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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to escape the ghetto

457 replies

N15 · 29/06/2023 08:37

I have name changed for this for obvious reasons.

I live in a part of London that has long resisted gentrification, and has a stubbornly high (and rising) crime rate. Stabbings, and even shootings, are far too common. Neighbours have witnessed shootings, with their children. The local secondaries are seen as finishing schools for criminals, with a lot of gang involvement, and knives carried around.

I really worry about my children when they reach secondary school age. I would sooner home school than send them to the local secondaries, but I don't have the ability to home school due to working. I work as a junior doctor, but the wages are low, especially for London.

Any suggestions for an area with decent schools that doesn't break the bank? I would need 4+ bedrooms. Even open to buying land and building, anything to escape.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
41
SirVixofVixHall · 29/06/2023 11:35

Friend moved to Hertfordshire from Hackney and loves it as although not a larger house, she has much more outdoor space.

NomadicNarwhal · 29/06/2023 11:36

@RosesAndHellebores that's really not how junior doctor training works - you are allocated a deanery of which you get some choices, however, it's not the case you can just up sticks and move anywhere in the country once you are in training.

Junior Doctors can start training as mature students (my GP did, she had her kids then swapped careers), having children does not mean someone is well up the ladder, particularly when you factor in LTFW and maternity leave.

RooRooCooChoo · 29/06/2023 11:39

Just piping up from an alternative N15 in which I have never seen anyone shot or stabbed, and in which my young children benefit from growing up in a diverse and friendly community. Of course there is crime and the concerns people have raised about the persecution of young POC are entirely valid, but wanted to offer up an alternative picture before everyone starts pearl-clutching over Tottenham's descent into lawlessness.

SheRaaaaa · 29/06/2023 11:41

beAsensible1 · 29/06/2023 11:34

OP you can move up the road to stokey or archway if you still want to be north.

though i own a house in tottenham and the stuff your experiencing seems bad because its very quiet over my sides.

Maybe move over towards St Anns and Stamford Hill. Its mostly Haredi so very quiet lots of kids

Stamford Hill is my favourite place I've lived, but its right next door to where OP is now.

123wdcd · 29/06/2023 11:43

Which commuter station is work closest to in north London? Then look at the corresponding towns along the main line. People have already noted Welwyn, etc. I have commuted in the past, just try to make it an easy journey at both ends - this will jump the price for outside London, but it will make commuting much more tenable.

If your hours are not standard office hours you also won't have to deal with the overcrowded trains, which makes a huge difference. Cannot say how nice it is to have a house with space and a garden. When I go into the city now I wonder how (pre-DC) I ever lived with the noise, greyness, dirt and crime (I did love city life when I was younger, but could not go back to it).

Dovetail40 · 29/06/2023 11:46

N15 · 29/06/2023 08:37

I have name changed for this for obvious reasons.

I live in a part of London that has long resisted gentrification, and has a stubbornly high (and rising) crime rate. Stabbings, and even shootings, are far too common. Neighbours have witnessed shootings, with their children. The local secondaries are seen as finishing schools for criminals, with a lot of gang involvement, and knives carried around.

I really worry about my children when they reach secondary school age. I would sooner home school than send them to the local secondaries, but I don't have the ability to home school due to working. I work as a junior doctor, but the wages are low, especially for London.

Any suggestions for an area with decent schools that doesn't break the bank? I would need 4+ bedrooms. Even open to buying land and building, anything to escape.

Ghetto???
Get over yourself

Sparkleshine21 · 29/06/2023 11:47

Lancashire!

beAsensible1 · 29/06/2023 11:48

goodkidsmaadhouse · 29/06/2023 11:31

Also I'm sad to hear Tottenham has gone so downhill. One of my best friends lived there and apart from a police raid on her NDNs when we were kids (which we found highly exciting) I don't recall much drama.

I honestly don't think its that bad tbh. Its still unbelievably dirty and loads of traffic but other than i think the crime has really really died down.

but maybe if OP is closer to northumberland Park it might be different

herbaceous · 29/06/2023 11:48

Walthamstow. Most houses under a million, rapidly improving secondary schools, crime going down.

I'm trying to sell my house there if you're interested!

Ws2210 · 29/06/2023 11:49

Skinnermarink · 29/06/2023 08:52

Is it Stoke Newington sort of area?

Since when was Stoke Newington the 'ghetto'? How many 'ghettos' have a Whole Foods?

Meepme · 29/06/2023 11:49

For a million, id move to North Finchley/Enfield/East Finchley/Golders Green. Alternatively Pinner/Northwood. You might need to downsize a bit but there are really good schools and these are safer areas. I do get it, once you see the crime stats and you live in that area, you just want better for your kids, and luckily you can afford it.

Meepme · 29/06/2023 11:51

If it's Tottenham, it really depends where you are. I have friends who love it because of the community spirit, decent schools etc. But im guessing the op lives in a rougher part of Tottenham.

Floppyelf · 29/06/2023 11:51

Penrith in the Lake district. Its what you’re looking for. You can private message me if you wish to know more. Lots of great schools in the penrith area. Low crime rate.

TortillaChipAddict · 29/06/2023 11:55

Please come to NI! You could get a veritable palace for that money, schools are brilliant and we are crying out for doctors.

LudicrouslyCapaciousBag · 29/06/2023 11:55

TBH OP in your position I would be doing everything possible to transfer to another deanery. It is not easy but it is also not impossible. Good luck.

Original poster
N15 · 29/06/2023 11:55

bridgetreilly · 29/06/2023 11:49

These are cheap, but not in Muswell hill proper. It's Colney Hatch, though nothing wrong with that. Thanks for highlighting an affordable area.

OP posts:
Sunflowers80 · 29/06/2023 11:56

pinguins · 29/06/2023 08:53

I think you'll have to weigh up your priorities and decide whether it's more important to stay in London or have the 4 bedrooms, but I don't think you can do both. If you want to stay in London you will probably need some of your children/family members to share bedrooms. As a guide, there are 5 of us in a 2 bed in a commuter town. That's not uncommon around London. We would like a 4 bed so everyone can have their own space, but we can't afford it around here.

As an aside, I love how everyone is assuming OP is white and racist when "ghetto" is used quite frequently by non-white people to describe very run down areas.

I live just outside London, very commutable and multicultural and have heard non white describe certain areas as ghettos

Original poster
N15 · 29/06/2023 11:57

Meepme · 29/06/2023 11:51

If it's Tottenham, it really depends where you are. I have friends who love it because of the community spirit, decent schools etc. But im guessing the op lives in a rougher part of Tottenham.

I'm guessing they have primary age children. For primary there are lots of great schools. Sadly for secondary the options vanish. Not to say the schools don't try hard, in very difficult circumstances, but I won't send my children somewhere where they are at risk of stabbing or gang exploitation.

OP posts: