Teachers - are your 6-8 year olds this rude?

[WhaleBlue]

I work in lots of different schools working with small groups of children aged between 6 & 8. More recently I’ve noticed the level of interrupting when I’m speaking, not listening to instructions and generally thinking what they have to say is far more important than what I have to stay really off putting.

I’ve been doing the same role for over 20 years and never had any real issues, but over recent months am becoming more frustrated with this. Is it just my area or is it the same across the UK?

God only knows how their class room teacher copes with about 30 of them at the same time.

This is also something that they have expressed an interest in which their parents are paying for.

I work with challenging teens and that's not a strategy that would work with them unfortunately!

You've just described the class I work in - especially the calling out and thinking what they have to say is more important than what is being taught - it's being put down to being covid kids. It's hard work

I have a 6 and 8yo and I'm a health care professional who works with children of all ages. I've also helped out with beavers - who are a rowdy bunch.

I can see the effect at all ages of covid/ lockdowns. Struggling with socialising, excessive screentime. Kids seem less mature for their age. They've missed the normal experiences that shape that maturity. Transition from year 6-7 has been especially rocky.

I do think this age were hit at a critical time and as a parent it was horrendous trying to both work (NHS) home school and entertain 2 young children. We will be seeing the effects unfold over decades.

I work with a similar age group op and feel the same. Everyone I know who works with children agrees. I do think it is the legacy of covid but not just because the children missed so many opportunities for learning and socialisation, but because their parents are far more overprotective and indulgent. I have far more parents who work tirelessly to protect their child from any worry, difficulty or challenge. Experiences that were considered a normal part of growing up, persevering, learning resilience and so on are now routinely challenged by parents seeking to create a perfect world for their child. It upsets me to see children limited and stunted by their parents' inability to see them challenged in any way.

I'm absolutely finding the same. Constant interruptions. Chipping in with advice or criticisms. Coming in from the playground and asking 'what are we doing now?' like we are on a nice day out instead of sitting down and waiting or glancing over at the timetable.

@Herejusttocomment and @Mojitosaremyfavourite I know a couple of good supply teachers who bear this out, and am a headteacher so anecdotally heard and seen for myself that there are lots of issues with years 3 and 4 (about to move to 4 & 5).
They were reception and year 1 at the start of lockdown and it's like they've got stuck at that stage of interaction and development. We've worked really hard on addressing this but for some children it's still a real struggle, especially those who didn't come back in summer 2020 despite it being offered.
Having said that, the issues of declining listening skills, oracy, good manners and behaviour was noticeable pre-pandemic.
I deal with a gaming/internet/Tik Tok/social media related issue at least weekly and have never had as many parents asking for help with their children attacking them, swearing at them and refusing to do as requested.

Well said @electriclight

I’m in secondary and behaviour has got much tougher - especially in the playground and corridors. So much worse - I don’t think we really recognise we will be dealing with consequences for such a long time. I’d say even reception children have been affected and it won’t be until they finish school we stop seeing the impacts.

i know I’m not with your age ranges but it is definitely covid related. I’ve been a teacher for 12 years.

I completely agree. I was finding that anytime a child was told “no” or challenged in the slightest way, even if you offered a more practical solution to something they were struggling with, you were apparently “bullying” them. I love being around children and young people but have increasingly found their inability to understand the human condition doesn’t support being “happy” ALL THE TIME incredibly sad and frustrating.

Current reception were toddlers in lock down, not babies

@Butteredtoast55 that's really interesting. To be fair, I started working in a school in 2018 so don't have that perspective so that's really helpful to learn.

@Mojitosaremyfavourite Re:strikes, the classes closed are those whose teachers are striking. It is not the Head who "prioritises" chosen year groups to open.

@Mojitosaremyfavourite oh, there is definitely an effect on Reception age. Since the start of the school year, we basically had to teach each child how to play with each other, how to role play, how to take turns, skills that usually start to develop in toddlerhood. (I'm in a support role btw)

I agree completely. I set boundaries and am firm from the outset. Some children look completely taken aback when I tell them they need to listen. Some even respond with ‘but I need to tell you something/ show you something.’ I respond ‘is it to do with the lesson?’ It never is, they want to tell me where they’re going on holiday or what they had for tea. It’s of course normal for children to want to chat and tell me something but I say to wait until the end of the lesson. Some look so upset!
The most frustrating for me is I’m trying to explain something and they constantly interrupt. If they waited a few more seconds they would have the answer to their question.
I do really enjoy my job, it’s just this low level disruption and interruption is becoming more and more apparent. It’s also not really fair on the handful of children who can listen and want to learn. It’s just something that seems to be worsening.
Anyway I’ll carry on with the polite reminders to listen and they can tell me all about their holiday or whatever at the end of the lesson.

When I volunteered to help out at Beavers I didn't realise how much time I would spend telling other people's children off.
Some of it I think is that the children don't actually want to be there. Their parents think it is a 'wholesome' activity so want them to go and as a club it's good value for money.
We go on walks, do den building, play team games, fishing, craft activities etc so there is plenty for them to do. Some of the children answer back a lot, refusing to be out of a game when they've been caught out, talk over people and they don't even know the others names despite it being a relatively small group.
I actually wonder if it's partially down to how much attention they get from their parents. If their parents are engrossed in devices themselves they don't interact with children as they used to or pull them up on their behaviour.

I have found similar issues in FE. In 2021/22, we suddenly had an influx of kids who were just really immature.

We’d never really had major behaviour issues but all of a sudden I was being called “a pathetic fat bitch” for politely asking a group to be quiet in the corridors while I taught as we had to have the doors open for covid reasons (apparently I should have “shut the fucking door if [I] wanted quiet”). I wouldn’t have been shocked if I’d encountered it in a local comp (trust me I’ve worked in all of them!) but in FE it just wasn’t really heard of!

Same with kids falling out with each other - very year 9 dramatic mean girls type behaviour from kids in the equivalent of years 12/13. However, at the time that had been their last “normal” year of schooling so it made perfect sense they were stuck in the mode of year 9 drama - they’d not had the opportunity to really develop more.

We also had lots of kids shocked they weren’t going to be told the topics covered in their end of year exam in 2022. They’d been told for the GCSEs so it was completely foreign to them that they had to revise the entire syllabus (and according to them a “very unfair” way to do things!)

I can only imagine the same is true for all kids. In fact, I spoke to a secondary teacher who said the same about year 7s that year… just incredibly immature for their age.

I think this is absolutely true electriclight

I do think parents have become more protective and indulgent anyway and Covid seems to have really exacerbated it.

Our Yr 4 also wild. Real social problems and violence. A good few families have now left for private as so disruptive.

I really think it's parents on phones and not giving kids attention.
These kids have had parents staring at their phones since birth... had to fight to get adult attention over WhatsApp and Instagram.

I know I'm guilty of it too with my own kids.

How do you explain the fact that it's across all year groups, and as one poster stated even in FE.

@AngryGreasedSantaCatcus well how long have smart phones been around...

I also think we’re in a period of endemic poor parenting. No boundaries, unlimited screens, ‘friend’ parents who say yes immediately to everything and provide immediate gratification. These kids don’t understand waiting, esp if they are also on screens too long where everything happens immediately. normal life rules then appear horrifically slow.

And don’t get me started on behaviour. It’s not just year 4. My child’s year 6 group are really quite horrid, very badly behaved, bitchy girls and fearless boys who take the piss out of older kids with no care. It feels very odd to someone in their mid 40s as the normal social rules just don’t seem to apply. And these kids were indulged toddlers - ‘kind hands’ after child punched another in the face - so I’m not sure it’s all covid or all screens or all parenting but the combination of all 3 is horrific. Poor teachers.

I still have screen time on my teen’s phone. Two hours a day and off at 8 until 8 the next morning when she leaves for school. she is thd only one. All of them on screens til late hours, they must be exhausted too. There are just no boundaries around, it’s no wonder they are all so feral.

I agree with this. Our current y7 are the least secondary ready I have ever met. Nife kids displaying all the behaviours the op described, constant shouting out, answering back interrupting etc. They seem to have no impulse control and a constant need for attention.

I am a TA in year 2 and our current year 2s are the worst year band in the whole school for behaviour issues. To the point that next year they are being put into 3 classes instead of 2 to make it more manageable for their teachers and support staff. Some children are Sen and we have more sen children in the school than ever before but collectively they all struggle to listen and concentrate. We also deal with rudeness numerous times daily. They struggle with friendships and just generally are not very emotionally mature for their age. I think it is partly down to the pandemic, they had their early years heavily impacted and it's those years that focus on listening, sitting on carpet etc. It's also sometimes down to shitty parenting. I have one girl who is the most obnoxious rude child I have ever met. You follow the behaviour policy and give her reminders that she will miss 5 minutes of her break time and she tells us she doesn't care, dad will give her what she wants when she gets home anyway and he does. She is being ruined by her parents who have never told her no a day in her life although fair play to mum who is now realising and is putting consequences in place. Consequently her behaviour in school is also now improving.

First iphone was 2007. So 16 years ago. And it took a while for the world to catch up and develop the usage we see today.