Would I be mad to take this job

[squirrelsinyourarmchair]

In my current role I earn £50k for five days per week (two long days and three shorter days to fit in with school hours).

It is stressful and I don’t enjoy it, it often ruins evenings and weekends as I’m either having to work overtime (unpaid) or it’s just on my mind and I’m stressing about it. I also have to travel approx. once per month.

I applied for a more local role doing something very similar but at a more junior level. It pays £20k for three days per week, 8am - 4pm. No travel and no line management.

Basically I want something less stressful, more part-time and which just generally gives me more headspace to focus on my family (I have two kids aged 3 and 7). We can afford it but it just feels like such a big pay cut and I don’t know if I’m totally mad for doing it.

I’be been a civil servant for a long time so not that worried about my pension as it’s in a good place from years of contributions.

What effect does it have on household income? If total income is going from £50k to £20k that's a tough move.

If it changes income from say £120k to £90k and gives you all a better quality of life, I'd do it (I did do it).

Household income would go from 135k to 105k.

Are you glad you did it?

Don’t do it. I did similar thinking it would be less stressful (school admin). It was in terms of responsibility but it was also really busy, I worked way more than my contracted hours and to be honest I missed the respect a more senior role commands. People often treat those in low paid admin roles really poorly I found. So essentially I found I still worked my arse off for low pay and had much less flexibility over my hours. My role was very rigid in terms of hours and any time off was so difficult to her authorised. I missed organising my own time and leave in my old more senior role. I would maybe think about a lateral move OP

I did it and don’t regret it at all - nobody ever said on their deathbed they wished they’d spent more time at work. You can afford to be around more for your kids so give it a go, it doesn’t have to be forever.

I dropped from £30k base salary + bonuses and high paid project management roles to an £11k job to be part time and in a low pressure role, best decision I ever made. I am so much happier and I'm more present for my children.

For a drop from 135 to 105 I would absolutely do it. Especially if your pension is in a strong place.

Is there anything in between? It seems a big decrease.

I might do it if you are married and feel pretty secure. I know that shouldn’t be a consideration but, well, I probably read too much Mumsnet!!!

It's what you say you want, so yes, do it. While your children are young, you can benefit from giving more priority to family life and balance instead of feeling constantly haunted by work; later on, if you want, you can increase your hours or job commitments and earn more again. And you still have that pension in reserve for when you retire so you will be able to manage quite well financially.

Really glad I did it. It improved all our lives, including DH's immeasurably. Not to go all Stepford, but I did see my role as much more domestic when I was earning and working less and aimed to keep weekends free of domestic drudgery, which meant we all had much nicer family time.

Also, long term I think it improved my career. If I'd stayed I think Id5 have burned out eventually anyway, but having gone almost back to the bottom rung in a different industry, I progressed quickly and with the experience gained from my earlier efforts, I now (12 years later) have a very senior role but work on my terms and have avoided the pitfalls that almost saw me crash and burn.

We are married and I feel secure. But I understand why you’re asking, as I read lots of MN too 😆

There is another job on the table but I haven’t been offered it (been invited to interview). It would pay £30k for 3.5 days and is probably somewhere in between this role and my current one, responsibility-wise.

I did have a wobble about being "dependant" on DH too, even though I had no worries about our relationship. I also had some concerns about what if something happened to DH/his job, all eggs in one basket as it were, but I knew that with my experience and qualifications I could go back if I needed to, even if it took a bit of time.

I would have been very reluctant to leave the workforce altogether, but stepping back a bit kept my options open and vastly improved quality of life.

Can you look at going part time in your current role at all? Might feel less stressful if you aren’t there as much.

Money and hours aside would you be bored to tears after 6 months being a junior? Would you be frustrated not being able to make strategic decisions and set policy etc?

Definitely not an option - part of the problem right now is that I’m meant to be part time but still have a full time workload.

You'd be working 3 days for £20k vs 5 days for £50k. So your comparator for a 3 day work week is £20k vs £30k (your 5 day job prorated to 3 days).

Work out how much tax and NI would be taken - I think you'll find the difference isn't as great as you think.

The key questions are whether you want to go part time and if you accept this means halting your career for a number of years. Will the part time job allow you to keep your skills up to date so you can go to a higher paying job when you're ready to go back to full time?

Also if you go part time, is the deal with your partner that you will pick up more of the shit work around the house and garden? That might not be so fun for you! But a different level of stress and probably more bearable to pick up more of the household work vs working flat out in a FT job.

I feel this is how I “should” feel, but I really don’t.

I know I’m supposed to want a more high-powered role at this stage in my life (I’m 37) but I hate having this level of responsibility and I feel it takes the focus away from my family.

@LorraineInSpain
"Can you look at going part time in your current role at all? Might feel less stressful if you aren’t there as much."

Unlikely, especially if she maintains the same work load and & range of responsibilities. In fact, it would become worse without very careful negotiation.

Definitely go for it, especially with the overall household income taken into account.

I did it, and I’m very glad I did! Went from £60k+ to £24k.

Good luck OP! Sounds like it’ll give you a great balance

I wouldn't but that's not to say I wouldn't look for a different job with more money/the same but different responsibilities.

I've always found if you drop pay you can't get it back again, but there are jobs out there which pay more for less effort.

I did it for a couple of years when children were little. I don’t regret it and I was able to go back to a more senior role when ready. But shortage in my profession.

I did it. I didn't regret it at all until I saw how much our mortgage is going to go up. But if you don't have that on the horizon then I'd go for it.

Go for it then! If you are absolutely sure you wouldn't be bored, and you've got a solid deal with your husband about what that would make family life look like, then do it. Good luck, it'll be fab x

I dropped from 60k to 25k and a totally new trainee role and I've never been happier! I've got my evenings and weekends back and I don't work shifts anymore. You've got to weigh everything up and do what's right for you. All the best to you x

Your personal circumstances certainly allow this and I can see why it's tempting as it fits much better with family life, I couldn't blame you. As long as you are married and your marriage is secure.

I personally wouldn't do this because I would be too scared of being on the "mummy track" and being marginalised and bored and unable to get back into a more challenging role when I wanted to. I totally disagree with the poster who said no one on their deathbed regrets not working more. I think a lot of women come to bitterly regret not having worked more when they get to an age where they can't back into the workforce.

But as long as you keep your hand in a bit I can see why it could work.

If you can afford the drop, do it. I did it quite a few years ago and I’ve never regretted it. My decision was a bit of a kneejerk - a few people in my age range died so I decided that life was too short and I wanted to spend more time with my loved ones.

You’re only 37, so you can always change direction again in a few years if you want to.

Good luck, whatever you decide.