Considering getting a cleaner for chaotic, busy house

[KellyanneConway]

Our house is rarely properly clean. I work full time, DH part time & doesn’t seem to be able to keep on top of stuff. Also living here are DS 23 student, DS’s gf working full time, DSC 16 & 14 in college & school, DbigDog, 2 Dcats. There is always someone in: eating, making a mess, friends shoes in hall, dog’s footprints if one of the kids have let him in without wiping his feet etc. We have so much laundry including sports kits, 4 sets of bedding, dog walking & outdoor stuff. DS does his & gfs, DH & me do the rest and when it rains there is not enough room in the utility for all of it so ends up dotted around the house to dry.

House was doer upper now finished but needs a good paint that we don’t have time for and can’t get a decorator to do it. We have a place for everything but there are so many people here it can get cluttered. I’m thinking of getting a cleaner to help us keep on top of things but realistically would any one touch us with a barge pole? People who I know who have cleaners live in show home type conditions and have small families who are out in the day.

Anyone on here a cleaner, would you take us on? Anyone live in similar circumstances but have a regular cleaner?

YABU no way would a cleaner take you on or last long
YANBU this is the kind of home that is part and parcel of a domestic cleaner’s normal workload

You work full time..
Get a bloody cleaner

A cleaner didn’t help us at all and actually made things worse!

The big problem is tidying before they come so they can clean. Then half the time they cancel or rearrange last minute so you’ve done it for nothing. Ours was awful. I don’t think I’ll ever get a cleaner again to be honest.

Get a cleaner to free up time for tidying. But it sounds like you have enough adults in the house to be able to keep the place tidy if they all pull their weight!

I would say the dirt aspect - footprints, crumbs - is really not an issue, that is the cleaner’s job.

Having clothes or stuff everywhere is more of an issue as it means they can’t clean without having to do lots of tidying first and they don’t know where stuff goes. Some cleaners don’t mind and will just charge for the extra time, some find it annoying.

We have a weekly cleaner and I make everyone spend 10 mins tidying before she comes. Not show home tidy but stuff put in piles or into baskets rather than spread everywhere, so the floor and main surfaces are clear. We have a few baskets around which are useful for this (shoes and kids stuff especially) . If things have been left out the cleaner puts it into the closest basket or drawer.

Yes, but make sure that on the day before they come, everyone mucks in to tidy up, I'd do it on a day when your DH doesn't work, then he can get the dog out of the way.

Also get a tumble dryer!

My cleaner tidys, organises, puts washing away, and generally keeps us looking not like a cess pit. We advertised for a cleaner/housekeeper and we're very clear about what we needed and obviously she is employed for enough hours to get everything done.

Depends on the cleaner!

Ours is worth his weight in gold. When he started he did a deep clean first. This included all the windows, deep clean of all white goods, inside all cupboards etc.

Now he comes 1 x week for 3 hours regular cleaning and it makes a huge difference. He is fine with tidying up some things (folding the laundry if it's dry, changing the bedsheets, throwing dogs toys in the washing machine etc). We discussed all this before he started and he was fine with this. We pay above the going rate for our area though, because I am aware that not every cleaner would be fine with tidying up part as well.

Yes, get a cleaner. We're a bit messy- definitely not a show home- and our cleaner is a godsend. A good cleaner will work with you and understand what it is that you're looking for. Would recommend finding someone by personal recommendation and definitely an individual rather than an agency who send different people every week.

Sounds like our place DDog and 2 DCats except only me, DH and DD there.
So glad you asked, because I put off getting a cleaner as I'm embarrassed I can't keep on top of it.

First question is why on Earth are you doing all the laundry and bedding? My grown up kids at home do their own. If they run out of clean pants and have grotty bedding that's on them.

And we take it in turns for dishwasher etc and have a rule that you leave the kitchen as you find it - ie vaguely clean and tidy with washing up in the dishwasher or done manually.

They aren't babies.

I'd call a house meeting and set out very clearly that to expect you to skivvy for them all is disrespectful and you won't tolerate it.

Get that new shared system up and running then get a cleaner. If their rooms are a tip tell them that the cleaner won't be going in there.

For you having the common areas clean and tidy and the bathroom done will be the prize, and for them if they dint step up they live in their mess.

Why not just get someone in once a week to do kitchen and bathrooms? That alone would make you fell so much better in tackling the other stuff (and won’t require you tidying the whole house beforehand).

We have a tumble dryer but it’s shit e.g. needs to be on all day to dry one set of bedding. Will invest in a new one.
Posters are right, everyone needs to step up more. All the kids will do chores but seem to need a lot of direction and that becomes a chore in itself. And each one will pretend that they haven’t noticed the dishwasher needs emptying and wait for a sibling to do it and in the meanwhile washing up is accumulating.

Good advice about being specific about the main areas we want a cleaner to work on and I would not expect them to do kids’ rooms if they are messy.

Same for us . We’ve had so many too. They either don’t turn up or rearrange 5 mins after the planned arrival time. They leave early and don’t clean well. I would always factor in time to tidy up for them coming then had baskets for miscellaneous stuff so it was off the floor to make it easy for them the clean they they just didnt turn up . One was particularly vocal about how she also lived in a council house but she didn’t have a cleaner and that all her other clients had big houses as if she really begrudged someone in a similar position to herself having any help but fully accepted those with more money deserved her help ??!!

Yes definitely get a cleaner but be realistic
About it. Don't expect a cleaner to do 2 hours every two weeks and expect a clean home. We are 4, dh, ds, baby and me. My cleaner does 10 hours a week
And my home is properly deep cleaned. My cleaner is sooo worth it.

Yes, get a cleaner. I would get the grown up and working children to contribute. They should also be helping more aorund the house.

hun u have three adults and 2 almost adults.
yes i know u have a busy household.
this is about time management and everyone taking a share.
u need a schedule. a really strict one.

u need to get everyone's shifts, days off etc sorted. one day u are all off u blitz the entire place. everything. the whole lots gets a deep clean. u stop for light breaks then back to it. u must be strict. pre warn this is happening so no moaning.

then once then basics are done and the part time husband gets a list of what needs done that day. the kids get their list and so on. it's not an optional list. then u fill in with the rest and do your share.
it all about communication and respect.
ur man and kids are old enough to do this. it's so easy for things to
pile up i know, and habits are hard to break. but u are throwing money away when u have plenty hands who just need a nudge to get the fingers out.

plus a clean tidy home, less stress and anxiety, everyone does things together plenty to
e for fun things together too.

I don’t really understand this argument against cleaners. Surely if you weren’t tidying up for the cleaner to clean, you’d have to tidy up for yourself to clean anyway? So the cleaner still saves you half the job? Or are you saying that when you don’t have a cleaner you just don’t bother with the tidying?

Our cleaner tidies and cleans. She is an angel and I don't know what I would do without her. Get one OP. I really don't think you'll regret it.

Firstly why are the other occupants not doing their share? You are not there to skivvy for them. Each one can do a fair share of housework, cooking, laundry etc. Get a rota going and each agree tasks to be done. If you then want/need a cleaner then those working contribute towards the cost of the cleaner. If they see what that costs it might make them actually do more around the house.

I used to do some domestic cleaning and my favourite clients sounded like you as I love tidying and used to love making order out of chaos.

My worst client was the woman with a show home; she had me cleaning her bannisters with a toothbrush and other kinds of obsessive clean freak silliness and it was as boring as fuck.

You can get a cleaner to clean the bathroom and kitchen, Hoover and mop and dust the surfaces that aren’t too messy.
They might also change bedding, empty bins, clean the oven, do the ironing.

You can explain that you don’t expect them to tidy.
In advance you pick stuff up from the floor and on surfaces as much as you can.

Over time you might manage to declutter or at least pile things up to reveal more surfaces.

I’d think about having someone twice a week if possible. The favourite is obviously Monday and Friday. You then stay on top of things and once your house is cleaner and more cared for you find yourself wanting to do more to keep it that way.

Not all cleaners are equal obviously so find someone who works for you. An agency might be an option.

I wouldn’t be without my wonderful helper and I make sure she knows that.

Sometimes you tidy short term for the cleaner - making room on the surfaces, but not putting things in their proper places, so it’s really an extra job. Or you wouldn’t choose to tidy on a Monday evening, but you have to for the cleaner coming the next day, so it’s stressful.

Ah ok. The way I see it is that I currently do all the cleaning and tidying. So if a cleaner came and did the cleaning part, then I’d only have to do the tidying, therefore saving me a job. We don’t have a cleaner anymore (casualty of the cost of living crisis for us) but when we did I made sure they came the day after the one I’d normally allocate for a tidy (so for example my kids are all at an activity on a Thursday evening for 2 hours so that was ‘housework’ time, and the cleaner came on a Friday morning).

You need a housekeeper not a cleaner 😁