I need him to pick her up Wednesday half day and look after her Thursday. Friday is sorted already. His response was I can do what I want I don’t have to discuss with you! Do he won’t give me an answer and tells me he doesn’t need to.

Tell him I can do what I want too and I want a divorce. And mean it.

My response would be to do what I want - and leave the lazy prick.

Bloody hell. Don’t know where to start with this one!

Have some standards. If he does absolutely nothing, he brings nothing to your life. Unless you really depend on him for money, you will have easier life by not accepting poor behaviour from men.

seriously? What are you expecting anyone to say other than "leave him"? It sounds like he has zero respect for you or engagement as a member of the family, so what is the point in continuing?

I never ceases to amaze me that so many women live like this.

Do nothing for him then bin him. What is the point of him?

Stop letting him walk all over you. He obviously doesn't give a shit about you. Listen to what he's telling you and act accordingly.

What the fuck do you get from this 'relationship'?

Just quietly get up and leave for work at 6am and leave him with DD.

He'll learn.

Stop picking up after him and enabling him to live like a dickhead.

Sorry OP but you’re not your wife you’re his skivvy, and he won’t change at this rate.

Leave and get your life back OP, sounds like enough has been wasted with this man already and nothing will change.

Outside of work all household and childcare should be split 50/50. If he's not willing to do that then end it.

I'd say either he fucks off and then he can really do what he wants, or he stays and pulls his weight.

Tell him he can do what he wants in his own house. What a waste of oxygen!

Why are you with this man?

What do you get from this relationship?

Why do you accept this and in turn let your DD grow up thinking this is acceptable?

If you continue to put up with this he'll continue to think he can do what he wants.

And he'll be right.

You want to know how to respond to a father who is refusing to discuss childcare?

I can do what I want I don’t have to discuss with you!

I suggest you say

If you do what you want on Weds afternoon and Thursday, and don’t step up to look after DD, and I have to take the time off work, I’ll leave you. So you can ‘do what you want’, I guess, it’s up to you.

I really can't see any way back from a comment like that.

He may as well have said you're shit on my shoe. He's treating you with utter disrespect.

I’m sorry but you’ve brought this on yourself op. My reply to him would be to tell him to go fuck himself and file for divorce.

"And I can do what I want too! I want a divorce!"

I'd be doing what I wanted to and that would be filing for divorce. No loss - you have a job and do everything else anyway. The only difference is you won't be cooking and cleaning for him too and he won't be annoying you with his misogynistic attitude. Oh and he'll have to pay CM, that's the law. He can't just say he "doesn't want to". Odious man.

I agree. I don’t see how discussions or counselling would change a man who thinks his wife is his slave. Do you want DC to grow up believing that?

I don’t often say “leave the bastard”, but I can’t see any other solution.

We have a unanimous verdict here @anony3mous